Death by Crimson
by kia twee
Summary: Sequel to Crimson Eyes. Working together in an awkward environment Hiwatari and Kia are anything but content around each other. Will their attitudes stay professional or will her dreams and his arrogance catch up with them?
1. acquaintance

**Chapter 1**

He was early again.

It had happened unconsciously, he was certainly in no hurry to meet them. The manager had recognised him and led him towards the balcony he had reserved. The eager man talked of trivial things as they walked and he made sure to nod politely, but the content of the conversation flew past him, as did the décor of the restaurant, which he knew, more as a fact rather than his own opinion was very well coordinated.

After reaching the balcony he dismissed the manager quite subtly, in a way that would have done every etiquette master or mistress proud – and certainly his mother. It was amusing how he had acquired her authoritative presence.

Even though there was noise from the party below, the minimum lighting gave the small area a rather solemn and calm atmosphere. This he appreciated, as he leisurely leaned over the railing to look upon the somewhat distant proceedings taking place in the gardens.

His eyes slipped over them, registering minor details without effort, but they sharpened as he focused on the restaurant's entrance.

Elegantly dressed women with smart men were walking in; occasionally thare was an old couple. Good clothes, he noted ironically, made even the shabbiest people look presentable. Another thing he could not fail to notice: every single person looked nauseatingly _happy_.

He was about to turn away, now in a bitter mood, when a blast of music sounded and he was inclined to draw his eyes towards its source. He watched as people, some reluctant most enthusiastic, step on to a circular strip of shiny floor that surrounded a small pond.

Then he saw her.

It was only for a second that he showed surprise; that too just betrayed with a blink and slight widening of eyes. After that he was in control.

She looked the same to how he remembered her, though her wild, curly hair was shorter. She was smiling, something akin to wonder on her face. She fitted into the atmosphere just fine, in tune with the cheerfulness around her. But still she was untouched, unaffected by any exterior thing.

But it was the same with him, he thought defensively, he too did not worry about the past, there was no reason to be concerned about it.

But curiosity, he observed, was a trait they both possessed. He wanted to know if she remembered him, or if she still had those dreams. Did he still haunt her?

His eyed refused to leave her face, but when she walked into the building realisation gently nudged him.

There was no fear confusion, only an awkwardness of not knowing what to think. The perfectionist that he was, he would make sure that there wasn't a single emotion that wasn't right for the moment. But what were those emotions? What was he _supposed_ to feel?

He was strangely aware of this emptiness. His mind was split into two parts, and one, he frowned, did not know what to.

Did he _want_ to see her?

To that too he had no answer. But, he thought coldly, even if he wanted to he could not. The chances were that they both would leave this place and never encounter each other again. And that was best.

Of course, he should have known that life was purposely trying to complicate everything.

Someone cleared their throat and he instinctively glanced back and then turned; to immediately find himself wanting to groan very _very_ loudly.

His expression went stony, something that happened only when he had no other expression to portray. His mind was uncomfortably blank, the moment lasted for decades.

He swore softly.

It was Kia Tilwaree. Someone hated him.

Oh, of course, she did!

"I'm sorry we're late" his eyes snapped to the other woman, Mika Tsukishiro. He nodded, glaring unconsciously.

"Kia, this is Hiwatari-san" she announced, oblivious to the tension "your new editor"

He saw her fingers tighten into fists, a chill spread over his body.

"Hiwatari-san, this is Kia Tilwaree, who I think you know as Anastasia Twee" she confirmed his fears.

"We know each other Mika, thank you" her voice was tight with restraint; he wasn't the only one struggling.

"Oh!" she was delighted "Well?"

"No" they answered in unison. Silence came over and Tsukishiro lead them hurriedly to the table.

As if on cue the waiter walked in providing a few minutes of convenient distraction. They took their time ordering drinks and their dishes.

"So is Twee-sama anything like you expected?" Tsukishiro questioned excitedly.

"Not at all" he refused to say more. He saw her grin slightly, relishing, he was sure, that he was taken by surprise. It was a good thing she didn't know how much surprise.

But that grin made him itch, asking him to scratch it off her face. So frustrating.

So he smiled, doing exactly what any normal person would if feeling the same. His expression turned into one of polite pleasantness.

"So Tilwaree-san, when did you start writing" he asked.

"None of your business" His eyebrows raised. He watched as Tsukishiro hit her hand lightly and gave her a warning look; as if she was a baby.

Kia sighed "In my first university"

"Writing, not publishing"

"Since I was ten"

Both editors looked interested; Mika had not thought to ask her and Kai was intrigued that she had been writing when he had first met her.

Kia was comfortable in this cold formality; it gave her a sense of security. There was no thudding of hearts or turmoil in her head. A slight calmness had settled – but she remained wary.

The interrogation continued.

"You've published two trilogies?" he asked.

"Yes"

"Most of them are often very psychological – any particular reason?"

"I just prefer to write in fields I have studied or researched"

"She did psychology at university" Mika explained.

"And do you have any ideas for your next book?"

Again Tsukishiro piped in "She's always got ideas, she just doesn't know how to develop them"

Hiwatari glanced at Kia questioningly; she nodded to confirm the statement.

"When do you write?" he continued

"Everyday, even if I have to throw away what I've written"

"From now on make sure you keep them. What time of the day do you write?"

Her eyes flashed angrily at his offhand command, but he looked smug, unconcerned. So she answered.

"Usually at night"

"She works on weekdays" Mika interrupted once more.

"Where?"

Now she was losing her temper, with both of them. One couldn't keep her mouth shut and the other was just being rude and too daring.

Still the calm part of her mind was repeatedly telling her that the only reason he was acting like this so he could infuriate her, and now looking at him she saw his amusement.

So she smiled as well.

"You don't need to know" she returned politely before Mika could.

He smirked and the coldness in it made her shiver. It was the same expression – arrogance, knowledge that he was pushing her to the limits and the enjoyment of it.

Hiwatari was torturing her!

A phone ring interrupted them. Mika apologised and left to receive it.

There was silence, along with a mutual realisation that they were proving good entertainment for the woman.

Kai still smirked contentedly at her and she squirmed under his gaze, but refused to meet it.

"How's Elani?" a natural question, he couldn't counter that.

"Fine – even though she was a little hurt at first when someone refused to answer and phone calls or letters"

She flinched and closed her eyes at the pain and guilt. She had wanted to avoid him, not his sister and this was the punishment she received for her neglect.

Kia opened her eyed when she heard the door announce Mika's return. Kai was still staring emotionlessly at her.

"I'm so sorry" Mika said "but I'm afraid I have to leave"

Kia could have laughed at the clichéd situation – leave them alone and expect them to get along. Mika was dumping her on _darling _Hiwatari! Instead she looked concerned, secretly knowing exactly the responses she was going to get.

"Is everything alright?" she asked. _'Of course', a nervous laugh, 'Just some urgent work'_

"Of course Kia!" Mika gave her an unflawed smile "Just some urgent work"

"Oh dear! I'll come with you too!" _'Oh no! You both continue without me. I don't want to ruin it!'_

"Oh no! Please continue without me, I shouldn't ruin it!"

"Very well then, I'll drop Tilwaree-san home" Hiwatari grinned too easily.

Kia could have slapped someone, they were working against her! Oh, wait – the response!

"That's _wonderful _Hiwatari-san. Thank you so much!" Mika was in a hurry "I really must go now! Goodnight!"

"Goodnight!" Kia smiled professionally, but as soon as the woman disappeared she grimaced. In regret.

"I don't want to be here either" he said. Quiet.

"She doesn't like you, did you notice?" she said exhaustedly.

"She doesn't like you too much either. How do you stand the constant smothering?"

"I have more patience than you, and she is very predictable"

She wasn't looking at him.

"We're going to be working together" he said.

She was silent.

"You're probably going to have to speak to me everyday"

No reply.

"And see me every alternate day"

"Do you think I don't know that" He grinned when her head snapped up. "Do you think I don't hate that!"

Kai opened his mouth for a witty comeback.

"Don't say a word! Do you know how horrible it is for me? Suddenly all the credit for my work will be given to _you_!"

He sighed.

"Nobody will know it's me, so those useless congratulations will go to _you_!"

He reached out to grab her hand, but she pulled back.

"And don't you dare to even touch me! I'm not a little girl anymore for you to harass, and I'm not about to be fooled again!"

"Aren't you over reacting?"

"Can you blame me?"

"No"

She almost grinned at him, but then realised what she was about to do and immediately scowled. Hiwatari shut his eyes, counting to ten; this was not going to work.

"If we are to work together then we can't keep bickering" he looked up surprised, she was looking away, slightly embarrassed – a pink tinge just under her eyes.

"I'm willing to not fight, if you agree as well"

He nodded "After all, your income does depend on me!"

She glared at him, but his grin made her look away again.

The waiter walked in with their drinks and dishes and laid it in front of them and stood waiting expectantly. Kai picked up his cutlery and waved one hand for him to leave.

Kia took a bite of her food and then, with the delicate spices, the extent of her hopeless situation sunk in and she coughed. Kai watched her smirking.

"How is it?"

"Horrible"

* * *

**I wasn't going to write this but while reading previous reviews felt entitled to. It does ruin the cliff hanger but it also makes a whole new story!**

**I have no idea how long this will be, or how it will end yet but I know basically how the plot is going to run.**

**Review!**

**Kia**


	2. friend

**Chapter 2**

The door opened into a small entrance hall. Kia stepped in and removed her shoes and coat in a hurry, arranging them in their appropriate positions. She stumbled into her kitchen and reached into the cabinet for a glass and filled it with water. She drank it in one go and then poured some more.

Thirst quenched, she drank more slowly, glancing at the clock in front of her. He was expected in a few minutes, so she decided to get her things ready.

They had carefully avoided any delicate topics of the past the night before and apart from Elani no one else's health was asked of. She didn't look into his eyes even once that evening, too afraid of what she might see.

It was a warm up of sorts. They were playing safe by making sure the ball landed somewhere the other was guaranteed to hit it. A pitiful game of cowards. She hoped he wasn't feeling any braver.

Kia was not entirely certain how she felt about working with him. Of course it would be difficult, but she had absolutely no idea how good he was or if their arguments would remain professional; and at the same time she was hoping they would and wouldn't.

Pathetic, that's what she was, undeniably foolish.

She switched on her computer and arranged the papers on her table in a more orderly fashion. She navigated her way through different folders where she had kept initial ideas that had progressed a little but then stopped. In the corner she noticed was the oldest of the files.

_Death by Crimson._

She stared at it for a few moments, smiling at the irony. She was feeling a bit excited and scared. Then she double clicked on it and it opened to reveal small notations that would make little sense to anyone, though it was a world to her.

The door bell rang and she jumped up and hurried with unnecessary speed to the door. Stopping a few paces away she took a deep breath before reaching out to open it.

He was smirking. That was expected. He also looked tired, not drained but as if he had spent most of his energy. But still had enough left if he had strength to make that face.

Wordlessly she let him in and waited until he removed his shoes and coat before leading him into her living room. He glanced around once expressionlessly and then settled on a chair.

"Would you like some tea?" she offered.

"Yes, thank you"

She hurried about and prepared his drink and when she returned found him leaning back with his eyes closed. She coughed.

He snapped up, alert as ever and received the cup from her with thanks.

"We can do this sometime later if you're tired" she said.

"No, the faster we start the better"

She nodded and then requested him to follow her to her study. The moment they entered she could not help but notice he relaxed a little. Maybe a working atmosphere was preferable to him as well. Then why was he so tired?

She handed him some papers but he waved them away and sat down at the table. She frowned.

"I read your unpublished book, the one you've just finished" he said "Tsukishiro- san gave me a copy last night"

"What do you think of it?"

He grinned "It's definitely engaging, and I like the title especially, but there could have been more energy in it"

"What do you mean?"

"It's a story of youth and to portray that you can use effective vocabulary. Or shorter, fast paced action that makes the reader hurry through the pages. Not too much description"

"Are you suggesting I edit it now?"

"You can if you want to, and I will help you because that is why I am here. It's only been a couple of months since your last release so nobody will complain if your next publication takes a little longer"

"So it's not fine as it is?" she was not liking this, but to her surprise he grinned, eyes twinkling in amusement.

"Oh, the plot is brilliant – having a childlike mind yourself must make it easier to write for a younger audience, right?"

"Are you calling me a baby?" she was _definitely _not liking this.

"It doesn't matter what I'm calling you" he said "What I'm trying to say is that I make things better than they already are. You're good, I just help you become excellent"

She did not reply immediately, but simply nodded. He took the papers from her hand – they contained potential plot ideas, but one was missing from them.

"I would like to edit the story if it is alright" she said finally.

He looked up, nodded and then went back to reading the papers.

"Hiwatari" she got his attention "I have had an idea for a long time and there has been one problem with it; the characterisation of one of the main characters"

"And?"

"And now I am going to write it because I have found the perfect person to base my character on – you!"

He blinked in confusion.

"I have yet to meet a man more cruel and insensitive then you" she said in an offhand way "And as I got this character into my head after first meeting you I think now that I have met with you again why not continue"

"A character based on me? Am I supposed to be flattered?"

"Not in the least. It is the negative character"

"I should have guessed, you're the type who holds grudges long aren't you"

"I am not part of any _type_" She didn't miss a beat "And if you have no objections I would like to observe you so I can have as accurate and real a character as possible"

"And if I decline?" there was a wide infuriating smirk on his face.

"I'm not trying to make you feel special" She sighed "But because you're the only one that fits the description of the character perfectly the story won't be written

"And I'm assuming this doesn't bother you?" he was quite amused.

"Not in the slightest"

"Well, seeing as I won't get any frustration out of refusing I think I might just agree and rest the other chances of annoying you for later, now that I'll see so much of you" there was a wicked glint in his eye.

"I'm not going to play any of your games Hiwatari. We're working together and things are going to stay professional; don't give me a reason to murder you" she informed him sharply.

Something flashed in his eyes. "Believe me when I say that I want nothing to do with you Tilwaree-san, no more than necessary"

She watched him warily for a moment and nodded, allowing his smirk to return to his face. They continued their work.

* * *

A routine seemed to have set up on its own. She met him for lunch, saw him just before dinner and was often walking with him to work. 

He was not nice, anything but. He criticised everything, but Kia flinchingly took his comments in silence and improved with it. He was not disturbed by her observations and never spoke of her initial prejudice which was, she was sure, influencing much of the character that was adapted from him. They did not fight; they were not happy.

There was always a deep tension when they worked. The observations Kia took were made from his everyday habits and they way he spoke and did things, but the hostility did not diminish any further, in fact she had a suspicion it had got worse.

A few weeks after their first night working together Kia walked back late from work; she had informed Hiwatari that due to being busy they would have to cancel their meeting. It was almost a relief to not see him that day. Standing in front of her door she reached inside her bags for the key. But when she grabbed the handle she was astonished when the door just opened on its own.

Kia stood staring at the open entrance for a few moments. She held onto her bag a little more tightly and tentatively stepped into the apartment. Glancing at the shoe rack her heartbeat increased a bit more. Hiwatari's shoes were neatly laid there.

She moved forward now confidently, and sure enough he was sitting on the couch with his tie loosened and coat off, working on his laptop like he had been there a while and Kia had a bad feeling that maybe he had. The tapping of the keyboard did not cease when she entered.

"How did you get in?" her voice was hoarse.

"Hm" he wasn't even listening.

"Hiwatari, what are you doing here?"

He only frowned and held up his hand, nodding absently.

"Stop ignoring me"

Again he nodded, totally absorbed with his screen. She cursed under her breath.

"Kai!" immediately he turned, apparently surprised with her addressing him with his first name and that too with a lack of any honorific.

"Finally" she muttered "How did you get in here and why are you here?"

He blinked and held up a key in silence. Her eyes widened.

"Where did you get that?"

"A key cutting stall" he said quietly, smirk now appearing "I borrowed your key in the morning and put it back at lunch. You have horrible observation skills"

She was stunned by this, but could not immediately reprimand him as at that moment he spoke again, now more serious.

"I am afraid I have to intrude upon you tonight. I will not be in the city next week and therefore as we will be behind in work I thought it necessary to have the evening session"

"I can work without you here" she stated.

"On the editing work yes, what about the new characterisation?"

She was quiet, his teeth flashed.

"I need to eat-"

"There's food on the table Tilwaree-san" he turned back to the screen, eyes twinkling with amusement. She watched him, slightly aggravated for a moment but then calmed and picked up a piece of paper and started making notes, dropping into the couch next to him. They didn't touch.

"Have you eaten?" she asked, still writing incessantly. He shook his head.

"We'll wait till you've finished then" the tapping stopped for a minute, she stared at her paper unwaveringly, writing his name on it twice and then crossing one out, it resumed once again.

When she glanced at him a second later the smirk was a little wider.

* * *

It was a peaceful week. Kia had to admit she was much more relaxed without Hiwatari around, even though she procrastinated a bit. There was time to do a bit of her own reading and even meet up with her friends; it was almost like she was on holiday. One that seemed to be ending too soon. 

She was a little bit surprised when she woke up to find him sitting in her kitchen a week later. Fortunately she had a weird principal of dressing herself immediately after she woke up so when he did gaze upon her he was not shocked by wild, messy bed-hair. He didn't look very happy.

"Umm, good morning?" she was already getting used to his rude visits.

"I'm your agent!" he didn't seem to like the fact either.

"You didn't know?"

"You didn't tell me!"

"It's not like you have to do anything, just make sure I get the right amount of money – which I do myself – and decline any kind of public meeting"

He paused to take in this information "You could have still told me of this"

She smirked "You didn't ask"

"Don't play my games with me Twee"

She blinked at the name for a moment, he was truly annoyed. The silence stayed for a moment but then dissolved as he sighed.

"Now, I have to be somewhere this evening so we'll have to work a bit harder at lunch. I'll pick you up so we don't waste time. Also there is a package I've left for you in the study, it contains a few more proposals from a few publishers and if anything interests you tell me and I'll discuss it with them"

"I thought you weren't my agent" she was smiling.

Hiwatari looked away "Are you ready to go or what?"

"I haven't even eaten breakfast yet!"

"It's always about the food isn't it? Fine, make me some damn coffee while you're at it as well"

A laugh escaped her and she mock saluted. However the frown didn't disappear from his face as he watched her intently.

Kia turned away quickly to avoid his gaze; that man had no sense of humour at all! Apart from when he was frustrating her, but then she wasn't laughing. It would indeed be a day when they shared a joke.

As she prepared the coffee Kia picked up her materials and continued making notes. Suddenly a thought struck her and she smirked, mirroring Hiwatari for a moment, she turned to him and smiled sweetly.

"What would you say if you were confessed to?"

"Depends on what the confession is…" he didn't look at her.

"I love you"

His eyes snapped up to meet hers, a little wide and then he regained his composure almost immediately.

"Drink some coffee and stop fooling around – we need to work" he told her lightly

She hid a grin and continued with the notes taking, purposely muttering "Collected, quick dismissal, and change of subject"

"What are you doing Twee?" he was annoyed, his eyes flashing the way they did when he didn't like something – like a dark shadow passing.

"Making notes, you're not supposed to mind remember"

"Well it has only been for professional reasons that I have restrained myself from complaining about your scrutiny and constant analysis of me but because you won't act your age I don't think I want to put up with it without a good reason!"

"You're talking a lot" she commented seriously "What's brought this on, could you tell me, it will help the plot and I can also assure you that I am certain you could never complain"

"Of course, the plot! Please educate me about this story that requires such thorough research"

She stiffened to his satisfaction "Every story needs research"

"But as I am fully concerned I have every right to know" he justified.

"And I have every right to keep it from you"

"Tilwaree-san" his tone was cold and restrained "I cannot allow you to continue until you tell me the plot and let me decide if it is worthwhile"

"So you don't trust me?"

His brows merely lifted. She grumbled and turned away.

"We're getting late we should leave"

"You're not being helpful"

"You're not either"

She turned and they stared defiantly at one another for a few long moments before she, as always, looked away.

"We need to work together Hiwatari and I would sincerely prefer it if we stayed off this topic. I am quite unsure about the story myself and you wanting to criticise the plot will not help anybody in the least"

"So this will be a failed attempt"

"If that displeases you" she looked up at him this time, anger burning "then I will develop a rough draft of another story that I have written which I am quite sure you will approve of"

If she hadn't looked away that moment she would have seen his eyes become warmer, maybe softer.

"You have a whole stack of them, do you?"

"Is that a problem?" the annoyance was still there.

"Not at all And I think you mentioned something about leaving – I will not appreciate being late, and after all the fault can only be yours"

"Why you-!"

He turned away, to save her the embarrassment of him seeing her attempt to whack him on the head and to mask a chuckle that may astonish her; he also turned away possibly to hide his smile (Yes, he did smile) at his successful, and subtle, work of steering her away from the conversation that had caused a bit of discomfort.

Though as she pushed him out of the door he could not help but wonder what it could possible be about the plot that would make her reluctant to talk. One thing passed his mind and he dismissed it quickly, deciding that it would be better if he kept track of her chattering before he was reprimanded.

* * *

He was late. 

But he was never late. Before this occasion of course. In fact he wasn't just late, he hadn't turned up at all. It was for this reason Kia had sworn a lot, called up her workplace to inform them she was going to be late and then taken the scrap of paper which had his address on it before venturing out to find that particular place.

She should have expected the high class locality, it was surprising he came every night to her place and made no comment about any problems, or how small the house was, because looking at his building it didn't seem as if he would have a problem with space at all.

She reached the right floor and after glancing twice at the number on the paper she rung the bell. She prepared herself to tell him off but she was not ready for what happened next.

The door opened and in front stood not Hiwatari but a young woman, slightly taller than Kia. She had olive skin and was dressed ready for work. Her make up was applied without flaw and she held a coffee mug in her hand. Kia was dazzled for a moment.

"I'm sorry, I probably mistook the address – I thought Kai Hiwatari lived here"

The woman regarded her pleasantly and then smiled in what Kia interpreted to be amusement.

"Kai Hiwatari does live here. Why don't you come in and I'll call him" her voice was mature and had much the effect on people as Helen Hiwatari's did.

Kia was distracted from observing his house by her thoughts deciding to assume who this woman was. And of course who else could it be apart from Hiwatari's girlfriend, they must live together.

She nearly hit herself for thinking that just because he didn't complain Hiwatari didn't have life. He was with her most evenings. Kia had a feeling this woman wouldn't like her once she found out who she was.

Kia was also not prepared for what happened next.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Hiwatari emerging from one of the rooms. Only it seemed that he had just woken up and forgotten to wear a shirt.

_Torture all over again_.

She had a brief memory lapse but the appearance of the woman behind Hiwatari flung her back into reality. Hiwatari stared at her for some seconds and then his eyes went wide and he rushed over and grabbed her shoulders.

"Tilwaree!" he shook her "We'll be late! What time is it?!"

He released her and started rushing. She stood still, momentarily startled.

"Aurin, why didn't you wake me?" this was directed at the other woman.

"I didn't know I was supposed to. I tried calling you this morning and when there was no answer I came to check what had happened. Then I tried waking you but you replied that your head hurt too much"

Kia coughed at this point. So they didn't live together. She wasn't sure whether it was that or the fact that Hiwatari had a hangover that was making her laugh. Then she saw the situation around her and took out a notebook and pen, Hiwatari however noticed and snatched them from her.

"This is not a time to be making notes!" he said and then immediately rushed into what she assumed to be his bedroom.

Kia received a tired look from the other woman, who then followed him while saying:

"I told your office to not expect you in today if it helps!"

At once the chaos stopped and Kia, who had been standing in the same place since she entered, was given back her notebook and told in a frustrated growl to make herself at home. She tentatively took a seat. Then a yell for coffee made her jump up and rush to the kitchen until she realised what she was doing and turned to glare at Hiwatari.

"Just because you have a headache doesn't mean you can make me do your work. Make the coffee yourself!"

Hiwatari frowned at her, but surprisingly did not argue. She did get an appraising look from the woman though.

He returned with the coffee and even handed her a mug, then sat down next to her on the couch so their hips were touching. Kia shifted but he didn't notice.

"Tilwaree this is Aurin Hiwatari, my lovely cousin. Aurin, Kia Tilwaree" At once Hiwatari was hoisted off his seat and his place taken by his smiling cousin.

"I'm very pleased to finally meet you. I know you from Calica, and Ryushi and also Tala and now of course him!"

"You know Tala?" where did her best friend com into with al this.

"Yes, we were in university together and I hear he's in Tokyo at the moment!"

"Yes I an give you-"

"What are you doing here?" Kai interrupted. He was sitting on a high chair to add to the intimidating feel and now looking like his usual arrogant self.

"Looking for you"

"You could have called"

"You wouldn't have answered"

"Tilwaree…" she suspected there might be a warning there.

"Hiwatari?" he looked a bit annoyed.

"Aren't you getting late?" he asked

"I called in and informed them of that"

"What about getting behind in your work"

"That would be your fault, no?"

"How do you know each other?" Aurin's voice interrupted their game.

Hiwatari looked at her and then at Kia.

"Parents" he said.

"They know each other!" Kia added quickly now smiling nervously. The anxious glances did not escape Aurin.

"Wait" Hiwatari suddenly said "You already knew that"

"Just checking!" came the innocent reply.

There was silence, then Kia turned back to Hiwatari.

"I'll see you for lunch then!"

"So it's with you who Kai spends his evenings!" both nodded together without realising. "I knew it!"

Hiwatari's expression froze and Kia opened her mouth to explain.

"You both are going out!" Aurin concluded in delight "You just don't want Calica and Ryushi to find out"

Silence came over once again and before Kia could say anything again Hiwatari spoke.

"We couldn't keep it secret for long, yes?"

She looked at him, shocked, but he urged her to agree. So she nodded.

"You have to go now" he said quickly, smiling at the beaming Aurin "I'll show you out"

"What are you doing?" she whispered at the door

"Securing your identity, what else do you want me to say?" he seemed rather calm in the situation.

"Fine, just don't take it too far" she would not look at his face. With that she turned and hurried away.

Hiwatari watched her for a moment and then closed the door with a sigh. He returned to the living room where a smirk appeared when he saw Aurin.

"Thank you for that! She is incredibly gullible" he grinned.

"I don't like it Kai, please don't take it too far" she echoed the other girl's words.

"I'll try, she's just so easy to incense!"

Aurin looked on disapprovingly but almost smiled at her cousin's obsession. Tilwaree-san had no idea what was happening to her, but Kai did not know what he was getting into either.

* * *

**Hope that was okay…..**

**I'll try to write more quickly!**

**Review!**

**Loggin off**

**Kia**


	3. lover

**Chapter 3**

_It was very dark and that was the first thing that registered in her mind. Then she realised that she was feeling very cold; it was more that her brain was telling her she should be feeling so rather than it actually affecting her, she wondered why._

_She looked down at the ground and saw she was standing bare feet on concrete; she was wearing the shorts she wore in summer and a small vest. But it couldn't be summer – it was too cold. She couldn't hear anything either, nobody was close by._

_She started shivering after a few seconds but apart from that the cold was not paid much notice instead she wondered how someone would describe this situation and setting. Her mind worked slowly, as if tired from extensive work and finally it would not work at all. She felt a little scared._

_She blinked her eyes rapidly trying to stay awake and a yawn escaped her. She wrapped her arms around herself in attempt to stay warm and hopped on the cold ground. The hard floor hit the balls of her feet harshly almost scraping the skin off and she flinched but did not cease her light jumping._

_The temperature was not getting warmer and she sneezed loudly and paused as the sound echoed. The speed of her hopping increased but that wasn't doing much good either, tears had started to trail down her cheeks as she bit her lip hard with effort to stop from crying out in pain._

_Then warmth enveloped her – it was like a cold blanket that had been lying unused for a while; she wanted to pull it closer to herself. She heard footsteps, they were slow and soft at first then became louder and quicker before stopping behind her. She then felt quick warm breaths on the back of her neck and tensed._

_Don't turn around._

_She knew what would happen if she did and she refused to let that happen. However cold hands were placed on her shoulders and at their familiar touch she knew that she wouldn't be able to do much to resist. She turned obediently when she was prompted, but refused to look up._

"_Tilwaree-san……" the voice was clear and she shut her eyes to it._

"_Yes?" her voice sounded grouchy and hoarse._

_A hand grabbed her face and she hissed with pain at its strong hold. Roughly her face was forced up but she kept her eyes shut._

"_Look at me" the command was harsh and cold like the concrete floor and it sent a similar, sharp pain through her._

_She opened her eyes blinking the tears away and focused on the handsome face in front of her, and immediately regretted it. _

_The crimson eyes were pierced through her like glass, striking her own eyes. The pain she had felt in the numb cold now burnt all over her skin. It touched every part of her body and seemed to pull simultaneously at her skin in different directions._

_The cold burnt through her as she gazed into the depthless eyes, helplessly paralyzed. He held her in the moment and she did not see his lips move soundlessly – she was already on the way to her death._

_It was hypnotic and as energy drained from her, her eyes glazed over and she stumbled losing contact with his eyes. She slumped against him, fearful if it was right, if it was allowed but he did not move her. One hand remained on her shoulder and the other was at his side, clutched in a fist._

_She leant against his chest, her head pounding. But then she realised it wasn't her head pounding, it was his heart. His heart beat was gradually slowing almost as if he had been through the same experience as her. His heart echoed hers._

_When her eyes shut and she went limp and fell to the ground there was a smile on her face._

Kia Tilwaree jerked up and was out of her bed in a shot. She straightened her night clothes and rushed out of her room running past the kitchen and towards the study. She didn't notice a certain individual perched on a chair at the counter.

Kai Hiwatari however was a more observant person and he immediately recognized the humanoid blur. He got up, curious to see what had woken her up, and followed her to the study.

She sat with her back to him and was writing furiously. Wild curls were falling everywhere and she was constantly pushing them out of her face, he walked forward and stood behind her peering over shoulder.

Her handwriting was tiny and scruffy however and he averted his eyes which unconsciously fell on her attire. She was wearing a black vest and shorts; also on the leg that was placed on the edge of her chair he noticed a thin black anklet with a silver bell on it.

She shifted and he snapped his eyes to her face. Her expression was of extreme concentration and she had a small pout on her face. Maybe Hiwatari grinned unconsciously. Maybe his eyes were a little warmer as he watched her. But when she finished her fanatical writing there was no trace of that.

She stretched and then looked at the paper with an amazingly serious expression before sighing, getting up and turning around. And then immediately collapsing down again.

Her entire complexion turned grey as she saw him. While Hiwatari had expected yelling he decided this wasn't too good either. Her head ducked and she spoke.

"What are you doing here?"

She knew it was a useless question, one that an answer to wouldn't be given. He knew this as well.

"Are you alright Tilwaree-san, I saw you run out here" there was no concern or curiosity in his tone.

"Yes. I just had a……a dream"

She did not notice him stiffen and look away. She did not see the widened eyes and realization from a memory. She did not see his knowledge.

"Did you know…" he spoke "…when I came in you sneezed about ten times so I came into your room and the duvet was lying on the floor so I had to cover you up. Who kicks their sheets off at night, huh?"

This time it was Kia who stiffened and unconsciously her eyes found words on the paper.

…… _Then warmth enveloped her……_

He didn't even realise what he was saying. She did not want him in the room. Carefully she formed her words and they came out in a whisper.

"Hiwatari-san, I will have to request you to wait in the living room for me, I require some time alone"

He was quiet and though he knew the exact reason for this he wasn't sure what to make of it. However he bowed and stepped out. And at that moment Kia pulled her knees to her chest and hid her head in her arms and tried to think.

Hiwatari outside was also having the same problem.

As he moved into the living room he tried to make a little sense of the situation.

It was obvious by her manner what _dream_ she had had. As flattering as it was why she was having them was something he did not want to think about. She did not have any romantic feelings for him, that had been confirmed the first time he had heard her story and by her constant reminders that in fact her feelings were quite the opposite.

He wondered however whether she knew why she was having those dreams. And despite himself he wondered what they were about and whether she wanted to have them.

Hiwatari blinked his eyes. No, he had to stop thinking too much; the subject was going in an increasingly dangerous direction.

Moments later Kia walked out and he glanced up. She was still dressed in her night clothes but now had a glass in her hand. She sat down next to him and looked the other way.

"I've started on the new story" she said quietly.

"Hmm?" he wasn't interested.

"I don't know what part of the story it is but I like it so I'm going to make sure it stays"

There was silence for another moment.

"Tilwaree-san..." he almost turned to look at her.

"Yes?"

"Today, I think we should take a break"

The glass fell and the water spread over the floor. Hiwatari laughed.

"Surely it can't be that surprising?" he watched as she bent and picked up the glass.

When she turned around to roll her eyes, he smirked and then she grinned. Maybe the atmosphere was a little lighter.

* * *

Kia was sorting through papers when her front door unlocked that evening. She did not pause knowing fully well who it was. Then her name was called. 

"Are you ready to go?"

"Almost" she called back stopping her work "Give me a few minutes"

Kia stood and headed into the bathroom. She sorted out her hair so it looked presentable and put some minimum make-up on. She was already dressed so she stepped out to meet him.

She was about to tell him that they could leave when she saw him.

Kai Hiwatari was wearing a black suit with a crimson tie over his black shirt under his dark trench coat. He did not see her come in as he was looking at a magazine so she had just enough time to compose herself before speaking.

"You did not tell me we had to dress formally" she spoke quietly and he glanced up.

"It is not a necessity" he spoke after a tiny pause, watching her with a tiny amused smirk.

"Is my attire appropriate?" she spoke with caution.

"Perfectly" his smirk widened as he stood and walked towards her and then stopped inches away and whispered again boring his eyes into hers, "perfectly"

Kia felt a sharp pain but he broke the contact and placed a hand behind her back leading her to the door. They got into their shoes and she was helped into her coat after which they stepped outside.

"Where are we going?" she questioned.

"To the theatre" he replied shortly, and the spent the rest of that car journey in silence.

They reached it in a short time despite the heavy traffic in Tokyo Bay. She was led out and then into the lobby of a small theatre. It was packed with people. She moved close behind Hiwatari.

"What are we watching?" she whispered.

He glanced over his shoulder and looked down at her, then shrugged and led her to the ticket booth. He purchased the tickets and then steered her away while informing her they had fifteen minutes and it would be sensible to get to their seats.

They slipped in quietly and Kia was seated next to a couple slightly older than her but obviously more prepared. In fact everyone apart from her was dressed in the most formal attire and she was glad when the lights dimmed and the play started.

It turned out to be a ancient Japanese play, a tragic love story with a considerable amount of violence and passion. While Hiwatari sat silently through the whole thing Kia gasped and laughed at just the right places along with the rest of the audience. The curtain fell, ending the evening with applause.

They walked out into the lobby, Kia smiling with enjoyment and Hiwatari content in his own impassive way. They were however stopped on their way out by a middle aged lady who greeted Hiwatari with a smile.

"Hiwatari-kun! How excellent to see you enjoying yourself! The last time you came to the theatre was a time before my remembrance and I remind you I don have a long memory!"

Kia smiled at her enthusiasm and mock suspiciousness and Hiwatari repeated the greetings with politeness. They spoke for a few moments before the woman's attention turned to Kia.

"Your girlfriend Hiwatari-kun?" she inquired "I must say she is very admirable but what else shall we expect with your picky tastes"

Kia was slightly shocked, at the assumption made as well as the subtle dare to tease Hiwatari, but to her further astonishment he merely smiled politely.

"Yes, Fukiru-san" she went a little cold at the lie "But my tastes do have good results"

"That is certain" the lady agreed, turning to Kia "Hiwatari-kun and I work at the same office as editors, and I have known him a while but this is the first time I have seen him with a lady"

At this Kia's eyebrows went up, way up. she glanced at him sharply and returned Fukiru-san's smile quickly. But she was caught.

"You do not believe me?" the woman grinned a little. Hiwatari was not enjoying this.

"Forgive me, that was not the impression I wanted to give but yes I confess it a hard thing to believe"

"Well maybe I am wrong, but you will have to ask him!"

Before Kia could speak again Hiwatari interrupted her.

"We should be leaving Fukiru-san, it was nice to see you" he said quickly.

Her grin widened and she agreed and after smiling at Kia left them to continue on their way. Kia almost asked why he had agreed to the woman's assumption but then kept her mouth shut and while glancing at Hiwatari decided that Fukiru-san had definitely been wrong about what she had said about him – it was extremely improbable – for some reason that made her giggle.

She laughed at nothing on the way home and this time too Hiwatari was unspoken in his amusement.

"Thank you" she said with a grin when they stopped outside the building "I enjoyed myself tonight!"

Hiwatari nodded at the steering wheel and she stepped out and waved once before turning and walking into the apartment building. He watched till she entered the building and after scowling he drove away.

A few days later, Hiwatari walked up the stairs leading to Tilwaree's apartment a little later than usual. He was, though he would never admit it, looking forward to seeing her, mainly so that he could be amused by the little frustration that he did manage to cause her. He was rapidly relying on her often ridiculous antics to entertain him and sustain his good humour.

He reached the door, brought out a key and opened the door. Stepping inside he proceeded to remove his shoes and called out that he had arrived, a second later she appeared in front of him.

"What are you doing here?" she whispered, distraught.

"I usually come here in the evenings…"

"Didn't you get my messages?" there was more urgency in her voice.

Hiwatari frowned and brought out his mobile and looked at the screen. He had missed six calls from her and also received eleven messages. He opened one.

'DON'T COME TODAY!!!!' burst upon the screen and he looked at her calmly.

"Oh" he stated.

She looked at her watch and then muttered to herself then she grabbed his arm and pulled him through the corridor while he resisted.

"Keep quiet and stay in the study!" she tried to move him.

"Tilwaree, if you explained it to me it would be better"

"He'll be here any moment and I'm not having any more misunderstandings!"

He had no idea what she was talking about "Just tell me what's happening!"

"Hiwatari Kai?"

Both individuals ceased their struggle, Kia still holding on to his arm, to look at the open doorway. A man stood there.

"Tilwaree-san" Hiwatari attempted a polite smile, of course failing.

"Otou-san" she said, almost stupidly Hiwatari thought. She dropped Hiwatari's arm and moved to greet her father.

The man smiled and hugged his daughter, then placed a bag inside and again looked at Kai again.

"You are Hiwatari's son, yes?"

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Tilwaree-san" he said as a way of an answer, nodding slightly.

Tilwaree Elrond moved forward to shake his hand and smiled, though Hiwatari noticed the slight confusion there. He glanced over his shoulder at the girl still standing at the doorway looking quite hopeless and he couldn't resist a grin. The older man caught his glance.

"I wasn't aware you two knew each other" he phrased carefully so the question was clear in the sentence.

They both wisely failed to notice this.

"Qtou-san why don't you freshen up, Hiwatari and I are almost done and then I'll set dinner" she tried quickly. But her father was a bit more experienced.

"But surely Hiwatari-san would like to stay for dinner"

There was silence and both Tilwarees looked at him expectedly. Hiwatari almost grinned at the pleading in her eyes but managed to stay composed.

"I would love to if no intrusion is caused"

Tilwaree-san grinned and she just looked a bit stunned but nodded. Her father looked content and moved towards the guest room and when he disappeared she grabbed his arm and pulled him into the kitchen.

"You are really annoying you know" she told him, and he simply smirked.

"I know you're doing this for your own amusement, the only reason you come here every night is for that" her whisper was fierce "just don't mention anything about authors, understand"

Again he just stared at her, unresponsive. Finally she left out a sigh and he thought he saw her blushing a bit. Quietly he watched as she warmed the food and occasionally he would get in her way just so she wouldn't forget him.

She didn't even frown, and though that wasn't good she did look at him and the third time he did it her lips twitched and she bit them hard – it made him grin.

Minutes later three people sat at the table in absolute silence waiting for someone to start. Then Kia growled in a very unladylike manner and then reached out for the food attaining a chuckle from Hiwatari.

"So how do you know each other?" Tilwaree-san spoke clearly.

Both paused and then Hiwatari took a big bite of his food looking at Kia expectantly – she was the imaginative one.

"We saw each other at a restaurant" Kia spoke slowly and then looked at her father in the eye. "We recognised each other and then stayed in contact"

It was the truth, he would know if she lied; but he also knew she held the majority back.

Kia was silent then and Tilwaree-san turned to Hiwatari to ask him what he did now and how his family were. She watched as they discussed and for a few seconds their voices went mute and she watched their expressions.

She didn't know if there was respect in Hiwatari's face but there was certainly ease. She watched him for longer and then quickly got up to make a note of his expression. Her father stopped speaking and looked up perplexed. Hiwatari grinned.

"She does this all the time, Tilwaree-san, don't mind"

Maybe her father was even more surprised with the confidence Hiwatari made the statement. Maybe suspicions were starting to arise.

Kia returned moments later and the meal continued, she was now joining in to differ on some topic with Hiwatari and their banter was watched closely. Once they were finished both the younger individuals helped clear the table as the oldest retired to the living room before joining him there.

"I spoke to your brother last night" Tilwaree-san said to his daughter.

"Hmm?" she gave no indication that it was something she minded discussing in front of Hiwatari, so he continued.

"You both haven't seen each other in some time" his comment was received with tense silence.

"Ryushi knows where I live if he wants to meet me" her voice was very matter to fact, no emotion revealed.

"I think it is time you both laid aside your prides and spoke to each other" his voice had a slight stern edge to it and he knew she would retaliate.

"Otou-san-!"

"Would you like some wine Tilwaree-san?" a clear voice cut in. Hiwatari was silently calming his daughter down, he realised.

"Yes, thank you" Kia did live here alone, didn't she?

Hiwatari stood slowly and moved purposefully towards the kitchen returning soon with two glasses and red wine. Tilwaree-san immediately noticed it wasn't sweet wine and Kia didn't drink anything apart from that and this bottle was almost three quarters empty. She wasn't served any.

Kia got up quickly and walked ungracefully to the kitchen and they heard loud shuffling until Hiwatari sighed and called out to her that 'it' was on the top shelf, where she had put it this morning. She returned with a scowl and a bowl of strawberries.

Maybe the suspicion was increasing.

Kia rudely neglected to share any of her fruit and no one said a word about that though Tilwaree-san was becoming quite certain that Hiwatari was used to this behaviour. He wanted to confirm it.

"How often do you see each other" the question was aimed at Kia, she couldn't lie.

The girl coughed but was ignored – he was going to blame it on her.

"Most evenings" she answered shortly.

They fell into uncomfortable silence. Hiwatari drained his glass and stood up.

"I should be leaving, it is late" but he usually stayed later, Tilwaree-san decided.

"It was a pleasure meeting you" a bow at the elder man "I will pick you up tomorrow" to his daughter.

Kia silently nodded and was about to walk him to the door when Tilwaree-san spoke.

"Hiwatari-kun" his voice was filled with implications "Please take care of my daughter"

His reply was never known; Kia pushed him out of the door too fast. Maybe that 'maybe' would have shifted to the positive and become a 'yes'. But they were already bickering at the door.

Maybe in a nice sort of way.

Misunderstandings were such naughty things!

That night she dreamed again – it was scary, but she was now so used to it that fear had totally left her. She slept with smiles, the pleasure overpowering her senses.

That night a promise was made, far away but closer than they thought. It was a promise of happiness, sorrow, support and love. It was a vow that finally came to be.

That night he didn't sleep as soon as he got home, it was too early. He was not used to fear. Maybe the same mistake was being made, he wasn't being careful enough and this time it didn't seem like he would be forgiven.

It was strange he wasn't doing anything about it though.

* * *

**Done! I hoped it was good, a bit slow possibly but I need to show they are getting to know each other, which I think they are……I hope……**

**There will be more coming; I have a good idea for the next chapter and I think it's cute but hey, it's my idea.**

**The place where they meet will change, Hiwatari will talk of his ideal woman and Kia will get tired and they'll individually get some of the same not so surprising news!!!! **

**Review!!**

**Kia**


	4. engaged

**Chapter 4**

"You need a change" he said.

"Excuse me?" she stopped stirring her milk and stared at him.

"You need to change your place of writing" he said "I am saying this as your editor"

She laughed, and he was distracted "I know you hate my house Hiwatari"

"That's not true" he answered "You know that"

She still grinned biting her lip. Her eyes were teasing him.

They were at lunch and for once she didn't have her notebook out. She had seemed to have made a lot of progress on the new story though she had informed him yesterday that she now had a writer's block. She had woken up in a horrible state, sweating and screaming and the moment she had seen him she had almost hit him. After calming her down considerably they had agreed it was a bad dream.

_A bad dream_; Hiwatari didn't want to think about it.

"So where do you suggest Hiwatari-_san_" she was still grinning.

He thought about it, contemplating for a second. An idea struck him and she knew it immediately but she let him think whether it was wise or not.

"My place" he said. Her grin disappeared and her eyebrows rose.

"You're characterising me, it'll help with the research and you'll have a different place to write in"

She didn't speak and her apprehension was clear. Hiwatari knew that to some extent she trusted him and didn't think ill of him, but maybe not as much as he thought.

"Okay" he heard her speak softly "We could try it"

"Good" he tried to sound like he wasn't totally unsure about it himself "You can come tonight"

"Tomorrow" she said, and he grinned.

"Tomorrow"

* * *

She was a bit more than nervous. And she could not deny that she was exited as well and that only made her feel worse. The last time she had been there everything had happened so fast that there had been no chance to actually see the place.

She rang the bell.

She could hear nothing for a while and then footsteps and a voice became louder. The door swung open, Hiwatari stood in front of her holding a phone. He motioned her inside.

She stepped inside, mentally apologising for intruding. She was definitely losing her mind!

Kia removed her shoes and when she looked up she was presented with the humongous living room. It was dark and kept neatly. On one end were double doors that let in the wild city lights and she was mesmerized for some moments. Directly in front of her were two doors from where a short corridor began.

It was open and free and all the windows she could see had their curtains drawn and were open, letting in the cold autumn air. Everything in sight was bold, contemporary but still carried an expensive and masculine aura with it.

Hiwatari had disappeared into the kitchen which didn't have a door to it only a large space devoid of wall.

The kitchen was also open and neat with a counter with high stools replacing a dining table and it was here Hiwatari sat, concentrating on the voice of another person. She stood uncomfortably, but he didn't seem to notice her. The bag slung across her chest felt heavy.

He was nodding now, occasionally drinking out of a mug. His elbow was on the counter and he was leaning forward. He frowned then and wanted to interrupt but kept back; she looked into his eyes.

Her body took support from the wall, and she felt dizzy. The cream of the wall blended with his dark hair and blurred into a grey that had patterns of crimson upon them. His unusually thick eyelashes made her angry and jealous. He was interested in the conversation, the depth of his eyes told her that and it was beautiful, but he wasn't looking at her.

She remembered to breathe and she didn't feel afraid. She was conscious and in control. She could handle it now, she wasn't that weak.

He talked now and her eyes drifted to his lips and she could faintly remember an emotion she felt when he had kissed her. It made her blush and she didn't think about it anymore.

She looked away but still felt hot. He said goodbye soon after and stood up and smirked at her.

"Good evening, what would you like?" he had a charming face on, looking frighteningly like a deceiving devil.

"Water please" her voice was low and grouchy.

He nodded and moved to get it for her. He moved towards her to give it to her and waited while she drained it.

"We can work in the study" he informed her, then he slipped past through her, their shoulders brushing and she turned to follow him down the corridor.

They entered through the second door on the right which was made of translucent glass. He opened it for her and as she stepped her heart did a little flip. It was similar to the room in Moscow.

There was a couch in the corner with cushions littered on the floor near it and two overflowing shelves were stationed next to it. There was a small table on one side with a sleek computer on it, but a square low Japanese took up the space in the middle and on it was Hiwatari's laptop and papers. She also saw some sketch books peeping from somewhere.

He pushed her in, a little aware of the recognition she was feeling.

"Sorry about the mess" he muttered moving to clear space for her. But a hand caught his. She laughed in delight and he stared at her in slight astonishment. But smiling with that same wonder she reached rapidly into her bag and took out her notebook.

Hiwatari watched her expressions change rapidly as she wrote things down and slowly he led her to the couch. She dropped down and directed her shining gaze at him.

"This place is _so_ great!" it seemed her writer's block wouldn't last long.

Hiwatari smirked now, he was almost glad she liked it. She proceeded to point out that there was a low table in the room and that it was so cosy and looked so much lived in than the rest of the house and how he was really messy by nature.

"It's exactly like that room in-" she cut her words short and she blushed such a deep red that he knew exactly what memory was running through her head.

"What room?" he questioned innocently, knowing he was close to crossing the line they had carefully drawn.

She didn't look at him, her voice shaking.

"That room you had painted, on the third floor, where you drew, where…."_……where we kissed_.

"Where what?" he was closer than she remembered and he knew he shouldn't be doing this, it was dangerous, in many ways.

She looked up and was caught; his eyes were pulling her and refusing to let her come closer at the same time. She drew in a cold breath that froze her heart. He refused to blink.

"……where I intruded" she was whispering but he was close enough to hear her.

"I didn't mind" what was the assurance for; that he didn't mind? And if so, what was it that he had no problem with?

"No I didn't think so" was it forgiveness for terrifying her? Was it acceptance to the attraction?

He smirked and his eyes gleamed and she knew he was warning her but she wasn't scared. He wasn't exactly the way he used to be. She felt increasingly faint, he was too overwhelming.

Her eyes drooped and he noticed but didn't move away, he kneeled in front of her and leaned in. She knew she was going to slip away. Maybe he knew as well.

Her energy had almost gone and she subconsciously thought that she would love to die this way. His breath breezed over her lips, she shut her eyes.

As she gave way to darkness she felt a little warmth on her mouth and a slight wave of ecstasy. Then it was gone.

* * *

She didn't remember, she probably thought it was a dream. When she woke up half an hour later he told her she had walked in tired and then had been asleep moments after she had sat down. She apologised, he said it was fine.

He didn't tell her he kissed her.

He didn't tell her he had watched her after that, with fear enough to go mad. He had made the mistake, he had crossed the line – it wouldn't be forgiven. He had sketched her after that, his interpretation of the feeling blurring his vision and breaking the rules.

She now came every day. It seemed she had taken a great liking to his house. They worked till late, he insisted upon dropping her and the whole routine was repeated the next day. He was getting used to it too quickly.

"Why do have such a huge house?" she asked him one day while taking a break.

"I bought it last year; while my mother and Calica were here they insisted on a big one. I think they were trying to get me married and settled" she giggled, trying to imagine it.

"So you can be manipulated by the females in your life?"

"Do I look like I'm married yet?" she pretended to think that over and then had an idea and picked up her notebook. He was immediately wary.

"What's your ideal woman?" he voice was controlled and business like.

He went quiet and she noticed his eyes went flat. He spoke in a neutral voice.

"Mature, intellectual…… Not outspoken, dignified and feminine" he watched her intently.

She took note of this, immediately noticing the difference between his vision and herself. An uneasy silence fell. They returned to working.

He gave her a key, for when he didn't get home soon enough. She knew where things were kept now and helped herself to drinks and food much like he had when he came to her place; it was strangely and dangerously intimate.

He was late one day and as she worked his phone rang and after hesitating she picked it up. A lady spoke his name.

"Sorry" Kia said "he's not home, is there any message I can give him?"

The woman sounded very surprised and before Kia could ask for a name she had hung up. Kia forgot to tell him

It had been a month and half of working at his apartment when things started to change. Kia had enough material to start the main bulk of the story and she didn't need to see him all the time, but she didn't tell him that. She didn't tell herself why.

Every opinion she had of him contradicted with another. She resented his behaviour at most times but accepted it. He was polite and made no mistake; sometimes it made her feel as if there was absolutely _nothing _wrong with him. Then she would catch a mistake or peer into the messy study in the corner of his apartment and she would be worried.

When she had stayed with his family he had been the same. Outwardly there was nothing wrong and then she would get a glimpse of a smirk and a menacing gleam in his eyes. She knew something was going to go wrong.

She was quite aware of when he watched her, and it didn't always make her feel safe; that was when she became paranoid. What if things started to go haywire, would it be so bad? They knew each other, she did not hate him. Was he playing another game with her?

It was difficult to remain detached now. He wasn't making any effort to keep things withheld and surely that was not a problem. She glanced from the corner of her eye and sure enough he was watching her, their eyes met, he smirked, she scowled.

"What are you staring at?" she snapped.

"You" he called from across the room. She had insisted on working in the living room, it kept them further apart.

She shifted uncomfortably at his comment, fighting down a blush. His smirk widened and her scowl deepened.

"May I enquire why?"

"Of course" he leaned back, haughty and mischievous. She gritted her teeth.

"Why?"

"'Why' what?"

"Why are you staring at me?"

"Because I want to" he said shortly, amusing himself with her impatience. But she knew this.

"Very well then" a smiled slipped on to her face "Keep staring"

When she looked up five minutes later he was still gazing, his eyes were guarded but his expression was frighteningly tender.

"Hiwatari" she let a whine enter her tone

"Tilwaree-san" he returned perfectly amiably.

At that moment her mobile rang and they both looked away. She rummaged through her bag to find it but as she did the call was cut off. At that moment Hiwatari got up and walked to the kitchen. Her eyes followed him but then she focused on her notebook again. Absently she wrote something.

Her attention never really returned and she stared out through the double glass doors at the city lights, but she wasn't quite focused on that either. Her eyelids were slowly drooping now and she wondered if Hiwatari would tease her tomorrow about always falling asleep at his place. It must've been the fifth, no sixth, time.

But he walked back in just in time and her eyes snapped back open. Instead of walking past her, he squeezed down next to her. She was not quick enough to hide the notebook.

"Cute, huh?" he grinned at her.

"It's not about you!" she denied.

"Then who?"

"This man I saw on the tube" then she blushed and he smirked and nodded acceptingly. After a while she growled

"Don't get too ahead of yourself, it doesn't mean anything" she told him stiffly

"Of course Tilwaree-san" he looked back smugly at her.

She turned away resignedly. This arrangement was going to get her into trouble.

Little did she know trouble had finished its business a long time ago and danger was in full play.

* * *

Hiwatari was waiting for her. He hadn't, mentally admitted it to himself but he was also aware that he continually looked at his watch every few minutes, seconds.

She had not told him she would be late but it had only been a half hour, though the clock was ticking towards three quarters of one. He would wait an hour, he decided, then he would call her. And he waited. But it deemed unnecessary, because forty three seconds before then end of the hour, and Hiwatari was watching, his front door was pushed open.

He was on his feet immediately; he turned and came to an abrupt halt facing the doorway. He moved back and entered the bathroom in the hallway, grabbed a towel and returned to the entrance. It was enough time to compose himself.

He held out the towel to her, but she was still struggling out of her coat. She beamed up at him and his head instinctively turned away. She did not notice.

The girl, because she could be no more than that ever, was drenched. To the skin, he noted discreetly.

Unfortunately for him the towel was first used to dry her precious hair and he stood close to her looking pointedly away. He did not question why she was dressed differently, but just took in the fact that she was. Discomfort washed over him.

She was wearing a short, pleated skirt and a thin blouse under her coat. Her legs were outlined by translucent, dark tights and she was balancing on high boots. Which didn't seem to come off, apparently.

He motioned her to enter anyway and she grinned in thanks. This time she noticed his evasiveness and frowned. But she did not speak.

He followed her through the short corridor, a bit surprised to see her walk so easily. Her wild exterior always pulled him short. Now she looked feisty, not wild. Difficult, but not untameable.

"Do you want to change?" he spoke with his back to her, rude but unavoidable.

"What?" she was distracted "No, that's not necessary"

He almost swore and when she got up and left the room, presumably to go to the toilet he did swear aloud.

He did not need any more coaxing and she was providing him with too much, however unintentionally. His denial was at its edge and she was gently pushing him over and at the moment he was at the stage where dropping everything and just letting the whole thing run uncontrollably sounded most appealing.

Once he figured what the 'thing' was anyway.

She walked back in and unfortunately he glanced at her and saw her hair was now left wild and her tights had come off. She was back to being the girl again, but it didn't make anything much better.

She dropped to the floor onto one of his large cushions and stared up exhausted at him. He met her gaze. She looked away and pulled his laptop in front of her and started working on it. Minutes later she was humming.

He decided to let her be and settled close to her with his back leaning on the couch. As she shifted positions and lay on her stomach using her elbows to prop her up Hiwatari could have groaned. His eyes scraped over her thin legs and he breathed deeply and looked away.

Her legs stayed locked with each other and she swung them back and forth, distracted and clearly not working. He was a bit intrigued and positioned himself to sit next to her so he was facing the screen of his computer.

She grinned at him when her changed positions. She was reading and it wasn't anything useful.

"I am not going to work tonight" she informed his raised eyebrows. "I deserve a day off; I have just succeeded in finishing a chunk of the new book"

He nodded silently, shaking his head bemusedly. He turned back to her face, but her attention was back at the computer.

Minutes of silence passed and then she started fidgeting again, pushing her hair out her face absently. Hiwatari watched her struggling, and then finally reached over and grabbed a pen.

As his hands touched her hair she tensed, but did not pull away. He gathered the curls together and twisted them together gently. Positioning them, he carefully slid the pen through them. Predictably a few strands fell free, but most stayed; they stayed where he had put them.

He was mesmerized by her tangled hair and she consented in staying still until the awkwardness suffocated the room. Then she spoke.

"What do you dream of?"

He smiled when he realised the significance of the question. But she couldn't see him.

"Of all that I want to have, everything I desire and everything I know I will not have"

"Have you ever tried to get it?" her voice was an uncertain whisper. He smirked and leaned down, his breath brushing against her bare neck.

"I'm trying now"

He felt and saw her tense. Then suddenly she turned and his collar was grabbed with one weak, careless hand.

"What do you want?"

He stared at her, a bit worried, not wanting to do the wrong thing. Then he spoke.

"What do you dream of?"

Her eyes were guarded and she let go of his collar but propped up on her elbows so her face was closer to his.

"I don't dream, I have nightmares" her tone was bitter and accusing.

"I'm sorry"

As he had wanted, her strength failed and she landed with a thump on her head, silently swearing. In the background her ignored mobile rang.

"Don't you dare start playing games with me again, Hiwatari" there was clear fear in her voice "I will hit you"

"You won't be able to hit too hard" he countered.

"Believe me, if I do then you'll forget everything about me"

"Impossible, you are unforgettable. And besides you wouldn't let me forget"

"How are you so sure?"

Her phone stopped ringing.

"We have a game to finish and you need me to win"

Then he kissed her. Then the phone rang again. Then she pushed him away, slowly, gently and reached to answer it. He still held her.

"Hello" he smirked at her shaking voice. She listened and her body tensed, he tightened his arms around her..

"What?!" she looked irritated "I've been busy, and yes I was at home last night"

He watched with curiosity as her annoyed expression calmed a little in resignation, she seemed comfortable in his arms, maybe she hadn't fully noticed.

She gasped suddenly and turned to look at him, he looked back with raised eyebrows. Then she was caught in the conversation again.

"That's wonderful" her voice was excited, her expression hidden "When did this happen! I'm so happy for you! Does otou-san know yet?"

She looked up and smiled at him, happily and secretly. He was curious.

"Yes, just hold a second. I'm just coming back"

She twisted in his embrace so she was facing him, she looked happy in a strange sort of way.

"When was the last time you talked to Calica-chan?" her voice held unrestrained mirth.

He tensed now and stared at her intensely.

"Who are you speaking to right now?"

"Ryushi"

He let her go quickly and noticed she was unstable, then he reached out for he phone. As he frantically dialled Kia turned back to her brother.

"Who were you talking to?" was his first question.

"No one" she answered weakly, only too aware of how closely they were sitting.

"Just tell me who the guy is Kia" Ryushi spoke patiently

"No one" she repeated

At that moment Hiwatari spoke loudly into the phone, much to Kia's displeasure. She could almost see Ryushi's exasperated expression. He paused and then demanded she tell him who was in her apartment.

"No one" she answered truthfully. In the background she heard a woman's voice, Calica-chan.

"Where are you?" she countered.

She was told that he was at this moment with his fiancée, but his voice was drowned away as Hiwatari argued on the phone, in the background from her brother's end of the line she could hear a slightly enraged voice as well.

"And I thought we were the siblings that didn't get along" Kia muttered into the phone then immediately regretted it.

"Who are you with?" Ryushi spoke with a suspicion that had already been confirmed.

"It doesn't matter" she answered quickly "I'm really glad you told me and I'm sorry I didn't get the message earlier. I will speak to you later but I have to go now"

She waited a second then whispered good health and a short 'bye' and hung up before he could intervene.

Hiwatari's conversation continued for longer and as he paced in front of her, Kia watched from her position on the floor. His questions were clipped, emotionless and formal and after a while he seemed to have accepted her decision. They spoke for a few more minutes when Kia saw him tense. He glanced at her and then hung up quickly.

"They're getting married" he sounded weak.

"Of course they are, it had to happen sometime!"

He nodded and dropped down in front of her, he stared but his eyes were unfocused.

"Hiwatari?"

"Tilwaree-san" a slight smirk appeared on his face and she turned away in a huff.

Slowly he pulled himself closer to her.

"So did I win the game?" his voice was deliberately low.

She jumped and turned red, but scowled and pushed him away, getting to her feet fluidly.

"I don't believe I can work today so I will go home, I can take the metro, and it's early enough"

He watched her hastily put her boots and coat on and as she flung her bag onto her shoulder he grabbed her arm and touched it to his lips before releasing.

"You are such a sore loser"

* * *

**That must've been the most pointless chapter I've ever written, but it did have a few useful things.**

**Well I'm not particularly happy with it so I won't mind horribly if you too think the same.**

**Review!**

**Kia**


	5. family

**Chapter 5 **

Kia yawned loudly. It was quite late and she was still working, but was also unwilling to stop as she had almost finished. She was alone and for that moment Hiwatari did not matter, he never had. Work came first.

When she did finish, a bit later, she stretched and stared at the computer screen before shutting the file with satisfaction. Now that her mind had stopped buzzing with crowded ideas she noticed the house was unusually quiet. It wasn't strange; Hiwatari always made it a point to put on some music, however softly. It was one of the things she had noticed about him, he didn't like total silence. On the contrary Kia relished the quiet.

But what she did find strange was that even though she was comfortable with the silence there was a slight glitch in the atmosphere, almost unfinished.

Earlier that evening Hiwatari had gone for a party, of which she had declined the invitation, and left her alone to work in his apartment. As Kia thought the situation through she realised it could be rather suggestive to an outsider, it sounded rather dangerous to her too.

She had nothing to do now, so for a few moments she browsed his shelves but was unable to find something to interest her. She remembered him telling her about some more books which he had put in the spare rooms and she, wanting to investigate, stepped out of the study.

She opened the first room she encountered, but immediately cold air hit her and she shrank back; even if the books were in there she was not going inside. She walked, missing out the next door and to open the one which led from the living room. Then she remembered her first visit to his apartment and that it was this room Hiwatari had walked out of that morning.

Kia hesitated.

It would be good research, she told herself, and anyway, he wouldn't find out. Thinking this she turned the knob and stepped into the room.

It was dark and a little cold; she could feel a slight breeze from the open windows and wrapped her arms around herself. The door swung back shut after her and she flinched as the slam echoed. She stood still for many moments letting the darkness embrace her and then felt around for a light switch. She couldn't find one.

She stepped into the middle of the room tentatively, and as her eyes adjusted to the darkness she saw with wonder its great expanse. Leave it to Hiwatari to claim the largest room for himself.

The city lights brought little light in through the thin curtains which shifted in the wind. She could make out the bed and certain other pieces of undistinguishable furniture. Slowly she loosened her arms and let them fall to her sides, allowing the wind to gently caress them. She didn't feel too cold anymore.

Even though she couldn't see it very clearly she could imagine what his room would be like. Reluctantly neat, presentable and yet containing a uniqueness that was so distinctly _him_, it could never be mistaken.

She had so many dreams. Numerous amounts now, without fear and hate; they were cold though, refreshing. She never looked at his eyes in the daytime; that would be too overwhelming.

She stayed there for a long time, in the open, cold darkness. Then she left the room seemingly undisturbed.

She was reading when he arrived a bit later and though she was aware of him immediately, Kia did not move from her seat. He came into the study to find her.

"Are you done?" she liked his voice Kia decided.

"Yes, all of it" she glanced up briefly "You'll have to check it tomorrow"

She could feel his gaze on her, and then he walked behind her, peering at the book over her shoulder.

"That's fine, it is a holiday" his breath blew over cheek, cool and tingling.

She shut her book and leaned her head against his gently; he stiffened, she grinned.

"How was the party?"

"Uneventful", he answered shortly, still managing to stumble over the syllables.

"Really…." She turned to look at him, and he, at being relived of her head, stood up straight.

"Aurin asked about you" he informed her stiffly "She was quite displeased you couldn't come"

"I'll apologise to her the next time I see her"

He was silent, as if struggling with himself. He took a seat next to her.

"Are you happy?" he asked her. She looked at him, startled.

"Yes" she frowned, but was sure "Definitely. I have everything I need"

"Do you have any goals?" now she grinned, then laughed.

"One" she held up a finger "I want a house big enough for a library with books in it that I haven't read"

His eyes widened. It was the last thing he had expected; he knew she liked her books but he had been expecting a wish for some kind of emotional satisfaction, not _books_. But it wasn't entirely strange either.

"So you want a big library?" a plan was forming in his mind.

"Huge one!" she actually looked like a little child.

"So have you started looking around for something?"

Immediately her face twisted into a frown and she looked a bit annoyed. He was going to apologise for asking but she spoke before he could.

"Houses that have the size of the library I want, or even a library itself, are quite expensive"

His eyebrows rose. Again, the idea that her worry had been over money had not been expected.

"You're concerned over the cost of the house"

She rolled her eyes "Wasn't that what I just said?"

He stared at her intensely. His thoughts were turning rather chaotically and the idea itself could bring in a lot of trouble. Temporarily only of course, he hoped, but trouble nonetheless.

She tried to get his attention, even waved her arms in front of him but for many minutes he was entranced by the promising idea and he only looked at her when it was fully formulated.

"We'll get you some ads to look at tomorrow" he said.

"Are you deaf? I can't afford it Hiwatari!"

"Of course you can! Tilwaree-san is a successful author, no?"

"But-" he was up to something, she knew it.

"There's no harm in just looking around" he pushed her protests down. "For now however, you can sleep in the guest room"

"Excuse me?" she was caught of guard by the quick change of subject.

"I'm too tired to take you home tonight" he stated, as if that cleared the case.

"I'll take the subway" she was on her feet, already gathering her things.

"Are you crazy? I'm not letting you go this late!"

"I'm not a little girl Hiwatari"

"I am all too aware of that fact, which is the reason I'm so against you travelling alone Tilwaree-san" he grabbed her roughly.

"Either way I can't stay" she told him firmly, determined now.

Hiwatari frowned; she obviously didn't trust him a lot and this annoyed him. It irritated him more than it should annoy him.

"Very well" he said quietly, stepping back.

She looked at him silently for a few moments, totally aware of something that had gone wrong. Then she nodded and brushed past him. A few minutes later he heard the door shut.

Kia walked fast. It was cold and about to rain and she had no intention of falling ill. The city was still crowded and for a moment she relaxed into its warmth, but her spirits immediately dampened as she was reminded of Hiwatari.

She had not wanted to stay, had that offended him? That man was too self sensitive for either of their sakes; she sighed but a smile appeared on her face. That man was truly too proud.

She wasn't too worried, he was quite overprotective and over reactive for the matter; maybe she was being a bit harsh. Kia grinned. Hiwatari would come round, after many apologies and grovelling, but he would.

Hiwatari wasn't going anywhere.

She stopped seeing a small takeaway restaurant and then slowly took a step towards it. Surely it didn't matter if she stopped for a midnight snack, it was even quite full. She hadn't eaten that evening.

Kia walked in and was happy to see it still full. She stepped towards the counter and gave her order, which she promptly collected and took a seat in the corner to eat. A few people glanced at her, but Kia didn't mind. Dressed in office clothes, carrying a slightly large bag and single, she looked a slightly pathetic sight for a late weekend evening in the highly crowded Tokyo Bay.

Kia even grinned a bit wickedly at a few couples and then, when it made her feel too old and middle aged she opted for concentrating on her food. But peace was never her friend.

"Aren't you supposed to be going home?" she looked up and Hiwatari glared back at her.

She didn't answer him immediately, though she did notice simultaneously that he didn't seem to be wearing a coat and he was currently attracting the attention of too many females for her comfort, so she glared.

"What are you doing here?" she was a bit startled but then she became more annoyed when he took out a cigarette and lit it. Since when did he smoke?

"You didn't think I was going to let you go home alone, did you?" Kia stared at him in surprise and then ducked her head blushing softly.

Hiwatari merely took a seat opposite her.

Slowly she ate some food, letting Hiwatari just stare at her. She didn't feel that awkward anymore, she almost felt happy. And now she was also going quite insane.

"Are you going to be done anytime soon?" he drawled, impatient.

"Don't you feel cold?" she asked.

"Are you a delinquent?"

"Why are you so arrogant?"

It continued into the night, Kia was happy. Hiwatari wasn't going.

* * *

Less than a week later Kia found herself taking the train to the outskirts of the city. She was a bit annoyed as Hiwatari had somehow managed to persuade her to go see a house at the edge of Tokyo. He had been suspiciously excited, but refused to go with her and Kia was therefore sent alone. That man was strange.

He also smoked more often. She wondered what that meant.

The advert for the house had been short and did not mention the price. In fact it didn't mention a lot at all. Despite this Hiwatari was determined to go make her go see it, something about the area he had said….

The area, she had to hand it to him, was commendable. It was quiet with what seemed like large estates and wide roads surrounded by well kept greenery. It was quite different from Tokyo Bay that had no space for such luxuries. Kia frowned.

The house was a short walk from the station and when Kia reached it she was quite awestruck. It was quite magnificent.

It was not a western styled house, but a traditional Japanese one. It was half hidden behind large, stooping trees and a carefully designed garden. From the distance it looked tiny and serene, but sat quite proudly, even arrogantly. It was a house she would never have dreamed of, never visualised, never expected.

Her trance was broken when someone opened the gate for her. She was escorted in and shown the gardens by the men who managed them. Not for a moment did her interest flee and she was captivated by everything she saw.

The head gardener explained to her that no one lived in the house at the moment but it was always taken care of due to the young master's wishes. Later Kia was escorted to the door to be shown the house by a pretty, middle aged woman who announced herself as the housekeeper.

Kia smiled but she was only greeted with a haughty gaze and a slight, almost casual bow. Her expression faltered and she turned away confused but followed the woman into the house.

The house was very large and high. It had many courtyards and Kia was delighted with everything she saw. It was not something she had imagined and that only increased her delight in discovering that she liked something new like this.

The woman kept glancing at her, at every chance she got. It unnerved Kia but she did not comment on it.

There were a lot of people there. Many were doing chores and others simply passed by, but none looked directly at her. A system that she was unaware of had been put in place.

The last room they were to visit was the library. The housekeeper had told her this at the beginning so every moment built up Kia's anticipation. She was led to the west end of the house were the house stood tall and was connected to the rest of the house through an open corridor that ran around a small courtyard.

"I would beg mistress to remove her slippers" the housekeeper had already done so.

They had already exchanged their outdoor shoes for slippers at the entrance but Kia was unsure why they had to proceed bare feet. She asked and the woman seemed to frown.

"The master and young master are very careful of their reading material. Some texts are even originals. We like to keep the area as clean as possible and it also adds our reverence for the books"

For a moment Kia felt foolish, as if she was being reprimanded, but she bowed her head and complied. The woman slid the door open and then stepped to let her enter.

Kia felt she just been punched.

Inside was what seemed to carefully arranged rows of bookshelves. The ceiling was low and the bookshelves reached a height that was just a bit above her reach. In the corner at a distance was an empty space with a large desk and chair and a few armchairs. Near it was what looked to be a ladder.

"Are all the floors…?" she looked at the housekeeper in amazement.

The woman smiled quite smugly "Yes mistress, the whole building is the library; it has been filled with books by the various masters through the centuries"

Kia's amazement was not discouraged by the woman's arrogance. She stepped inside tentatively, as if approaching some magnificent danger. Looking back once she received a reluctant nod from the woman and then set forth o explore. She spent the rest of the afternoon in the building.

Later the housekeeper led her to a small room where Kia was served tea and received by the steward of the house.

Details of the house were discussed and Kia began to feel more and more uncomfortable with the formality and hostility that she was being treated. It seemed as if they didn't want the house to be sold, but then why was she being entertained so?

"May I ask please, why does the master wish to sell the house? I have been told that it has been in the family for many generations and I cannot understand why he would want to get rid of it."

The steward exchanged a glance with the housekeeper who stood to one side. Her scowl seemed to deepen. Then he spoke.

"The decision to put this house up for sale was not the master's but the young master's. I am not aware of the reason behind it but I can enquire after it if you will it"

Kia shook her head "No thank you, it will not be necessary"

"Does the mistress have anymore questions?"

"Ah, yes. I was wondering if the staff would be willing to remain if I did buy the house."

Both people seemed surprised by her question and stumbled in the affirmation of the fact that all staff would gladly stay if she willed it. Finally Kia asked the price. She was told it and her eyes widened. Seeing her expression, the housekeeper, now seemingly gentler, assured her that it was up for negotiation. Kia smiled in thanks.

She said she would get back to them and left, unaware of their gazes following her with interest.

* * *

"Hiwatari, are you listening to me?!" she whacked him over the head. She was kneeling next to him, while he read. For full fifteen minutes she had been ranting about the house but had not received a single comment from him.

"Hmm" he did not look away from the book.

"Can you please look at me" she was scowling.

"I can still hear you" he was smirking slightly.

"Then what did I say?"

"That you liked the house, you haven't explained why yet but that was the gist I got from your squealing"

"You don't have to be mean just because you're right!"

He just nodded and concentrated on his book. She watched him for a few seconds and then looked away bored, then she looked back and saw him blink rapidly and look away from her. She noticed suddenly how close she was leaning in towards him; a bit embarrassed, she shifted back. A relieved breath escaped his lips.

"So why did you like it?" he was still staring at that idiotic book, but Kia smiled.

"Do you know when you have an idealized vision of something? I had one of the kind of house I wanted. It was nothing like that"

He tilted his head to frown at her.

"What I mean to say is that it bore no resemblance at all to my vision and I still liked it. As if someone already anticipated what I would like and made it for me"

"Are you going to buy it" he spoke carefully, Kia turned to frown at him.

"Of course not!" Just as she expected his eyes widened and then his expression was composed quickly once again. She smiled, she could read him now.

"Why not? Didn't you like it?" it was an uninterested tone, she wanted to laugh.

"It's too far away from my workplace. Think of all the money I'll spend travelling! The management cost of the house will also be a lot. I wouldn't be able handle it"

"But you said the price was good"

"The price is great. It's surprisingly low so there's no way they'll be making any profit. It makes me wonder what's in that young master's head. Not much, by the look of things"

Hiwatari sighed loudly.

"What?" she asked him.

"Nothing. If it's a good house why don't you just buy it? Maintaining it won't be that troublesome, you'll always have money coming in as your books keep selling"

Now she sighed. He raised his eyebrows.

"It's a beautiful house. It's what I'll always want from now" she spoke seriously now "Not yet though. It'll be lonely living there. I'd buy it in a few more years, when I have someone with me and there would be more people to fill the house"

He looked surprised, and quite openly that too. She did laugh now.

"Is it that shocking?"

He started. "No, it's normal. That's why I'm amazed"

She glared at him lightly.

"So you don't want the house now because you want a family to live in it with" he confirmed, she nodded.

"So what about me?"

"Sorry?" she whirled around to stare at him.

"Where do I stand as potential family?"

She blushed and got up quickly. He smirked and turned back to the book. She spent longer than needed to get a glass of water; she even got one for him as well. The previous comments were apparently forgotten.

"So what's the plan for next week?" Kia took the book from him this time, looking at the cover to see what it was about.

She didn't see Hiwatari tense slightly and gaze expressionlessly at a distance. She looked up and prodded him and he broke out of his trance.

"Well?" she questioned again, frowning.

He got up carefully and turned his back to her.

"No idea" he told her. Kia huffed and returned to her investigation of his book.

* * *

As the next week rolled by Kia realised that it was quite impossible for Hiwatari not to have any idea what was going on and that was also when things started to go wrong.

At first she wasn't too worried about his absence and as she had not seen him in the morning Kia did not go to Hiwatari's apartment that evening. Then it happened the day after. And the day after that. This was when Kia started to worry.

She called him, he didn't answer. She called his house, he didn't answer. She went to his apartment, but he hadn't been there since the day after they'd last met – the answering machine told her that, he always checked his messages. Then she rang his workplace.

"He resigned?" she spoke quietly through the phone, suddenly struggling with herself.

"Yes" the voice at the other end told her again "He was supposed to leave many months earlier but he extended his stay. He left last week"

"Is there a follow up address?" she persisted.

"I'm afraid not. Hiwatari-san did not say why he was leaving either"

She numbly thanked the person and put the phone down. That night Kia had nightmares. Nightmares about crimson eyes, smirking lips and dark, long strands of hair.

The next day she was cornered at work by Mika Tsukishiro who decidedly made things worse.

"HE QUIT!" she was louder than she needed to be.

"Yes Kia" Mika, who was now her reinstated editor, took a step back "He didn't tell you?"

"Was he supposed to?" Now Kia was intrigued.

"Of course. He had made a contract to his convenience which stated he could leave when he chose, considering he had helped you with a certain amount of work. From what he told me, you have finished two books under his guidance now"

Two books. Of course, an original one she started with him and another he had given her the option of editing; more of persuaded her into working on.

"I am afraid I don't fully understand what the situation is, please could you explain it to me"

"Hiwatari-san was to leave a few weeks before he was appointed as your editor and as it was his last few days he had to keep visiting the publishing house to tie up loose ends. I think he overheard me discussing your books with someone and then for some reason he wanted to take over"

"And they just let him?"

"I guess he was valuable to the company and they wanted to keep him for as long as possible"

"And that's it?" Kia was a bit shocked by the abruptness of the events.

Mika nodded, slowly. Kia thanked her and told her she would get the recently edited book back to her for publishing and that the original one needed some finishing touches. She left work early that evening.

When Hiwatari would return to his apartment he would find an envelope just inside the door. In it would be a key and an unsigned note saying:

_Thank you. I enjoyed the work we did together.

* * *

_

**Finally, a development! I hope you guys enjoyed that. I will be hounded by exams in a week's time or so but I will try and update sooner, I promise!  
**

**This chapter been a bit rushed and I will welcome any criticism you have in that respect. I would also like conformations of whether the content was understood or not. **

**Thank you for the continued support. Review.**

**Kia**


	6. home

**Chapter 6 **

"You're on leave from tomorrow Tilwaree-san?" she turned to find Mika approaching her. She grinned and nodded her conformation. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to visit my family in Osaka" Kia told her "I'm leaving tonight. You didn't come all the way to just ask me that?"

"Yes" Mika smiled at her bluntness "It was just to inform you that the book you were editing will be ready for release in three weeks"

"That's great! It's been on hold for almost six weeks since I handed it in"

"It was just after Hiwatari-san left so it took a bit of time with changing editors"

"That's not a problem" Kia's became strained "It's finally done and that's what matters!"

"Also I needed to know when you were planning to hand in _Death By Crimson_" this made Kia frown.

"Ah, I'm not sure. It still needs polishing but I've been having a writer's block recently, so not too soon"

"Take your time!" It wouldn't be released to soon either so it's alright. You could probably give it to me next year and it would still be fine!"

"Do not say that Mika-chan it would be too tempting!" the two women laughed at this but were interrupted by a message of a phone call for Kia. She thanked Mika and escaped to take the call. Surprisingly it was her father's butler.

"Wei? Is everything alright?"

"Yes. We have just received news that we will be having some more guests join us and I wondered where you would like me to place them"

Kia sighed. Being the only woman in her family meant that most of the domestic decisions were made by her, though she had not expected it to remain that way even after she had left.

"Are they Ryushi's guests?" she kept her patience though.

"No mistress. One is Hiwatari Calica's and the others I believe are her parents and younger sister"

"Only her younger sister?" Kia's heart raced.

"Yes, that was what I was told"

"Fine then, Prepare a room in Ryushi's chambers for Calica-san. Give the Hiwatari couple a room near the back, downstairs. For Elani-chan and Calica-san's guest you can prepare the rooms on my floor"

"Very well, is there anything else?"

"No, just make sure everything looks presentable. I hardly want to put a bad impression on Calica-san's mother, I believe that women once ran a housekeeping school!" Kia sighed distractedly "When is everyone arriving?"

"Ryushi and Hiwatari-san will arrive this evening and her guest is expected later in the night. Tilwaree-sama will bring the Hiwatari family the following evening"

"I will see you tonight then Wei"

"Of course mistress, have a safe trip" they ended the conversation there.

When she was still in school he father used to be at home most of the time but after Ryushi and Kia had gone to university he began to work increasingly outside the city. Even Ryushi travelled due to his job and that often left the house empty save for the staff. It would be incredibly full, with not only her family but the Hiwataris as well. She was looking forward to seeing Elani-chan again.

* * *

Kia got out of the taxi quickly after paying; it was unusually cold and she was eager to enter her house. Clutching her bag she ran to the door and rang the doorbell and waited. A minute later she rang it again and waited. Finally, when she was moving to push the door off its hinges it opened to reveal a smiling butler.

"I think you do it on purpose" she informed him solemnly "Torture me for amusement"

"Surely not mistress!" Wei gave her a look of mock horror which Kia returned with a sour one of her own, indicating that she was indifferent to his sentiments.

Wei helped her carry her little luggage to her room, on the way informing her that Ryushi and Calica-san had already retired after their long journey. Calica-san's guest, who was revealed to be no other than her brother, would be arriving within the hour.

The information was so ironic, so conveniently predictable and tragic that Kia found she could not react to it enough. She should have expected this. The last weeks had been too uneventful to last any longer and she should have rightfully prepared for this since the day he had disappeared. In fact, the lack of preparations were almost amusing, Hiwatari and complications _did_ come hand in hand. However, she was known to work best under pressure.

It would be quite impossible to confront him in the presence of both their families, so Kia concluded that she had to speak with him the moment he arrived. It did not matter if it was just a little after midnight, she knew what she was going to say and this time he wasn't going to get away with anything but a fully explained apology. Accepting it could be considered later.

She waited in the entrance hall with Wei as he briefed her on all the arrangements they had made for the guests. However Kia was hardly listening and it was only too soon when the bell rang. She stood back as Wei waited a few moments before opening the door. Didn't want to seem too eager.

The first thing she noticed was that he looked very pale and thin, incredibly more as his skin contrasted with the dark suit he was wearing. It immediately reminded her of the first time he had come to her apartment, only now he looked more drained.

She watched silently from the background as he questioned Wei on where to park his car and she noticed the relief on his face at being told it was fine where it was. She almost felt bad about cornering him then. That thought, however, was fleeting and she stepped forward to make her presence known.

"Would you please take Hiwatari-_san_'s things to his room Wei. I'll take him to the living room"

Wei seemed slightly startled at the commands, but he obliged unquestioningly. The other man had stiffened at her voice and slowly turned to stare at her with astonishment that told Kia he had not expected to see her. She watched him for a moment, enjoying catching him off guard, but then inclined her head for him to follow him.

They walked through the short dark hallway and he banged softly into her as she stopped to switch on the light. They both noticed how quickly she moved away.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, and she knew he was running a hand through his hair without even looking.

"Did your sister not even tell you at whose house you'd be staying at" she heard him groan at that and turned in satisfaction. She frowned when she saw him leaning against the doorframe, a hand over his eyes, smiling softly.

"I'm not prepared" he muttered heatedly.

She watched him, but he was still grinning and she was sure there was a light twinkle in his eyes. This time a frustrated hiss escaped her lips. He chuckled.

"What?" she questioned defiantly, irritated by his ease at the situation.

"You worried me" he stated, removing his hand to peer at her, still grinning "I thought you would have gone a bit crazy…."

He laughed openly now.

"…don't you love me anymore?"

Kia groaned loudly, leaning back against the cabinet. Of all things why did he have to start off by being arrogant?

"I think you're sleep deprived" she told him, annoyed. He was still grinning. This was not going the way she wanted.

How had she wanted it to go in the first place? She had wanted an explanation for him leaving, but was she entitled to one? Their relationship was _supposed _to be strictly professional so why was she so offended? They were at least friends though, so she was entitled to one.

Friends, of course; _who _was she fooling?

She glared at him, irritated by the turn of her thoughts. She had long since given up on her hatred for Hiwatari but that did not mean another extreme emotion was permitted to take its place.

"I agree with your observation" he told her "I am quite exhausted. Can we discuss the some time when I am in the mood to verbally spar with you?"

For a moment she was ready to deny him that, but the exhaustion was weighing down on her more too. Furthermore, after actually seeing him she had realised that more than anything she didn't want to argue with him. It was alright in light hearted situations but she felt oppressive and being associated with a negative word didn't appeal to her at all.

"Fine then" she snapped, making sure he knew she wasn't happy about it "I'll show you to your room"

"Always the perfect hostess…" he quipped; Kia stepped on his foot on her way out.

They walked quietly, with Kia in front and Hiwatari almost on the verge of humming pleasantly behind her. The amusement he radiated was so familiar and comforting that she forgot the anger in seconds. He was the one that was oppressive.

They soon arrived at his door and Kia stopped and turned, looking at him once in the eye before muttering goodnight. He nodded slightly at her, a light smile in place promising to make amends. Kia felt a weight lift off her as she accepted this and turned to leave but stopped, and had to turn once more when he called her name.

She was momentarily startled as something was flung at her and instinctively she reached out to catch it. A very tiny and familiar key was grasped by her fingers and she glanced up to see him smirking slyly.

"You forgot it in at my place" he informed her and escaped into his room before she could give an answer.

She stood staring at his closed door with deep hopelessness, and knew he was standing on the other side incredibly satisfied. It made her so angry, frustrated beyond comprehension. She was finding it rather tempting to bang on his door and scream obscenities so loudly so as to wake the whole house. He had, in returning the key to her, which the both knew she had definitely _not _forgotten, secured himself to her. Somehow, Kia was too angry to contemplate how, he had manipulated the situation into one so that their relationship was exactly as it had always been. That malicious man had lied when he had said he was not prepared, those smiles were deliberately disarming.

She despaired when he outwitted her. She despaired often.

* * *

It became quite evident the next day that they would have no opportunity to talk. Kia could not be annoyed about this because she knew it was what Hiwatari had intended and she was not going to do anything to satisfy him any longer. They came to some sort of mutual agreement that they were strangers, at least as far as their siblings were concerned. She had to be careful to speak politely when Calica reintroduced them; Hiwatari was perfectly amiable, not a glitch in his charm.

They were not given an opportunity to interact directly all day. Calica spoke the most, discussing the wedding and catching up with her brother. Kia steered clear of her own twin; their way of reuniting would be private. Kia knew they would both have a talk that evening so there was no need of one now.

Ryushi did not talk at all in fact and though she was worrying, Kia would not voice it either. Calica spoke to him gently and he acknowledged her so she concluded they had not had a fight, but something continued to remain amiss.

Otherwise the day passed pleasantly and the moment Wei informed them of Tilwaree-sama's arrival Kia rushed to the entrance. She stopped when she saw her father, he was removing his coat and there were people with him. But then he instinctively looked straight at her and smiled warmly. She ran to give him a hug.

She wasn't sure if she snapped but she held her father a bit tighter than she intended. Her relief and joy at seeing Hiwatari again was starting to make frightening sense to her.

Her father held her equally tight, but by the way he said her name she knew she had worried him. She felt Ryushi walk up behind her and her father released her gently, though he kept his arms round her still, to greet his son.

She grinned at her family as they exchanged greetings, happy in their intimate bubble and for a moment Kia had not a single worry. She slumped, leaning onto her twin and listened to them talk.

"I haven't greeted 'kaa-san yet" she told her father.

"Of course not" he agreed, "We always greet your mother together"

That being said Kia now had a new schedule in her head. They would visit her mother's shrine in the garden together and _then_ Ryushi and she would have her talk. She loved coming back home.

They parted then, to see that the Hiwatari family had already exchanged their own greetings and were waiting to be acknowledged. Kia stepped back and let her brother step forward. He moved to them familiarly and Calica's parents welcomed him with the same warmth. All at once Kia felt out of the picture.

Mr. Hiwatari still emanated a regal and silently intimidating presence that seemed gentler than his son's. Maybe it was the way he stood by his wife with his hand subtly wound round her waist and smiled at his daughters. His wife had aged evidently, but managed to look eternal. She had retained a beautiful sophistication that Kia couldn't help admiring. Elani was talking animatedly to Hiwatari; she was a petite almost teenage girl, with a superior posture that revealed that her greatest influence had been a very arrogant brother.

Finally, when Ryushi had enquired after everyone's health and been teased by Elani-chan, Kia was pulled forward and displayed to the guests. She attempted a wobbly smile, but it came out as an ungraceful grimace. She composed herself.

Mr. Hiwatari and Elani-chan acknowledged her briefly and she answered with grace, but discomfort. She had been excepting too much warmth, but it was Helen Hiwatari's response that made her squirm.

She looked over Kia unsmilingly, as if taking an appraisal. Kia stood for many seconds until after a tense silence she broke her gaze and smiled icily at her son. Kia could only stand obligingly in confusion.

Kia was not the perfect host so when the older woman requested dinner early that evening she could only stutter her consent. They left for their rooms, leaving her alone in the entrance hall to muffle her screams of frustration. Kia, to say the least, was not feeling justified.

Hiwatari-san's coldness was exactly like Hiwatari's had been when she had first met him, without any reason and unexplained. Kia had no reason to be nice to these proud people, Helen and her son could rot in their lack of luxuries for all she cared; but somehow Kia found herself walking sulkily to the kitchen to complain about the changes to the cook.

Helen manipulated the seating so she was centrally placed and able to observe everyone. Kia ignored her attempts to join her in conversation and instead either stayed silent or talked with Hiwatari about things they had already discussed. Therefore, while vigorously being rude and evading Helen-san's hints, she missed her father's penetrating gaze and then her chance to stop him from starting the conversation that would cause unnecessary rifts.

"Have you been taking care of my daughter Hiwatari-kun?" Tilwaree-san spoke across the table conveniently grabbing everyone's attention with the ambiguous question.

Hiwatari who had been paying close attention to his food, looked up startled and unable to speak. Kia, in turn, was so surprised at his speechlessness that even she found herself silent.

"Do Kai and Kia-san know each other?" Calica demanded.

"We worked together briefly" Kia spoke up quickly and sharply, emphasising the last word. Her father opened his mouth to protest but Hiwatari spoke too, in a soft, unbothered tone.

"That is true. I encountered Tilwaree-san when I had gone to collect something from Kia-san's apartment" His words that, as always, had more weight than hers, silenced the matter.

"Nevertheless…"Helen-san cut in smoothly, indicating the conversation was not in fact over until she decided it, "….Kai would have been unfortunately unable to look out for Tilwaree-chan; he has been quite busy recently"

His mother's slow, happy tone left an uneasy feeling and glancing at him, Kia saw Hiwatari tense and pause before carrying on eating normally. Kia couldn't but help feel her curiosity grow; she was desperate for an explanation about his absence. Her mind was diverted however when Helen-san said her name forcefully and loudly, demanding her attention.

"You work at a publishing house, correct Tilwaree-chan?"

Kia confirmed her question reluctantly with a sharp nod.

"I see. I would have assumed you would have entered a career in languages"

"You assumed wrong ma'am. It had always been my intention to work at a publishing house" Kia spoke in a clipped tone that clearly said she didn't care about the other woman's opinions on the matter.

Once again Helen-san proved herself to be Hiwatari's mother by smiling graciously, and then proceeding to look between Kia and Hiwatari, who Kia realised looked unreasonably pissed off. He was about to open his mouth to direct his anger, at her or his mother Kia would never find out, before his father stopped the attempt by smoothly asking Ryushi about his work. Both the Hiwatari and Helen-san settled back with slightly dissatisfied expressions but Kia was delighted with the thinning tension.

The small talk outlasted dinner, after which they moved to the living room. They spoke of the wedding and Kia managed to tune out slightly. As always, the calm could only last so long.

"I think I will have Kai introducing me to a girl soon" his mother turned to him, smiling wickedly. His sister gave a soft gasp while the rest silently waited for a reaction.

"I am oblivious to your suggestion" he informed her, calmly sipping his wine. His mother was not his favourite person tonight.

Helen-san frowned slightly and sat back in her chair. No one was going to interrupt this little exchange, or not so little, as it would turn out to be.

"Are you quite sure? I was told you had taken a partiality to someone" she watched, eyes narrowed, to catch his response.

"Hardly mother" though he replied promptly and dryly, Kia noticed he had tensed slightly and with slight discomfort she felt that Helen's accusation could be true.

Helen Hiwatari turned serious at her son's careless answer. She lifted her chin and regarded him dangerously. Kia saw Hiwatari's head bow slightly in respect and a little apology.

"We visited Sugi-san at the house before coming" she told him and glanced at her husband who Kia saw nod. Hiwatari tensed considerably and placed his glass down slowly.

This family, Kia thought wearily, was too overwhelming for hers. Her brother was very interested in the conversation and her father's smile almost made her think he was in on the cryptic talk; almost, he was concentrating too hard to know everything.

Hiwatari glanced at Kia, who raised her eyes in question. He looked tired again, a bit weary and desperate. Kia almost felt like grinning. She slowly got up and called everyone's attention.

"It is quite late" he voice was not too loud "Father, Ryushi and I need to visit mother's shrine and I think you all would like some time alone as well. Wei is in the kitchen and can get me if you need anything"

She bowed swiftly and looked at Helen-san who was eyeing her. But before she could even glance at her brother a strong, voice spoke up.

"Just sit Kia, we're sorting this out" Her father's involvement surprised her, but Kia obeyed nonetheless. Helen-san turned back to her son, who was still tense, doing little to hide her smug smile.

"What has Sugi-san got to do with this?" Calica asked, but then explained to Ryushi and Kia "She's the housekeeper of our family's house near Tokyo"

Kia felt something heavy drop into he stomach as she quickly lifted her eyes to Hiwatari, he was starting at his mother with apprehension. Helen-san glanced at her daughter and then spoke, clearly enjoying herself.

"Kai tried to sell the house" she stated, extracting a gasp from Calica "And at half the price of what it was worth. He put it on the market, but it was only viewed by one person who thankfully, while I do feel a bit annoyed, refused it"

Here she looked straight at Kia. The girl met her gaze with a steady one of her own, though her head was in turmoil. She sensed Hiwatari about to speak but Helen-san was quicker.

"What was interesting was that the price was only low for this particular client, and he had given firm orders to Sugi-san to abide to any condition this…._girl_ had. Sugi-san was also so bold as to say that she approved of your choice"

Here Helen-san dropped Kia's gaze and smiled sweetly at her son.

"When are you going to introduce her to us Kai?" at that Calica suddenly gasped and called for their attention.

"I just remembered I had called Kai's apartment a couple of months ago and a girl had answered and said he wasn't home, do you think it could be her?!"

If Kia could have groaned, she would have; Hiwatari did, he groaned loudly, shooting her a brief, weary glance for good measure. Kia noticed Ryushi had caught their exchange and looked away quickly; her brother was scowling.

Nothing was said for a few moments. Kia was avoiding trying to think too much but the frightening suggestions didn't seem to get out of her head. She was ecstatic of the fact that Hiwatari had some sort of attraction for her, that had been blatantly obvious while they had been working together, but what Helen-san seemed to suggesting was something she had never even considered. It wasn't that serious, was it?

"Can we have an explanation Kai?" his father spoke softly, but unlike Helen-san, Mr. Hiwatari had clearly laid out a choice for Hiwatari in case he wanted to refuse. The younger man shook his head.

"For goodness sake" his mother cried, "why not? All of us know what's going on anyway!"

"No" Hiwatari said coolly, suddenly very firm "No, not all of us do"

Kia looked around everyone. So they _all_ knew, even her family? She didn't want an explanation unless he was willing to give her one and right now it was quite clear he wasn't. Hiwatari's comment had received many confused looks, mainly from the three parents Kia observed. Helen-san shot her an astonished glance and then with a loud groan, buried her face in her hands while her husband patted her sympathetically.

"What is going on?" Calica echoed Kia's curiosity.

"Mamma didn't know that Kia-san didn't know" Elani supplied helpfully and Hiwatari hissed at her, but his sisters were not to be discouraged.

"What does Kia-chan not know?" Calica questioned further, glancing at the girl in question who was waiting eagerly for a response as well. Hiwatari could not be saved this time.

Elani-chan sighed dramatically "Where Kai's been these past few weeks"

"And where has he been?" Kia hurriedly asked, glancing at the man who now had his eyes closed in resignation.

"With his grandfather" came the surprising reply "Trying to convince him he hasn't lost his mind over his love for you"

"Pardon?" Kia managed to squeak out rather ungracefully.

"He's in love with you" Helen-san removed her hands from her face and spoke loudly, even though she looked quite flustered.

"No he's not" the words tumbled out of Kia's mouth. This extracted even more surprised looks.

"You haven't even told her that!" Helen-san yelled at her son. Hiwatari was looking as if he wanted to kill someone that moment, and he was pointing glares at Kia, which she personally thought to be quite unreasonable.

"You're not in love with me, are you?" she insisted, glaring right back.

"Of course not you idiot" He snarled "I'm only a bit senseless when it comes to you"

"That's right, you just get a bit blown away by my superior intelligence, no?" Ryushi snorted but Kia's fierce expression remained. Hiwatari's eyes softened.

"Tilwaree-san…" he said wistfully, clearly only speaking to her "…Kia, I'm sorry"

Kia turned a flaming red. Suddenly she was shivering violently as she stared at the intense expression on his face; apparently it was serious. Her mind had gone unhelpfully blank so she stumbled to her feet, bowed carefully to everyone who had been watching avidly and then, granting Hiwatari a terrified look, she fled the room for her own.

Thankfully, her brother followed her in.

"What was all that about?" he asked carefully, searching her scared face.

"Didn't the other idiot tell you?"

"No" Ryushi replied with some amusement, waiting patiently. She scrunched up her face.

"I think he was trying to be sarcastic and then he ended up failing"

"Why did he apologise then?"

"Not sure. Maybe he knows it's a bad thing being in love with me, maybe he wanted to tell me himself, maybe he knows how I'm out of my wits right now"

Ryushi scowled "You don't like him, do you?"

"Of course not you idiot. I'm only a bit senseless around him!" Kia mimicked in anger.

"Yeesh" Ryushi snapped back "Don't need to yell at _me_! Then why haven't you told him!"

"In front of everyone! In front of _you_, are you crazy?!" Kia screeched.

"Not really, but I'm sure you are" his patience was running out.

"Why don't you like him?" her brother snapped his head to see her as she fell onto the bed and shut her eyes. His own warmed.

"Who said anything like that?"

"Ryushi" Kia sighed wearily "You were almost growling at the guy when you first saw him this morning and though it took me a while to figure out, I guess you are in a bad mood with me"

"Not really" her brother smiled at her slightly "I was just a bit annoyed that you were keeping secrets from me, that's all. We're all allowed to sulk once in a while"

"So it's fine?" she inquired.

"Kia, you don't really care about my opinion either way. Just sort out whatever's in your head and go have a talk with Hiwatari"

Kia peered at his expression and once she was convinced he wasn't joking she smiled and then proceeded to calm a bit. A twinkle entered her eye and for a moment she looked quite wicked.

"I don't think I will talk to him," she grinned at her brother, "he'll just have to figure it out himself. And either way, I am not confessing in front of our families"

Ryushi sighed and sent out his silent sympathies to Hiwatari. Kia's grin was widening.

"Come now," she ushered, "Let's go collect father and go and greet mother, I've missed her!"

* * *

True to her word, Kia avoided Hiwatari. It was not all that difficult as he seemed to have understood her mission and by keeping himself away, was perfectly obliging. Despite being incredibly curious about the happenings of Kia's brain and possibly, her heart too, the Hiwatari family and Tilwaree-sama did not mention anything about the first evening. Kia's determination to make the holiday go as smoothly as possible was about to be accomplished.

She was sitting next to Elani-chan at the table on a certain occasion and as the girl was now quite willing to get along with her, they chattered carelessly. Then Kia slyly turned the question towards books, eager to know the younger girl's preferences and was much delighted to find out her favourite.

"You like Anastasia Twee's books!" her small squeal caught the attention of the others.

"Yes," gushed Elani-chan, "The stories are really well written and though it's a bit frustrating, I really enjoy how she leaves you hanging and how you have to work out everything on your own"

For the first time in a while, Kia lifted her eyes to meet Hiwatari's to find he was smirking slightly. Kia too had a strong urge to giggle; Elani-chan was still talking.

"Sorry, what was that?" she broke eye-contact with Hiwatari.

"I was jut saying it's a shame she's lonely"

"Lonely? What do you mean?" she was a bit bewildered.

"Well, all her fans on the forums seem to think so. Maybe it comes through her writing or something. I'm not quite sure, you just get that feeling"

Kia blinked at her, unsure of how to answer. Elani-chan dropped the conversation then, concentrating on her food and Kia was grateful of being able to be left to her thoughts again. The conversation continued around, flowing pleasantly and she managed to answer occasionally, but her full attention was not given. Elani-chan's words had intrigued her, but she was not offended by the conclusion. In fact she was impressed by the perception, she had not realised it would show through her work. Then she wondered if, when she published _Death by Crimson_, their view would change.

She swept her eyes over the table, returning to the conversation. Her eyes flickered over Hiwatari and she saw him speaking to his father and Ryushi in low voice, his tone was focused and his expression solemn. Looking away carefully, she couldn't help but frown. Since she had been told of his love, she had watched him many a time to try any catch any sign of it. However, not only did he seem unaffected by her reaction to the revelation, he did not at any time act that what he felt towards her was a little more than affection. It was like trying to pry feelings out of a rock, only Hiwatari was more unfeeling. Kia clearly didn't like this, and it somehow made her feel foolish for wanting more. She frowned darkly and unconsciously glared right at Hiwatari, realizing only when he looked at her and winked.

He winked!

She recoiled in surprise, letting out an offended gasp and blushing. Hiwatari let out a low chuckle which immediately caught Calica-san's attention prompting her to make her own conclusion on the event and squealing. Suddenly Helen-san, Mr. Hiwatari and Tilwaree-sama were all smiling proudly; his two sisters were giggling hysterically, Ryushi was rolling his eyes and Hiwatari was sighing at the hopelessness at the reactions.

Kia turned away, face twisted into an unrelenting frown, but she felt a bit excited, a bit annoyed, a bit happy and, a bit loved.

* * *

**There you go!  
**

**I'm feeling quite insecure about this chapter so I will need reassurance of whether it was effective or not. We'll see them back to their usual routines in the next chapter…or not as usual as it will turn out to be….but everything will fit into place accordingly. Hiwatari just might even oblige us with an explanation!  
**

**So please review, it would make me feel much better regardless of how much you enjoyed or didn't enjoy this chapter!  
**

**Stay safe 'til then!  
**

**Kia**


	7. habits

**Chapter 7**

Hiwatari was home, in Japan, Tokyo and for that he was grateful. The long flight had exhausted him considerably and yet at the thought of seeing Tilwaree-san he wasn't exhausted enough. The drive to her apartment just outside Tokyo Bay was long too but when he reached, he had opened the door and stepped inside swiftly.

There was total silence.

Or so it seemed. Almost immediately after and initial moment of silence Hiwatari heard some sound from inside. Papers shuffling, computer keyboard tapping. Tilwaree-san did not know he was here, yet.

A smirk spread across his face as he placed his bag down and silently removed his shoes. He stepped forward softly towards the study from where the sounds came, grinning as he wondered what her reaction would be to seeing him. It had been over three weeks since they had last seen each other in Osaka at her home and since his confession they hadn't directly spoken to each other either – it would be an interesting meeting. He was almost there now, ready to surprise her, but, of course, Tilwaree-san never cooperated with him.

For it was not her sitting at the table, fiddling in frustration through papers and tapping feverishly away on the computer. It was a man.

Hiwatari felt the excitement wear away, then confusion set in, finally followed very closely by annoyance, a hell of a lot of annoyance.

* * *

Lost sounded hopeless so she used misplaced. Kia was misplaced.

She knew where she was but she didn't know how to return. She was in another's book and she couldn't find her own. This was a bit problematic, frustrating, potentially financially worrying (as her writing suffered) and also very much frightening. It also resulted in her being vague and ambiguous, something she didn't appreciate, but couldn't do anything about either.

The dreams were too….misplaced, or so she hoped. Something she never realised she would hope for.

No inspiration, no books, no passion, no job, no money, no food……it was going somewhere bad.

She was feeling a bit crazy. The bad kind of crazy.

It had been a good idea to take a break, she felt. When Tala had initially thrown her out of her own apartment she hadn't been that pleased but after a relaxing evening with her friends she felt better, less worried, more unperturbed – and she presumed that was good.

* * *

"Who the hell are you?"

The man turned abruptly and straightened, eyes going wide. For a second there was shocked silence before an angry expression graced the man's features and he moved forward threateningly. Hiwatari didn't even flinch.

"What the-? How did you get in?"

Hiwatari's eyes narrowed as he surveyed the stranger "I've got a key, what's your excuse"

* * *

She wondered what he was doing though. He had said he wanted to grab some old documents he knew she had, but she wondered what it was for. She didn't mind him going through her stuff as such only he always left such a mess later on.

Not at all like Hiwatari…..

Kia shook her head; that was one thing she wasn't going to think of. She was close to home now and sleep was sounding very tempting. She hoped Tala had left, they understood each other well but the man never knew when to quit. She could bet that he still hadn't found those documents. He must've helped himself to dinner first before browsing through her new book collection before actually starting to do any work. She smiled affectionately, Tala was always like that.

* * *

"That would be none of your business" the man stated, eyes flashing "I want to know who you are and how you came to be in possession of the key"

"That would be none of _your _business" Hiwatari countered.

"In fact, it would be" the man faced him properly, the blue of his eyes getting paler "You see I own this apartment"

"Bullshit" Hiwatari didn't let his confusion show "Tilwaree-san lives here"

The man's eyebrow rose. "Indeed, Kia lives here, I own it."

Hiwatari didn't fail to notice the intimacy of the address towards the woman but instead of getting frustrated he forced himself to bow his head lightly in acknowledgement that he knew would surprise. Then he stepped back as a gesture to him withdrawing his accusations.

"My apologies" he offered graciously, yet still on guard "I was not aware. I obtained the key with Tilwaree-san's agreement"

The man was silent and watched carefully for a moment cautiously before bowing his head too.

"Understood. May I enquire after your name?"

"Hiwatari Kai, I am….an acquaintance of Tilwaree-san"

"Valkov Tala" he offered a hand "Kia and I have known each other for a long time, if you know what I mean"

* * *

She tried her key but found the door unlocked and rolled her eyes. Tala was being careless. She kicked the door open and stepped in, shrugging off her coat. She placed her bag down and moved to remove her shoes.

"Tala, where are-?"

She paused as her eyes fell on a pair of shoes that stole her voice. She forgot about her shoes and ran in, pushing the door of the study open. There stood Tala, his hand outstretched and with his back to her was Hiwatari. Hiwatari Kai.

"Good evening" she had taken a breath and composed herself before attempting to speak. Tala's eyes sharpened as they rested on her and she noticed Hiwatari's back stiffen as he slowly moved to turn and face her.

"Kia, you're back early" Tala commented, glancing between the two individuals who refused to meet each others eyes.

"And you stayed late" Kia observed dryly, and then spoke after a pause "I assume you've been introduced so why don't we sit in the living room – this place is a bit small"

She turned heel and returned to the hall where she was going to remove her coat and shoes. Hiwatari without another word strode to the kitchen where he retrieved an unopened bottle of wine that had been in the fridge for three weeks. Tala slowly moved to the living room, silently sensing the tension.

When Kia entered the living room Hiwatari was staring at the rim of his wine glass. There was another empty wine glass waiting to be filled and next to it was a can of soda which Kia grabbed appreciatively.

"Did you find the documents Tala?" the man looked up and nodded briefly, his eyes glancing at Hiwatari who hadn't lifted his gaze off his glass.

"They weren't where I'd expected them to be" he explained.

"And did you put everything back where it belonged?" now Tala smiled slightly.

"Hai 'kaa-san. Everything is as you demanded it to be. Anything else?"

"Funny" she stated, with no trace of humour in her voice. Then almost reluctantly she turned to the other man. "How have you been Hiwatari-_san_?"

The pause before she used the honorific did not go unnoticed.

"Fine, Tilwaree-san. I'm sorry to disturb you so late" he replied mildly, not looking at her or sounding at all apologetic. Tala frowned, Kia scowled.

"Not at all Hiwatari" _I'm used to it_. "What have you been doing?"

"I've been working" he offered vaguely and took a languid sip from his glass, finally settling his blank eyes on her. Her scowl became deeper as she tried to figure out his detached answers. The wine in his glass was finishing.

"What do you do Hiwatari-san?" Tala tried, seeing the unexplained frustration on Kia's face.

"I run a business" this time Kia did let out a low hiss and Hiwatari looked almost ready to yawn. Tala couldn't understand the man; only moments ago he had been tense and potentially dangerous – what was the deal with the mood changes?

"Hiwatari…"she started, anxious now.

"Tilwaree-san" Hiwatari spoke her name softly and firmly, drained his glass and stood "I have intruded on you long enough, we will speak another time. I will leave now"

He gave Tala a swift bow which he couldn't even reply to and strode out of the room, leaving behind a totally stunned Kia.

"Shit" she snarled as soon as the door had snapped shut. "Shit"

Looking at her, Tala couldn't help but agree.

* * *

"You've been here before?" Tala asked, more apprehensive about the look on her face than anything else. She had cursed loudly at seeing the restaurant and proceeded to inform him in a very restrained tone that she liked this place. Tala agreed it was very nice but couldn't understand her conflicting emotions, but he didn't ask – he had not been her childhood best friend without acquiring great knowledge about the girl. She was crazy, that was one thing he'd discovered, and it was best not to question it.

She proceeded to get tenser as they approached the restaurant, and as they passed the threshold she even squeezed his arm at one point. Tala was vaguely surprised when they were met by the manager instead of just a waiter. They had been invited to a social gathering and though she had been asked to come along Kia was unsure who the people were; now, however, her suspicions were arousing. Nevertheless, seeing how her over reactive imagination and desires tended to nudge her thoughts in a particular direction, she was mostly disinclined to believe them.

They abandoned the presently open outside of the restaurant, where last time a robust high spirited party had been taking place there were now many individually arranged tables amidst a placid atmosphere. Instead they were led through the familiar beautiful corridors but they stooped before she could relive it all and were ushered into a huge veranda.

It was comfortably stifling she noticed, evading her eyes from its other occupants to quickly give it a brief glance, and it was dimly lit with dappled lamps providing it with an exotic atmosphere. A single large, low table with cushions positioned around it was present with few people already seated and sake cups distributed.

_He _was leaning his back against the railing, face shadowed and, she thought, sinister. Her eyebrows rose further as she noticed the outline of a cigarette between his fingers. Apparently she should have trusted her instincts.

Really, she should have known.

Her slight amused smile directed at the silhouette in the corner did not immediately reassure Tala, but as he had learned to accept her eccentricity he simply led her forward and waited to be introduced. Aurin, who had sprung up at their arrival, presented the two and despite having to pinch Kia to pry her eyes from the man, Tala thought she was passed of as relatively sane.

Ah, the delusions of the world.

They took a seat side by side, a little uncomfortable and out of place and yet starting to feel perfectly at ease. Kia had struck up a conversation with a couple, the woman who worked with Aurin; Tala simply listened in. He was glad she seemed relaxed and she hadn't even once glanced up at the man watching her from the corner, though the other man's gaze was irritating him a bit. Kia, however seemed better than she had in almost a month.

Finally Hiwatari moved and took a seat next to Tala. Though the man tensed at his presence, though he greeted him appropriately, but Kia seemed unaffected and nor did she turn to acknowledge him. Tala wearily wished someone would explain their circumstances to him.

Suddenly Kia turned back to him, and Tala realised that the couple were now conversing with Aurin again. She offered him a smile which he returned and then reached over to try and grab some sake. Tala was going to reach out but a hand caught his sleeve and he turned in confusion to see her eyes focused on the bottle, and now on her knees to be able to reach it on her own. His eyebrows rose in enquiry but she refused to answer.

Finally a pale hand shot out and grabbed the bottle roughly to pass to her. As Kia's fingers brushed Hiwatari's hand she directed a triumphant grin towards Tala. Her friend rolled his eyes and silently sent his sympathies towards Hiwatari. The man proved himself to be already experienced with dealing with the girl as he turned coolly and addressed a bewildered Tala.

"Did you know I detest people without table manners?" Tala frowned, Kia scowled. "And did you also I particularly didn't like the small, wild ones?"

"Uh, no….?" Tala wasn't quite sure what to say as Hiwatari nodded, and balanced his cigarette between his white teeth, moving it this way and that in constant distraction.

"Hmm, what do you do Valkov-san?" the man being addressed could feel Kia's sudden frustration and the way her fingers were tapping the table.

"I'm an architect" he replied warily "I work in a firm situated in Shibuya"

(A.N: Shibuya is a district in Tokyo)

"Yes, we can't all sit at home and work at our own pace; eating, ordering people around, torturing them endlessly, and making them wait to fit our own schedule…."

Tala grinned as Kia's tapping stopped and her finger curled into a fist. She was glaring openly at Hiwatari now, and she leaned round Tala to poke Hiwatari.

"You" poke "don't know half of it!" poke.

"And you definitely would, wouldn't you Tilwaree-san" Hiwatari caught and twisted her finger, making her wince. "Being a famous author and all"

She slammed her other hand onto to mouth, stopping any other flow of information. Tala shifted uncomfortably between them, entangled unwillingly in the discussion.

"Kia is lucky I know about her real job, and Hiwatari-san is lucky she likes you enough to stop me from hitting you" he spoke slowly, with restraint "Now if both of you will agree to stop acting childish and finding excuses to touch each other and just be straightforward, I will leave you two alone to sort each other out. Is that fair?"

Though Kia didn't answer Hiwatari managed an amused sound of affirmation. Sighing softly, Tala moved from between them, conveniently causing Kia to fall forward clumsily into Hiwatari. The man grunted lightly but supported her well enough.

"So," Tala heard Hiwatari trying not to laugh as he addressed the very ungraceful girl, "You were trying to find excuses to touch me?"

"Shut up!" But when he glanced back Tala's eyes narrowed briefly as he saw how tightly the girl was hugging Hiwatari.

Apparently, she had missed him.

* * *

Hiwatari opened the door silently and walked in, dropping his bag on the doorstep. It had been another hard week of work, another week of not returning home and another week of not seeing Tilwaree-san………He had thought he'd be able to see her tonight but it was already too late, so it made sense to just come home.

Tossing his tie on the kitchen worktop, Hiwatari opened the fridge, very intent on finding some of the ready meals he'd put in here for a night like this. However, as he peered inside, about to choose from the many variations he had put in it was only due to being so disorientated that it took longer than a moment for him to realise, that, they were _all _gone.

Instead, in place of them, were many strawberries, various desserts and chocolate. Hiwatari didn't even touch the bitter version of those items.

He was going to kill; no….he was going to _destroy _her!

Slamming the fridge door so it made it shake slightly, Hiwatari stalked to the study where he knew she would be. He made his footsteps loud so that she realised his annoyance. He walked fast as well, secretly anxious to see her, glad that she was there.

He opened the study door quickly, mouth already forming her name, to reprimand her, to tease her, but stopped when he found her lying asleep on the couch.

He sighed loudly, closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance. Hiwatari waited a few seconds until he was in total control of himself before moving forward and lifting her. He adjusted her briefly in his hands, a bit surprised to find her so light and consequently was worried. However, for the moment he just moved through the house until he was in his own room and placed her down on the bed hoping she would be comfortable as she was. He pulled up the sheets and paused as she shifted slightly but when she settled down with a sigh he hastily glanced at her once again and speedily fled from the room.

The girl tested him too much.

"_Where are you?" his strong voice called out loudly to her but she didn't move knowing he would find her, it was a useless question to interrupt the silence; he didn't like the silence._

_She twisted her head a little as she sensed him walk through the balcony doors where she was watching the night time city through the steel railings. When she looked however the curtains just moved in the wind and no one had walked through. Her breath shortened as she continued to watch for a few moments but he didn't walk through. Maybe he hadn't found her yet._

_Uneasy, but determined not to worry, she turned back to the view._

_Black. Blank. _

_She was standing suddenly, wearing a skirt and blouse, but no tights or shoes. It was cold, it was always cold. _

"_Where are you?" she called, but he didn't answer. _

_Of course not, this was payment. She didn't answer so why should he? It made sense to her but she wouldn't look for him. She wrapped her arms around herself and moved forward, her rapidly numbing feet not feeling the scorching cold floor. She blinked._

_No space. No faces._

_Masked people pushed around her. She was dressed in a black costume, black and crimson. They were dancing around her and though she knew the music was loud she could hardly hear it. Pale arms were wound around her chest, smothering her breathing._

"_You're not going anywhere" it was his voice, but it was menacing _

_She struggled against him, pushed and twisted until she was facing him. He was wearing a half mask that fortunately shadowed the sinful eyes, but between the lips that were curved into a frightening smirk was a dangling cigarette with the lit end close enough to burn her skin. Desperately she pushed back as far as she could._

_She had never felt how tall he was, never realise the threat his height, his strength could pose. It was him; it could only be him, for nothing terrified her more. _

_Black. Not again._

_She was running, colder than ever now. In contrast to the heat of his suffocating embrace the cold was unbearable. She fell to her knees under its pressure, scraping the skin off. What was the danger of a cigarette to this?_

"_Where are you?" her voice reverberated, echoing in the open space, bouncing back in amplification mockingly. As the sound died down she lifted her head suddenly. Was that a laugh? _

_She hated the dark; she hated the lack of his presence. It angered her, aggravated her. It reminded her about her incapacities, how she couldn't affect him the way he did her. This was payment, this was hell. It didn't scare her, it disabled her._

_No space. Not again._

_His mask was off, the cigarette was gone. His hold was now around her waist and though it was tight, it was comfortable. She tilted her face upwards and immediately her eyes caught his. She was destroyed._

_She loved his eyes, she loved __**him**__. She couldn't do anything against him, not seriously. He didn't just make her remember her weaknesses he used them, twisted them, distorted and disfigured her strengths until she was undone. His rough lips descended on hers, but his eyes still held her above the surface. It not only disabled her, it killed her._

_Black. Not again…no, no, no……NO!_

Kia woke in cold. She always woke in the cold. In a fumbling manner she reached for her blanket and pulled them up to her neck, sitting up slowly. Slowly as her eyes adjusted to the darkness she moved to get off the bed, not caring where she was, when it was. She needed paper…..

She slid on the cold, smooth floor, but found a lamp. Next to it was an illuminated clock informing her it was only a little after five o'clock in the morning. She glanced around the room, instinctively righting her clothes, noting they were still the ones she had worn last night. She must have forgotten to go home. She found the door and moved towards the study, opening the door quickly and entering and grabbing the first piece of free paper she saw.

The pencil she was using scratched loudly as she noted down her dream. At some points she trembled but it was all recorded how she had seen it. Inspiration was back, she noted bitterly. Finally finishing with a sigh she folded the paper carefully and moved to place it safely in her bag. As she twisted to look for it, her eyes caught his. She wisely looked away. She would not be undone.

"Good morning" he said quietly, voice soft and slightly gruff. She nodded briefly in reply, offering him a smile. "You're up early?"

"Dream" she explained vaguely, still not looking, not realising how he stiffened and was suddenly wide awake.

"You have nightmares often?" he asked, an example of casualness. She looked at him sharply.

"Nightmares? I never have nightmares" she said, confused "My dreams are just a bit….unusual; though these days they're very good for inspiration. It's all a little weird"

Hiwatari nodded, pretending to understand and then collapsed back into the couch again. He'd slept there last night. Suddenly his eyes narrowed.

"Why don't you go freshen up? I'm sure I have some clothes that'll fit you. I'll get together something to eat." Now he fixed her with a solid gaze "Then we can talk"

Kia's head snapped up to look at him. Her eyes widened slightly but she managed to nod. Grabbing her bag and stuffing in the paper she quickly got up and went out of the room. Hiwatari glared at the bag, his hand inching towards it, but he stilled himself.

"Later," he muttered, "later"

When Kia arrived in the kitchen, she found Hiwatari wasn't there yet. She used this time to fuss around with the dress she assumed to be Calica-san's. She didn't particularly like it and it was not immediately comfortable, but she didn't want to complain. As she was taking a seat at one of the highchairs Hiwatari entered. She glanced at him and averted her eyes immediately. He looked nice.

Grinning slightly at her embarrassment, Hiwatari opened the fridge to prepare something and then frowned, scowled, then glared. He turned around.

"Did you eat all my food?"

"You didn't tell me when you were coming back so I came here every evening. You didn't have much to eat" she commented as lightly as she could manage.

"Then I guess we're not eating then, so we can skip to the talking part"

"Talking!" she yelled in wild panic "What would we have to talk about? How - I mean – why would we-?!"

"I know about your dreams"

"What dreams?" she asked with such innocent confusion that he almost believed her. What was he basing this upon, a story to a child? She did have a knack for that. There was no harm in confirming.

"The dreams that you have about me, Tilwaree-san"

"I am at loss Hiwatari" she said, adopting a telling, formal tone "I have no inclination of what you speak"

He just stared at her, one eyebrow raised until she faltered slightly.

"Explain"

"I overheard you telling Elani-chan when you were staying with us in Moscow"

Her eyes widened fractionally and she lost all her colouring. He opened his mouth to speak but she was first.

"Shut up" her voice was hard "Do not even dare to say a word!"

He obliged, watching her warily as she stumbled onto a chair and buried her hair in her hands. The silence continued, tightening its hold around him slowly but he obliged waiting patiently.

"I don't have nightmares anymore, but I used to you know, in Moscow, before Moscow, after Moscow" she paused "Why did you tell me?"

He did not waste a moment. She was too stunned to interrupt at the moment so she wouldn't ask questions; he knew he had upset her but this was the best opportunity.

"The first time I saw you in Tokyo was a month before I was assigned as your editor" he paused to see if she would speak, she didn't "I didn't know what you did, just who you were Tilwaree-san, and I couldn't help but be curious. I had to come in a lot because I was due to be leaving soon and I saw you every time, often speaking to Tsukishiro-san and I guess I assumed what you did. It was risk and I wasn't quite sure what I was doing. The days had been moving so fast that all my decisions were made without thinking; I had already persuaded myself that it wasn't you but you were there proving me wrong again, no cooperation at all"

"And why did you want to become my editor?" her voice was soft.

"I was curious Tilwaree-san, only curious about you. Maybe it was the sudden realisation that the few months I had left to myself before I had to start working again would move too slowly for me, I realised I needed something to occupy me"

"Occupy you?" she twitched slightly, retracting herself from her arms, sitting straighter. He gave a grunt of confirmation before continuing.

"I hadn't anticipated spending so much time with you, getting so _involved_, not worrying about making mistakes and then actually making the mistake. I had been saved the last time when you left, but this time you wouldn't go away. You know what I think Tilwaree-san? I think you've poisoned me"

"I think you need some coffee!" she yelled "You're ranting like a madman! Does it not bother you that I've been having dreams about you?!"

"Why?" he asked lightly, face serious "Are they perverted?"

"That's it!" she was getting violent now "I'm leaving. When you're awake enough to speak sense, come see me and we'll have that talk!"

As she tried to pass him, Hiwatari stepped in front of her and grabbed her elbows tightly.

"You're not going anywhere" he whispered.

Kia's eyes widened and she somehow avoided going limp, but her eyes were already caught in his. Still the strong grip on her elbows kept her sane.

"I didn't mean to leave without saying anything" he spoke quickly, noticing her panic "I was only unsure of what to say. My grandfather has resigned his company over to me and I was initially busy. I was coming to see you but I didn't know we were going to meet at your house and I hadn't wanted…..I didn't want you to find out like that"

"Find out like what?" she managed to mutter.

"With my mother there, testing you at everything and with everyone being presumptuous and especially making you look stupid in front of them….."

"So I did look stupid?" she asked a bit testily, hoping he'd recognize the threat in her tone; he didn't.

"You did" a smirk crept onto his face "You were trembling like a little baby when Elani-chan told you, like you didn't believe her"

"I didn't believe her" Kia answered "I don't think I believe you either"

His smirk widened and he let her go and she felt strange having said it.

"I'm not going to convince you" he warned.

Kia nodded, unsure now. At the moment she didn't like him. She loved him, but didn't like him. At the moment he made her feel uncomfortable, frightened. She moved past him and when she returned with her things he was leaning against the counter, smoking. The lit end of the cigarette gleamed at her.

"I bought some cereal, it's in the cupboard and there should be some bread in there as well. Eat it" giving him another distressed, uncertain glance she turned away from his amused face to walk out of his house. She was going back to her apartment.

Just as she reached the door he spoke.

"Can you pick up some take-away when you come home tomorrow, I'm going to be late"

Kia paused in her exit; he wasn't going to chase her, but he didn't need to because she wouldn't go away. She wished he would chase her. Kia left, Hiwatari let out a chuckle.

* * *

He wasn't home when she came the next evening. She had stopped by her apartment first so she was a little bit later than usual and she had expected him to be back already. She started worrying a little. Eventually, leaving the take-away in the fridge, and a note on the table to tell she had come, Kia left. She didn't come back the next day, but she came the day after that.

The food in the fridge had disappeared and she replaced it with ready meals, knowing he wouldn't go shopping. She didn't think he would come home tonight but she still retired to the study with her notebook, thinking that she ought to get on with her writing.

In the end she didn't end up writing at all. She just curled up at one corner of the room, staring out of the glass into the bright city. Her notebook and pen lay neatly next to her, but untouched. It was time to think.

She was unsure of what the problem was, she was unsure of whether there was even a problem or not but it was as if she was at an unknown obstacle, with no idea, no original creativity on how to surpass it. Maybe it was linked to Hiwatari, maybe only to her.

Okay, it was definitely linked to Hiwatari. Hell, it _was _Hiwatari.

Good, Kia thought silently, trying not to feel insane, at least now she knew what the problem was.

So Hiwatari had told her he loved her, or something to that extent, and she loved him, so what was the problem? She didn't like him, not right now, and she was having problems understanding him. What did he want from her?

Hiwatari frightened her, because she knew, she _knew_, that despite the gentlemanly exterior that he put up, despite his polite words when he didn't have the strength, when he had worked too much, the formality started slipping. He became like a restrained sadist, enjoyed mocking her, teasing her and the only problem was that _she _let it get to her. In her imagination Hiwatari was _only _nice, sweet, gentle – he was the one with crimson eyes, not the one that scared her.

But still although the thought of _him _scared her the thought of his absence made her helpless. That was when she truly didn't know what to do. Like now.

Her head snapped up as she suddenly heard the door open. She was quickly on her feet and moving towards the entrance, but she paused when behind Hiwatari entered another woman and a child.

"Aurin-chan" Kia greeted, avoiding Hiwatari's eyes as they passed briefly over her "How are you?"

"Kia-chan!" Aurin exclaimed as she set the little boy down, he looked about four or five "How nice to see you!"

They exchanged pleasantries while Hiwatari stood to the side, watching but not too closely. Aurin-chan then introduced the boy to Kia as her son, Shuro.

"I wasn't aware you had a son Aurin-chan!" Kia said, smiling at the boy as he grinned back sleepily.

"You also haven't met my husband. You will have to come over and visit one day Kia-chan!"

She agreed, and Aurin-chan rushed to say her good-byes. She had to go out of the city that evening and as her husband wasn't home either, Hiwatari was looking after Shuro-kun till the next day. In a conspiring whisper Aurin requested Kia to stay until Shuro-kun was asleep because apparently Hiwatari was not good with children. Kia initially didn't believe her but when the three were alone together, Hiwatari looked so uncomfortable that Kia couldn't help but laugh.

He glared at her, but surprisingly his cheeks were a bit rosy clearly informing her of his embarrassment. She was surprised; he had always been so good with Elani-chan.

Still smiling she kneeled down and helped the shy Shuro-kun out of his coat and shoes. Hiwatari told her he had already eaten at Aurin's house and she nodded absently, too focused on the younger boy to pay attention. Hiwatari scowled.

The boy took her attention most of the evening, smiling shyly and talking cutely and Kia couldn't help but coo and smother him. She was happy for the distraction and even liked the boy a lot. Hiwatari had needn't worried himself because Kia made sure Shuro-kun and she were well out of his way for the evening. She didn't mind that it was quite late, she didn't mind that Shuro-kun stayed up well after his bedtime, for the moment she was content.

After the little boy ad been tucked in and she had made sure that he was truly asleep, she returned to the study to collect her things and inform Hiwatari that she was leaving.

When she entered Kia was well aware that Hiwatari was watching her. He waited until he was sue that Shuro-kun was not going to follow her in and in a swift movement that she had little time to detect, he got off the couch and grabbed her.

"Hiwatari! What-?!"

She was smoothly and abruptly cut off as his lips landed on hers. It was a shock and she couldn't respond as he tilted her head back and put hard pressure on her lips. She was frozen as his cold, cold lips manoeuvred over hers and she didn't know what to do. Suddenly he pulled back and she stared up, astonished, into his eyes.

The crimson had darkened almost into a reddish-brown. Kia had never seen that colour and though it wasn't the death inducing crimson, it was predatory.

"Hiwatari?" she questioned weakly.

He did not reply, only roughly claimed her lips again, this time nibbling expertly on the bottom lip, demanding response. Her body was pulled closer and lifted slightly as he supported her. Slowly, Kia felt warmed and she tentatively kissed him back, adding more force as she felt him smirk against her lips.

He grinned as he separated and she leaned in, wanting more, wanting _him_. He smirked, grazing his lips over her cheek, breathing into her ear, holding her closely. She eventually regained her breath and tilted her head back to look at him; there was no amusement on his face.

"I thought you weren't trying to convince me" she raised a brow, acting as if this kind of thing happened all the time. His smirk returned and she felt more comfortable.

"That was not about convincing you Tilwaree-san, that was for me" he said, resting his forehead on hers.

She stayed silent contemplating his words, looking at the buttons of his shirt because her neck hurt too much from looking up. He was too tall. He hadn't released her yet and she wondered why. Exhaustion was creeping up and this point she didn't want the headache, she didn't dare think about the consequences. She didn't care _at all_.

He tugged her backwards and changed his grip as he pulled her onto the couch. She came willingly, tiredly, unthinkingly. She wasn't quite sure how things progressed next.

* * *

**Yes, I know. Totally crap chapter. You can blame lack of ideas, an incredibly inconvenient, **_**horrid, **_**writer's block and again, lack of ideas. **

_**Why Do I Care **_**is suffering from the same symptoms but I'll work something out.**

**Kia**


	8. comfort

**Chapter 8 **

Kia was pacing when Hiwatari entered, exhausted and yearning for a quiet evening. His entrance caused her to stop so he assumed she had not wanted him to see her frustration and this was confirmed as she disappeared into the house after giving him a brief nod. He wondered how she possessed the energy, after a long day of hard work, to still spend some more on worrying over things. Then he realised, with a slight, totally justified bitterness, that she didn't work hard and that her frustration wasn't entirely undeserved. He just wished she would admit it to herself.

When she returned to the front of the house later, she was on the phone to her editor, Mika Tsukishiro, and their argument, Hiwatari noted again with slight satisfaction, wasn't going well. Kia, as if recognising his sentiments and he was in no doubt that she had, scowled and hissed into the phone with added vehemence. The conversation finished shortly and Kia turned away from him, scrounging for some food. The silence clawed the tension in the room.

Hiwatari, it must be said, wasn't a great fan of silence, and this being so he felt the need to move, to create some noise by fiddling around the kitchen aimlessly, searching for certain pieces of cutlery, pouring a glass of wine, anything apart from the silence. It successfully aggravated Kia's nerves and she turned on him. Hiwatari relished that this time he could point out it was not he who started the argument.

"Do you need something?" she asked with great difficulty.

"What did Tsukishiro-san say?" he asked, sipping from his glass expertly. Her expression contorted, and she looked away. He wondered if he should feel bad at distressing her.

"Why do you want to know?"

He sighed, and it was a telling sigh. It was the kind an adult gave to a child when they were being difficult. Kia understood it, but disregarded it. Hiwatari was well known to her now.

"Tilwaree-san" he spoke condemningly, leaving irritating implications in his tone, but Kia was composed. She faced him with a raised eyebrow, challenging.

"No" she said "You have no right to know, as you had no right to read my personal notes. My editor is allowed to assist me but you have lost that privilege, upon your own choosing"

"What did Tsukishiro-san say?" Hiwatari stood straighter now, moving closer, with a harder tone. It was a command; Kia smiled bitterly.

"You are not going to find out, and how does it matter anyway? You have the victory nevertheless"

"It's not about victory, which is acknowledged by the way, but necessity" he would not express his concern, he was adamant in that. The misunderstanding would consequently persist.

"Why would it be necessary for you to know?" genuine hope was laced in her bitter tone "Hiwatari I get the point, I know you are right, I'm _not_ writing it anymore!"

"_What did she say?_"

Kia refused to look at him, but Hiwatari's hand, which had encircled her wrist, tightened warningly. She closed her eyes.

"She agrees" she said and he let her go. The sudden release felt sharply warm and cold simultaneously. Then again, in the next instant, it was in his grip again, only now he was caressing it, as if in apology, but it wasn't in admission of guilt.

"Are you happy now?" she asked fiercely, his endearments galling her. He smirked slightly in amused contemplation.

"You are taking this too hard" he protested.

"And I shouldn't?" she asked, shocked "And I should not? I spent nearly a year writing that book! Only that! Are you saying I shouldn't be even a bit disheartened, not even feel bad a little?!"

She challenged him as he stared at her, blank once again. She willed him to understand her but he didn't respond.

"You might be right, I haven't denied that. In fact you are right, but that does not mean you had any right to mock me like that. Surely there is a degree of politeness required no matter what our relationship. _Death by Crimson _was a bad idea; maybe it was a terrible one. Maybe, yes, I did only do it just under the pretence of working and I did really want a break, but _so what_? How does it matter to you if I take a break when I can, clearly, afford to?"

She waited, remained only for a response, a confession, a consolation.

"I assure you I did not need to be told of the deterioration of my writing, especially in the untactful way you proceeded to tell me. I refuse to be treated like inferiority"

She would have turned around and gone away but she saw Hiwatari's jaw tightening, his lips twitching and again rage flared through her. She watched him with outrage as he raised a disbelieving eyebrow at her spectacle and counted to a high number. She looked back at his patient face, consistent with its ridicule, and mirrored his expression of disdain.

"And remember Hiwatari" she reminded him sweetly "you still haven't convinced me yet"

* * *

The tension had lasted a week. It was still Kia's weakness, one she would not consider, to see him as much as possible. Their lifestyle continued in the same way but also, obviously, not so same.

They would acknowledge each other, and yet not talk so that silence ruled their time. Kia, after wandering aimlessly for many evenings, attempting to write, had settled upon light reading. Anastasia Twee was _(and had been)_ on a (hopefully, the public thought) temporary holiday. It was at the end of this tireless week that confrontation was suddenly required, or rather brought forward.

It is necessary to realise that Hiwatari's constitution had changed gradually over the days, and had Kia been paying attention maybe she might have been more prepared for the revelation. It, his mood effectively, had become bitter, pensive, accusing. There was a fundamental concept that he couldn't accept and it was making him increasingly concerned and disturbed.

Kia Tilwaree was _(and had been)_ blatantly lying.

While the occurrence was not so shocking in itself, for everyone lies, it was more the circumstance and the conviction with which she did it. So on the occasion when Hiwatari had quite had enough, so to speak, he quietly questioned her, despite her indication of not wanting to interact with him

"Do you really think I believe you?" Kia answered only because of curiosity. Hiwatari's eyes seemed sharp as if he had been thinking about this for a long time and was only continuing the conversation in his head.

"You need to tell me what you're talking about first Hiwatari" her admonishing tone shook him more and he wondered how her conscience allowed her to uptake it.

"The little tantrum you threw a week ago, do you think I really believe any of it was genuine?" he said in a strange tone. Her expression did not change.

"Are you suggesting," she asked, a bit dangerously "that I made all that up? And for what, if I may have your opinion?"

"For dramatisation" Hiwatari suggested, with a mild, acid smile "maybe just for the sake of it – to blame someone. Possibly, to not admit to feeling useless, or to make sense of those dreams. Even, perhaps a little bit, as an excuse to spend time with me. You weren't writing that damn book, you were using it. Yes, I am suggesting, probably telling you, that you made the whole thing up, because Tilwaree-san you did!"

His words had no effect on the girl, her expression looked politely bored.

"And what disturbs me is not that you did it, which was natural human defence, but that you did it so comfortably. Am I anticipating a relationship where one lies so confidently, without any guilt?"

Hiwatari would have silently retracted his deductions had she replied fiercely, but her stony silence made him face her with equal conviction. She hadn't denied it. The silence lengthened and lengthened, stretching in a conscious way that made each of them weary in different senses. Hiwatari couldn't stand it too long.

"Are you going to say anything?" he said, predicting the same refusal, for Kia, as prideful as he, would not admit to a weakness. But she spoke:

"It is," she admitted with great effort "It is very, very difficult to stay at pace with you"

"Are you admitting you inferiority then?" his tone was almost light. Her face did not soften, nor did his sentiments.

"You don't understand" she persisted "it's not impossible for you to believe I'm flawed because I am, but you just take things with such grace that…that…"

"Stop fishing for compliments Kia!" he said harshly "And stop acting so self-pitiful!"

Her eyes flared with sudden anger and she stood up from where she had been curled up, reading. Her restraint was going.

"Fine!" she "I don't really care that most of last year has been spent doing nothing. It doesn't matter because I haven't lost anything substantial. _Death by Crimson _was a farce. Is that what you wanted me to admit? Well, it's done now!"

Hiwatari stayed silence, not being able to respond to her outburst. She scowled at him and sat down again, reclaiming her book.

"I'm not a child Hiwatari, though I do make my mistakes. I'm not unblemished as you are. If you can't deal with me, tell me so, don't provoke me into proving it. I can deal with my own problems and I do know when and how I'm required to do my work"

Hiwatari nodded, still unnervingly unresponsive. He leaned back on the couch and turned away from her, somewhat resigned. Kia's book lay abandoned on her lap as she watched him, contemplating, pondering and guilt seeped through her, clashing with the frustration she felt against him. But she would not admit to her mistake, she would only silently try to repent it.

As silence once again encompassed the house, it was almost as if she was already being punished, being pushed a little farther from him than she had been, with an inconceivable gap in between.

Hiwatari's attitude to this was better concealed, and though his concern only went so far (not too far along) it heightened when, upon returning home one night he did not find Kia there.

Again, this was not unusual, but since their argument conversation was limited, and yet Kia always came to make up for it through her presence. He was not sure if he was permitted to call and enquire upon her plans or whether he should ignore it. He ignored it, at first. Two days on, he decided to risk ringing her, but upon receiving no reply, he decided to investigate and ventured into her apartment that evening. The lack of her presence received him. Hiwatari was not happy.

He first hunted for a note, or any vague message, even asking his secretary if a strange, wild girl had left one for him. Then he asked her editor, who said she did not know, but would inform him if she found out and lastly, finally, he rang Tala Valkov. Her friend listened to his predicament, questioned if he was particularly busy and then persuaded him, through the withholding of information, to meet up with him.

"Where is she?" he asked, as way of greeting as he calmly sat down opposite the young man, his anxiety not betrayed on his expression, nor his tone, but rather in the way his hands formed tight fists.

"Drink something first"

"Valkov-san, I would rather-"

"I don't know where she is" he deadpanned.

Hiwatari stared at Tala, who only poured him some wine politely, and was silent in his shock, but then as he began to speak again he was once again interrupted.

"She does this a lot, you should realise" he said, calming the man "she does it every time she has any idea for a book. She disappears without telling anyone to go start it off in peace. It was strange she didn't do it for her last book though"

Hiwatari sighed wearily, grabbing the glass of wine to take a long sip. The girl was going to be the death of him.

"She doesn't tell anyone?" he confirmed, and saw Valkov smile.

"She does tell one person, but he won't say anything even at the threat to his life"

"Who?" but he already knew.

"Ryushi, of course"

Hiwatari nodded, taking the information in, and the men ended up having dinner together. The conversation often did not stray very far from the girl but at the end of it Hiwatari decided he didn't mind Valkov so much.

That night, Hiwatari glanced indecisively at the phone. He wasn't particularly acquainted with Ryushi, despite his sister's engagement to him, and he knew the brother's loyalty to his sister, but it was worth a try. He rang them up, Calica answered.

"Kai!" she exclaimed "How are you? I haven't heard from you in such a long while! Mother was saying she was going to call you soon, did she....You want to speak to Ryushi? Alright, but you must talk to me later as well. Here you go. I'm giving it to him"

There was silence for a moment, he heard his sister tell Ryushi to 'be nice' before the man's own voice reverberated down the line.

"Good evening Tilwaree-san" Hiwatari spoke politely "I trust I am not disturbing"

"Not at all" he sounded amused "I am assuming you want to ask about Kia"

Hiwatari responded in silence. Maybe Ryushi chuckled softly.

"Give it a day or two, Hiwatari-san, she'll be back. Do not worry either, she does it a lot"

"Did she say anything when you spoke to her?" Hiwatari asked hesitantly.

"She did, but I believe she was only sulking, she does that a lot as well. Kia has the tendency to act childish about things when she's troubled and while I realise that isn't your problem I would request you to be patient with her. However, she's better now that she's got work to do, I apologise if she caused trouble"

Hiwatari was not happy with the explanation and he was a little off put with the apology as he did not believe Kia would appreciate it either. She was, as she had reminded him, responsible for herself, but he let it off as a brother's over protectiveness. He thanked Ryushi-san, and the phone was passed back to an eager Calica, who chattered on happily. Hiwatari's heart continued to thump, troubled.

Four days later, when Hiwatari came home he saw a pair of shoes and a coat and a bag at the entrance and he moved swiftly to the study room. Sure enough, Kia lay on the couch, sleeping deeply. He moved towards her, but wouldn't touch her and then, in some degree of anger (at himself and her), reached out to touch her face. Somehow his hand was gentle as it caressed her cheek and smoothed her hair.

Sitting next to her, Hiwatari gathered her in his arms embracing her and settling next to her. She shifted next to him, eyes fluttering slightly, but he soothed her and she remained asleep. He watched her for a few moments before burying his face in her hair, his heart slowing with an unknown relief and a deep sigh escaping his lips.

Consequences be damned.

* * *

Waking up was the worst part, always, and it was a truth Kia had come to terms with a long time ago. The morning always managed to become an effort, and that it was such for many people made her feel common. Kia had issues with being unexceptional. She refused to open her eyes and settled into her cocoon with further intentions of going back to sleep, but cold lips brushed over her forehead and eyes; she stiffened.

"Good morning" warm breath tickled her ear and she shivered, but her eyes wouldn't open. She didn't respond, instead she shifted in his arms and traced his face with her fingers, covering his closed lids and then opening hers slowly. He was beautiful.

His face was inches from hers and yet she couldn't see any blemishes (though she was willing to blame that on her sleepy constitution) and somehow, their intimacy made her feel incredibly secure. She turned so she was facing him properly, suddenly aware of their tangled legs and his body pressed against hers. Immediately she stopped moving, clasping tighter onto where she was grasping his shirt and burying her burning face into his neck. His smooth, cold fingers combed through her short hair and he let out a small sigh, snaking an arm around her waist.

"If I'm not mistaken" she said slowly "you were not here when I went to sleep last night"

"If I'm not mistaken, you've been gone for a week without telling me" she winced and his grip tightened.

"You'll have to get used to it if you plan to stick around" she managed to reply, and he scoffed softly, abandoning her hair and wrapping his arms around her properly. Suddenly she stiffened.

"Shit" she muttered, shifting nervously "What time is it? I need to go into-!"

"You're not going anywhere" he said firmly, pressing his lips to her hair, holding down her protests. "I'm not going to let go of you for a while"

"Hiwatari…" her voice sounded mildly threatening, but she had settled. He simply repeated his objection. They stayed quiet for a short while before she shifted once again so she could look at his face comfortably.

"What did you do while I was gone?"

"I do have a life you know…"

"Could have fooled me" she muttered, extracting a smirk from him. She smiled back, her eyes still a bit foggy but then almost instantaneously her lips twitched downwards and she looked away.

"You know…." She started hesitantly, holding on tightly to his shirt "I…that is, what I mean is, I'm a bit….ashamed, I guess. I acted a bit childishly"

Hiwatari stayed silent, her eyes turned back to his, alert and fierce.

"That's not to say I didn't mean what I said" she insisted "I don't just say things, but I'll make sure they're a bit more genuine from now on"

She was now looking at him expectantly; he smiled proudly. She was catching on to the manipulation fast.

"Very well," he conceded "I also believe my behaviour was insensitive and intrusive. Next time I'll inform you before I mock you"

She laughed and then shifted, _again_, only this time she moved away from him. Hiwatari's arms had loosened slightly and she took this opportunity to prop herself up on her knees, ready to move away, when she saw his expression.

Her smile widened, which was not what he had expected, and it was tender as well, when she closed her eyes and briefly brushed her lips against his. She almost didn't escape.

"Please don't mind, I'm using your shower!" she called as she fled to the bathroom. Hiwatari remained still on the couch for many moments before he cursed under his breath and got up as well to get dressed.

It had gone better than expected; she hadn't even hit him.

Kia had beaten him to the bathroom in his room, but even after he had got dressed she was still having a shower. He didn't mind so much at first, simply lounging on his bed so he would catch her off guard when she came out, but when the door did open Hiwatari wondered if it had been a good idea.

Kia stepped out obliviously, donned in only a towel that was wrapped around her torso, leaving her shoulders bare, and fell till just above her knees. Her short, wet hair hung unusually straight, dripping slightly onto her flushed skin. Hiwatari's eyebrows rose, but he didn't speak, unconcerned enough to take in the sight for as long as she would allow. Unfortunately for him, Kia turned around and spotted him at that moment, but surprisingly she merely blinked.

"Hello" she said, almost unconsciously, a smile breaking onto her face. Hiwatari nodded in reply, silently wondering if the warm steam had messed with her head or something or whether this was her pathetic attempt at seducing him. When she failed to seem concerned or embarrassed (which he had been certain of), Hiwatari's eyebrows crept higher and she frowned at his steady gaze.

"Haven't you seen a female before?" she asked him in irritation. He smirked. He was not about to admit that her audacity surprised him, because he doubted it was on purpose and suggesting that maybe now she trusted him more would make it known that he had thought previously she had trusted him less. Instead he got up and approached her silently, making sure he stood close enough to intimidate her.

"Hiwatari…?" she said warningly, leaning backwards. He did not respond.

He focused on her eyes as he leant down and kissed her, not holding her or touching her in any other way. She received his chaste kiss without protest and responded slightly. He lifted his head and she held his gaze questioningly but his eyes flickered away from hers, to her lips and then lower and his smirk widened and he assaulted her mouth again, probing deeper.

He leaned his arms on the wall on either side of her head, again making sure not to touch her only kissing her more insistently. Kia trembled lightly, attempting to respond with equal vigour, but somehow, due its strength, its intensity and without his arms supporting her she felt incredibly tense and weak. Furthermore, with his body so close, it made her more aware of him and the temptation to lean into him was almost overwhelming. She disengaged her lips from his and fell back onto the wall. He was smirking at her now.

She turned her face away from his, a slightly goofy grin creeping onto her face. He chuckled and leaned to whisper in her ear. His closeness distracted her and she didn't hear what he said, but then, suddenly, Kia was shaken. Hiwatari leaned down and pressed an open mouth kiss, touching the spot on her neck where her pulse could be felt.

In an immediate, impulsive, involuntary action Kia pushed him back hard, hitting him in a sensitive area as well, so that, though he didn't get pushed very far, the wind was knocked out of his lungs. When he looked back up she had grabbed her towel with one hand, securing it to her body and the other was holding the spot he had kissed. Her eyes were shut tightly and her face reflected great disturbance. Contrary to even what he thought, Hiwatari was neither offended nor angry, he was simply greatly surprised.

"Hiwatari!" Kia almost shouted, curling into herself while rubbing her neck. She leaned against the wall and banged the back of her head against the wall twice; she seemed to be under some sort of frustration.

"God damn it, idiot!" she continued, much to his astonishment "I'm never going to recover from this!"

She caught his confused expression and immediately her face became red. She tried to evade him but he caught her shoulders and asked her what was wrong, she was almost jumping up and down.

"It's a sensitive spot!" she managed to wring out "And it's ticklish, and it still tickles!"

Hiwatari stared at her for a few moments and then laughed loudly, pulling her to him in an affectionate hug. She was still fidgeting, but he continued to laugh and hold her tightly, pressing kisses to her hair and face and neck.

* * *

Kia had never really had any concept of love because there had always been other things that were more important – her studies, her writing, her job. She had always had this intense desire to be running throughout life, to never slowdown and enjoy the moment, but to touch everything no matter how briefly. She believed, later, tomorrow, in the next stage, things would automatically slow down because of this and that she would instantly stop worrying about that. Things were somehow idealised illusions and dreams were reality. She had something she lived for, something that she did for herself and no one else. Something she excelled at, but somehow the shadow of her life was diminishing the brilliance and Kia had only just noticed.

When she was at school Kia had received grades that had been above average, almost close to brilliant, despite having written a book on the side. However it was that _almost_ that haunted her and at the same time gave her confidence. If she was that good without the effort what was the point of the effort, right? No one would know, so she wouldn't have to care.

She was older, more mature, but not fully confident when a strange thought had struck her. Nothing was _really _going to change, was it? She was still going to have petty arguments with friends, and she was still going to argue with her family over basic domesticities, she was still going to find things difficult no matter how much she studied. It was like school, when you're younger you feel a certain sense of awe for the older students but when you each that level you don't feel anything about yourself inspires that awe – in essence not much has altered, but then there's that argument of what makes one themselves.

Kia was waiting for something to change with Hiwatari, waiting for something significant to happen. How did relationships develop from frivolous to serious? When do you know its love? Hiwatari wasn't going to alter himself but sometimes she felt she just didn't know enough about him and then she wondered if she needed to. Kia, like every other human on the planet, wanted ultimate happiness, but she wondered now if that was possible. There was a strange restlessness in her that didn't disappear because she didn't know it was there, and not identifying it, not specifying it, was creating such turmoil for her that she failed to express it. What was the girl waiting for? When was she going to get what she wanted, whatever it was she wanted?

Hiwatari was waiting in her apartment one evening, straight after work, continuing the papers that had overflowed on the day. Kia had rather informed him, with unknown defiance, that she was spending the evening with her friends. Hiwatari did not waste any time pondering over her strange emotions but he couldn't help but feel a bit pitiful simply waiting. It was with contradictory feelings of relief and trepidation that he received her phone call informing him that she was on her way back.

He heard her enter soon after, in the distance because he was once more absorbed into his work. She passed by the living room, where he was working, into her bedroom, calling a brief greeting that he did not reply to. It was a strange and soothing, just having her present there and calming for she wasn't talking. Through his peripheral vision he saw her peek into the room and smile, but again she did not say a word as she came and sat down next to him on the floor, reclining against the couch with a book in her hands.

As he worked he would look at her, and he got a bit irritated with the distraction, but he would try and pay attention too. Kia, who was already near the end of her book, finished it soon and she stared ahead of her at the white, white wall and it was only then Hiwatari noticed that her face was strangely ashen. She was stiff and looked incredibly difficult to read. Hiwatari couldn't help but lean into to her.

"Are you alright?" he felt silly being gentle, but somehow he couldn't stop himself. She jumped and turned to face him, her face lighting up with a weak smile.

"Yes" a pause, then "of course"

"You don't have to be" he joked "Break down and cry if you want"

He was surprised when her lips straightened a bit and her face loosened, slackened into grief. She dropped her head onto his shoulder. Quickly pushing his papers away he embraced her uncomfortably.

"Tilwaree-san?" he did not know what to do.

She wrapped her arms around him and pulled herself closer. It was almost as if she was trying to hide in his warmth. _He didn't know what to do._

Hiwatari had never really been totally helpless. It was, he consoled himself, partly her fault because he didn't know what was wrong, but something was troubling him, dogging him relentlessly to somehow, _anyhow_, do something. Anything.

She was still tense and as he relaxed, willed his mind not to panic and remembered how she overreacted, HIwatari realised that she too, might be reluctant. What incentive was there for her to tell him? Kia had pride too, _that _he knew very well.

"Talk to me Tilwaree-san" he demanded, softly with superiority. He felt her relax as she bristled under the familiar frustration of his arrogance.

"The book is really good" she said and he had to blink and remember to think like her.

"And is it really sad?"

"Yes" she said, "It's based on the author's true experiences as well. It's…..beautiful Hiwatari, it's really, _really good_"

"You picked a good book then" she pushed herself away and she was smiling up at him with a tired, helpless, sad smile.

"I did" she agreed and moved out of his embrace entirely. She reached out to touch his cheek and then withdrew and stood up, beaming again "I'm going to get something to drink, ok?"

It was a small thing, but he didn't understand her at all. She had realised that, Hiwatari knew, and it didn't make her happy but it didn't make her sad either. When he realised though, he felt a bit regret and yet, still, they could never have been perfect.

"I'm going away for three weeks tomorrow" Hiwatari told her that night, as he typed into the computer. She looked up from her own books and notes, almost surprised.

"Tomorrow?" it sunk in "Oh. That's too bad"

"I'll see you after that"

"No you won't"

"Excuse me?"

"You won't be able to. I was going to tell you later, but in two weeks I'm going away to visit a friend in England for four weeks"

"I see"

"Yes. She's a very good friend of mine. I haven't told you about her. I won't be able to see you"

"There is nothing that can be done about it then" he said, as if it was bad "I will see you when you return then"

She nodded, looking down and then looking back up again. Their eyes met and hers flickered away though he kept his steady gaze on her, unyielding and strong. This time they both understood. It was fragile.

* * *

The first week wasn't bad at all, in fact Kia was happy. She had more free time, all to herself, no obligations, more work getting down, more fun happening. She had a writer's block, though it was remedied by getting drunk at the end of the week. Tala took her home, laughing.

The second week was good too. She was writing again and still seeing her friends and she felt a bit at peace. She would often sit in her living room, in the soothing, quiet, calm, tranquil, relaxing, restful silence, the numbers on her landline phone helping her count and meditate. She rang him a few times, leaving a message. She felt at peace

The third week was fun, fun, fun! It was amazing. The nights and days blurred together. She shopped, went out, smiled. England was cold, and cosy. Her friend, her lovely, supporting, sympathising friend made her happy, keeping her busy with activites so she had no time to think. The weeks flowed together – fourth, fifth.

The sixth week was peaceful. She stayed inside a bit, writing, drinking sweet wine and chatting with her friend, meeting new people, new_ men_. She wrote and smiled and giggled and laughed. She felt happy and not once, not even a single time, not even when she was alone, did she think about home or her apartment. She only spoke to Tala a few times, when he asked her when she was coming back and said he was missing her, to which she responded that she was not missing him, no, most certainly _not_.

It was warm when she came back, stuffy and thick. Her apartment was unaired, the bitter wine unfinished, like no one had entered for a long time. The exhaustion that night hit her, and she went to bed early, not thinking at all and certainly not pondering in bed for exactly two hours and seven minutes, attempting to distract herself by counting sheep. _Definitely not._

* * *

It was so, so ironic that Kia actually wanted to laugh. She had been rushing to see Mika, for advice, taking a shortcut for the first time through the main administration department, when she saw him. And then he saw her.

He had been flirting with the woman because she had on a stupid, coy smile that Kia could have never mirrored, nor had the guts to reproduce. He, too, had been smirking, in an infuriatingly familiar manner. Kia was stunned for a moment and she looked away, searching for herself and then she looked back, smiling politely, strangely and feeling completely stupid as she nodded once, before continuing. He made no response. In fact, his eyes had just flickered to hers and he had neither seen her nod, nor her smile.

"Tilwaree-san!" Kia looked past him, where her colleague stood and almost grimaced. Both he and the woman had separated and straightened at the call and as Kia moved towards them and past them, she saw his eyes centre on her colleague and she forced herself to smile.

"Yes?" she questioned pleasantly. The man smiled back.

"I'm sorry to trouble you," he said "but I was sure you were going to see Tsukishiro-san. Could you pass on these papers to her, they're about a publication alteration. Some books are being transferred to another publishing house and I think a few of them concern her"

"Of course. Do you know which publication house it is?"

"Hiwatari Enterprises" He leaned and spoke softly then, and Kia felt herself go cold "But don't say anything though, the president is standing just over there. He came all the way to sign the deal himself"

"Of course" she repeated, and smiling she receded her steps. As she was walking away she heard someone clearing their throat. Ignoring it, Kia walked faster. Behind her she heard the woman asking him if he wanted a drink. She heard him refuse, almost absently. She heard him speak again, though she didn't know what he said, and then she couldn't hear him.

Twenty minutes later, Kia was still in Mika's office, anxiously watching her. Mika finally looked up.

"Your books are being transferred as well" she confirmed.

"I knew it!" Kia muttered with vehemence. Mika sighed regretfully.

"Kia, don't look into it much. It's impossible that he got to choose which authors he was having. It was a much larger deal than that. This has also been going on for about a year you know and he hadn't taken over then so it had nothing to do with him"

"Still!" Kia protested.

"I'll still be your editor, we can have a personal arrangement. You can refuse theirs, it completely viable"

Kia sat back and let her anger sink in, she knew what Mika was going to say next.

"However" Mika started, smiling because she knew Kia had heard this a million times, "you need a change. It is important and I would recommend it"

Kia nodded. Whether it was now or never, she would still come to the same conclusion, no matter how much her anger was clouding her. What Mika said was logical, she could not blame him. Somehow that made her angrier.

"You are right as usual" Kia conceded, and Mika smiled, triumphant.

Kia had her pride, but she also held more affection. Hiwatari had more pride (or so she thought) but he could get away with it more easily. She wondered who would give in first. Shaking her head, exhausted, Kia looked back up at her editor.

"But I have my conditions of course" she said, calling Mika back to reality.

That evening Kia sat in the living room for a while, unmotivated and bored, waiting for Tala to arrive. On the coffee table she found her long forgotten book, the one she'd finished the last evening she had seen Hiwatari. Frowning painfully she reached out and picked it up, flicking to the back pages, rereading. She had almost reached the end when her front door opened and her friend called out. She didn't reply, but somehow her transfixion with the book stopped and she curled up and stared far off into a distance. Tala entered the room and dropped down heavily next to her with a sigh.

"You alright?" he asked wordlessly taking the book from her, inspecting it carefully. When she didn't respond he glanced at her and a slow smile spread over his face.

"Was it that good?" he asked, grinning. Her lips twitched upwards.

"Brilliant"

"Oh Kia…" he said, putting an arm round her shoulders, "It must be heart wrenching to know that there are so many people out there who are better than you"

"Oh shut up!" Kia laughed, her face tired "It just makes me feel a bit bad, that's all. And she put so much effort into it, and so much sincerity while I just pretend"

Tala faked a yawn and Kia mockingly hit him. He laughed.

"Don't take it to heart Tilwaree-san. There are always going to be things that are going to get you down, but that doesn't mean you get into depression because of it, and besides, I would miss seeing your smile"

Kia beamed, then laughed, turning her face away in slight embarrassment. Then softly she admitted.

"I know. It was a bit sad too though. I enjoy my life now anyway, so no matter what, we'll have fun!"

"That's the spirit!" Tala said, grabbing her hand to pull her up. She hugged him.

"Thank you Tala-kun, you always understand me so will" he snorted softly.

"And the only misfortune is mine"

They laughed as they got ready to leave, Tala continuing his teasing. Just as they were at the door however, the phone rang and Kia, after sighing loudly, turned back to receive it.

"Tilwaree speaking" she said.

"Hello, Kia-san" the soft voice of Elani spoke through the phone. Kia blinked and straightened in her surprise. She glanced at Tala, who stood with raised eyebrows, before responding.

"Elani-chan? That is you, is it not? How are you?"

"I am well Kia-san and I hope you are too" there was something off in her voice "I am calling you on an urgent matter and I hope you will forgive me the formalities for getting straight to the point"

"Of course Elan-chan, what's wrong?" Tala moved towards her as her face twisted further into a frown of worry.

"Have you broken up with my brother?"

"Excuse me?" Kia felt quite taken aback, but the urgency did not leave the girl's voice.

"You know he can be difficult Kia-san" she said "he loves you, you know? You must be patient with him. He also has a lot of work so he is distracted -"

"Elani-chan! Enough!" Kia was slightly outraged "I do not appreciate you making apologies for your brother, firstly because it is not your place and secondly because _you_ know that his pride will never forgive it. Don't do it again. If we ever have problems they will be for us to sort out, not for you to resolve. As for not being with your brother anymore, was that something he implied?"

"No…." Elani started timidly.

"Then don't cause trouble!"

"I'm sorry Kia-san!" Elani-chan protested, also a bit offended "But I was only worried about onii-san!"

Kia calmed herself, taking consolation from Tala's amused smile.

"Fine" she said "What is it?"

"My parents, Calica and I are very concerned about his health. It seems he has been working non stop for the last six weeks"

"Most people work Elani-chan" Kia said, a bit annoyed.

"You don't understand! It was necessary for Kai to go over to see my great-uncle for some time and do some work for the take over. The process was supposed to last six weeks but mother found out from great-uncle that Kai managed it in three weeks. Apparently he stayed up most nights and worked non-stop and he said it was because he wanted to get back to Tokyo quicker!"

Kia stayed silent. She didn't know how to respond to that. Elani sensed her shock, but continued.

"But he's still doing that! We are worried about him Kia-san. He's going to work himself to death. Mother and Father are hoping that it will go away on its own because they know how obsessed he gets but I'm worried Kia-san! They didn't want me to say anything to you, but I couldn't help it. My onii-chan isn't thinking straight!"

Still Kia couldn't respond. She felt her breath shorten and her gaze waver. Her grip tightened on the phone. _Of course, of course, it all made sense now. How could she have been so insensitive? Why couldn't he have been more clear?_

"Kia-chan?" Tala's voice pulled her out of her stupor. In the phone she heard Elani's silence.

"Elani-chan-" she started but the girl's cold voice spoke through.

"I see Kia-san. Do not worry. I can see it is not your problem anymore. I am sorry to have disturbed you. Enjoy your evening"

She hung up and Kia could only stare at the phone in shock. She put it down and hit Tala.

"What?!" he said, rubbing his hurt arm.

"Why did you speak up?! Now she's gone and misunderstood! That girl will hate me for life!"

"How was I supposed to know" Tala said, equally annoyed "And it won't make much difference will it. Most people dislike you on sight!"

"Argh! This is not the time for that!" she cried, grasping and pulling at her hair, ready to almost tear it out "Why does that Hiwatari have to complicate my life so much?!"

Tala straightened and his expression turned serious.

"He doesn't complicate it, it just feels that way to you because you care about him so much" his voice was strange and unreadable.

Kia's face softened and she looked up at him sadly. Slowly she nodded and then after a brief pause she spoke.

"I'm sorry Tala, I won't-" he interrupted her by ruffling her hair.

"I know Kia-chan, it's no big deal. Come on, I'll give you a lift there"

She smiled up more brightly with him, overwhelmingly grateful. He understood her perfectly, she didn't know what she'd do without him.

* * *

Kia reached his house in the early evening, but he didn't return at first. She slept till late and when she woke up it was a little before midnight. She groggily searched for him but he still hadn't returned. The next time she woke up it was early morning, and she had fallen asleep on the couch. Stretching and rubbing her eyes it took her a split second to realise that it hadn't taken her less than a split second to be surprised at being at Hiwatari's home. Then it took her another whole five seconds (because she was so angry at not being surprised) to realise that Hiwatari wasn't home and another full second to remember that that wasn't a good thing. Cursing loudly, she jumped up to get ready.

If she hadn't been so occupied she would have actually enjoyed stumbling around at home, rushing to his room, where she had dropped her bag, to grab some clothes and then run to the bathroom, stripping on the way to have a quick shower. Somehow it didn't matter that she had left the bathroom door open – she should have been worried by how comfortable she felt.

Pinning back her hair and grabbing her bag, Kia ran out of the door. She knew exactly where she was going.

She thought about getting a taxi but somehow she was running to get a train. The first ones should have started. It was still before the office and school rush so she didn't have too much trouble. When she got off she glanced at a paper in her hand and moved towards the address. It was a high floor in a skyscraper. She approached the central desk, not even granting a glance around to the rest of the area. It was now past the start time of working hours.

"Good morning" said the young woman at the desk, smiling at her strongly "How can I help?"

"I need to see Hiwatari" Kia answered. The woman's smile faltered.

"Excuse me?"

"I must see Hiwatari Kai immediately. It is very urgent"

The woman's expression flickered and she seemed hesitant, but she nodded, reaching for the phone. As she spoke, she watched Kia, so the girl felt she had to look away, almost embarrassed. After putting the phone back down she turned to Kia.

"I'm afraid that won't be possible, the president is in a meeting at the moment"

"It's extremely necessary that I see him, please mention my name to him. I'm-"

"I'm sorry, but you don't understand. The president cannot be disturbed at all. We won't be able to even tell him you're here. You will have to come back later, or maybe you can wait here for a while"

She gestured to a few seats positioned close by and Kia had to helplessly retreat. She took a seat and looked around.

The place was very fashionably designed, with bold posters of bestselling books decorating the area, complementing the minimal décor. She saw in a corner, summary of the layout of the office. The editorial department was on the same floor, and the next two floors were devoted to advertising, marketing and the other departments while the top floor housed the president's office and meeting rooms. Kia wondered if she could be bold enough to march up there herself. Then she realised it would be too cliché and no matter the urgency, Kia would _never _be unoriginal.

Instead she decided to ring Aurin. After greeting her and explaining her predicament, which Aurin agreed needed to be resolved, Kia waited for any ideas from the woman.

"Tell him you're pregnant" she volunteered.

"What!" Kia almost yelled "I cannot do that! It won't-! He won't-! Aurin, you don't understand!"

"You haven't done it with him!" she actually sounded shocked.

"That can be discussed later!" Kia pleaded "Just think of something else!"

"Actually it doesn't really matter. With the minimal amount of sleep he's probably been having, he won't realise what's reality and what's fantasy. And this way you can at least bring his attention to _both _things"

"He won't fall for it!" Kia argued "You've got to-!"

Kia paused, she'd seen someone familiar. She told Aurin she'd call her back and quickly hung up. Then she called out.

"Brooklyn-san!" the young man turned and recognised her immediately.

"Tilwaree-san! How are you?"

"I'm fine! What are you doing here?"

He smiled. "I could ask you the same thing. Nevertheless, I heard the main guy here was a bit difficult so I came to sort out the deal myself. We're sort of co-promoting a book unfortunately"

"I see" Kia said, her expression diminishing a bit. "That's good. I won't keep you any longer"

"That's not a problem" he said kindly "I haven't seen you in a while. Got another guy?"

"Something like that" Kia confessed with a growing grin, then it widened into a full smirk. "Hey, can you do me a favour?"

"Sure" he said a bit hesitantly.

"You know the guy you're having a meeting with, the president, will you give him a message from me?"

"You know him?" Brooklyn asked, as he watched her take out a piece of paper and jot a small note down. She nodded, folded it and handed it to him.

"Don't let me keep you" she said happily "And I apologise if your meeting gets cut short"

"Still up to your tricks I see?"

"You have no idea!" she grinned wider and he nodded with an equally wide smile. He seemed to leave and then he turned back, undecidedly.

"Do you want to get together sometime again?"

"Sure, Tala's got my number if you want, but I've definitely got another guy"

He laughed, "No problem, I get it"

Kia waited anxiously as he disappeared up the stairs, moving to the reception once but receiving a negative shake of the head from the woman. She sat down and waited. It would not be long. Sure enough, someone called her name and she saw Hiwatari walking up to her.

She knew people were watching him, the receptionist stood stiff, almost paralyzed. Some watched in apprehension, others with curiosity, but there was respect, she noticed. He also completely disregarded them. She would have to remind him of that later.

Hiwatari looked strangely alert, Kia saw, but his eyes were a bit too bright and his face a little bit too pale. His stride was strong however, and nor did his gaze waver. It was with grudging admiration that Kia accepted that he still looked good, much, _much_ better than she did after all-nighters.

"You should have had better sense than to send this up with that man!" he hissed at her, hauling her to her feet with a painful tug at her arm. Kia had to remind herself that he was tired and that meant that he would be at his worst.

"Sorry" she allowed "It was the only way to tell you, the receptionist wouldn't let me see you and your phone was off"

Hiwatari ran a hand through his hair and looked around as if searching for an answer, then he nodded, but Kia noticed his apprehension. Then, as if at a loss to do, he turned to the woman at the desk who jumped slightly as he pierced his frightening glare at her.

"Tilwaree-san is given priority to see me" he informed her, gesturing to Kia "Tell her where I am if she needs to know and if she still insists on contacting me, you will allow it"

The woman nodded and Kia noticed, regretfully, a few other workers' eyes widen. This was not going to register well.

"This is not good!" Hiwatari said, turning back to her and taking her hand to lead her way. Kia gladly noted that they moved to the exit and when they entered the lift he disengaged her.

"How could this have happened?" he said, in an angry whisper "What are we going to do? If any one finds out..!"

Kia looked at him carefully, noting his reaction. She wasn't sure what to feel. She had expected him to be surprised but not so distressed, maybe he wasn't as serious about them as she'd thought. She tried not to think about it too much, because truthfully, it wasn't something she wanted at the moment either. However, her mind probed, because it was not something she would abandon nevertheless. Feeling uncomfortable, Kia pushed those thoughts away from her mind and focused on being glad Aurin's plan had worked.

"Kia!" Hiwatari called her attention "Have you thought about this at all!?"

Kia sighed and stopped herself from looking unhappy. She looked at him steadily and spoke softly.

"Let's just wait for a few seconds okay. Wait until we get home and then we'll talk about it"

To avoid saying anything Kia rang Mika to tell her she wouldn't be coming to work. What she received was worse news.

"You do understand you can't do this again, right?" Mika told her "You've been missing work spontaneously too often Kia, and with the lack of effort you've been putting into your post, they'll sack you soon enough"

Kia sighed and avoided Hiwatari's eyes.

"Just warn me before they do it so I can resign myself" she said "its probably for the best. It'll give me more time to worry about my writing"

They had a slight squabble over who was going to drive and eventually Hiwatari let her, for she was extra forceful and he didn't want to strain her. Kia almost laughed when he admitted it. She was enjoying making a fool of him.

When they reached home, he insisted upon a discussion which Kia partook in for a while before she pretended to have a headache. It wasn't much pretence, because Hiwatari's reaction against her excuse of pregnancy was a bit off putting. He immediately let her rest, and when she insisted that he stay with her, he agreed without hesitation. As Hiwatari fell asleep within seconds, Kia silently mused that he must've been extremely tired, extremely overworked indeed if he had let himself be led into everything she'd done.

* * *

When Hiwatari woke up it was incredibly quiet. He was sleeping on his own bed feeling extreme comfort. He was turned towards his window and he noted it was dark, but he didn't seem to care. It was also a bit cold and his clothes felt uncomfortable but he didn't move. Slowly he felt things appearing in his brain as if a blurred image was being smoothed out. The voices outside his room became clearer.

"…won't ever believe you again though!"

"It doesn't matter" that was definitely Tilwaree's voice "As long as he gets some sense into his head. And he calls me dramatic"

There was a laugh. He turned his head to look at the door, through which shone cracks of light.

"I can't believe you actually did it! The man must've been shocked"

"Hmm" Kia said, and he was a bit surprised by her lack of response "I guess"

"Was it okay not to go to work today?" there was a long pause and Hiwatari assumed she had answered with a nod, or a shake of a head, either way, he was curious as to her response.

He sat up in bed and waited in a state of half-consciousness until the voices faded to a soft murmur. He leaned his head on the wall and closed his eyes, the silence and exhaustion gently lulling him. He hadn't figured out the situation yet. He didn't know how long after the door opened, letting in some light, and Kia's head peeked through. Her face was shadowed.

"Hiwatari?" she said softly and he opened his eyes, still blurry. "Hello"

He nodded in response and she approached the bed, sitting next to him. He tried to focus on her face but his eyes kept slipping shut. She laughed softly and he decided it didn't matter, he could hear her nevertheless.

"Aurin was just here" she told him "she said hi"

Again he nodded, feeling something nagging the back of his mind. He turned his thoughts in that direction and wondered if he'd forgotten something at work. It was strange, it was almost as if he couldn't remember going in today, and he must've, since there was that meeting with the annoying guy from BEGA….Hiwatare's eyes snapped open, sleeping seemingly disappearing.

"You're pregnant" he said, and her eyebrows rose, "Oh God. I almost forgot. I can't believe…."

Kia waited patiently as memory and sense returned to him.

"Wait a second"

She smiled. Finally.

"You _can't_ be pregnant"

His deductions were truly remarkable.

"You tricked me!" a pause "Unless…"

"I did trick you" she confirmed quickly, not wanting him to go down the other route.

"And I must say," she added, amusedly "I can't believe you believed it. How was that?"

"It wasn't like that. I've been working non-stop and I haven't slept more than four hours for the past week and -!"

He saw her face changing into a knowing, telling expression and his mouth pursed into a thin, angry line.

"I see" he said.

"Good" she answered, smiling "I'm glad you understand how idiotic you truly are"

He didn't respond to that, but she saw his face harden. She slowed herself to be a bit more lenient and spoke gently instead.

"You know," she started "If you do really want to finish your work quickly to come back home sooner that's alright with me, but at least tell me so I can appreciate it. And when you do come back, don't ruin the objective by just immersing yourself ridiculously in more work, because even if _you_ don't care about your health, others do and it worries them"

His eyes widened briefly and he turned his face away. She made sure not to laugh, he'd had more of an ego buster than he'd deserved. There was a short silence where he did not acknowledge her, and then her spoke suddenly.

"What time is it?"

"About half-past eight, and unless you're hungry you might as well sleep"

"I'm feeling quite replenished actually and I'm nit hungry"

"Sorry Hiwatari, it's only one or the other. You don't get any other options"

"And why do you get to dictate my life"

"Because I don't trust you to do anything right"

"Certainly the woman who cannot handle her job efficiently has no base to tell me how to do anything right"

"My job isn't right" she said, as way of an argument.

"Might as well be, but that only reinforces my point"

"Listen Hiwatari" she said, with losing patience "I don't care what you think, you're only doing what I say at the moment, and that is either eat or sleep"

"Seeing as you're a clever author an all, I will take the euphemism fully" he drawled, arrogantly, childishly, "I opt to sleep"

"Very well" she sighed, but the glint did not disappear.

"With you" he added, and there was nothing innocent about it.

"I am also an author who incorporates romance considerably in her stories, so I'm just going to edit what you said"

"But you're not the editor" he reminded her, and she couldn't help but pause to express her distaste at the corniness of the conversation.

"Hiwatari," she said firmly, definitely not laughing, or smiling, "I will not sleep with a man who will request it so bluntly. It makes me wonder about your upbringing, because you are definitely not recommending yourself as a gentleman at all"

"I blame it on sleep deprivation" he said, amused.

"Then I suggest you sleep" she paused "Completely alone"

"The lady is cruel and heartless"

* * *

One of the things Kia discovered about Hiwatari was that what she had had in mind, the ideal, compared to reality was not such a let down at all. When she did her characterisation it was often limited compared to what she encountered in real life and what she learnt was that in real life things aren't stated, nor are they evaluated or deduced, as she'd have liked and done.

Kia was not by any standards innocent, but nor had she literally slept with someone. Her first experience with Hiwatari was strange, because unlike the first time where space required them to be close together, the second time they were on his bed. They didn't sleep close together as she'd thought, instead separated with almost a conscious partition. She had kept her eyes open for sometime, not knowing whether he was asleep or awake because he was so, so still, almost sleeping with restriction.

She reached out to him at one point but felt she'd shatter or taint his angelic image and she recoiled back. She felt a bit far away.

When she had been at a point just before leaving home for university her father and she would have the most monstrous arguments, where her rage would flare and she would shout and hurt him. They always came back to her nagging with guilt and self-shame and she had always told herself that later, after she was older, they would not disagree like that. Later was never.

Kia saw parallels to that with Hiwatari. They would still argue seriously over things they did disagree with, things that breached their personal morals that the other did not believe, or simply know about. There would always be misunderstandings, purposeful provocations because they were so volatile and so prideful, so similar that clashing was inevitable. Vulnerability stayed an acquired trait.

She smiled as she looked at his face, still and unresponsive and almost laughed out loud. They would also have to work primarily on their communication. It would become incredibly inconvenient if they had apprehensions after every short period of parting or misinterpretation. It was funny but also strangely lonely.

There was also something that she couldn't describe, an almost consciousness of imperfection that scared her, that heightened their frailty. Kia could not necessarily be happy with Hiwatari and nor he with her, there was no guarantee of that, but she liked him.

He wasn't a luxury, more like a balm, or medicine. She wanted to stay near him no matter how unhappy she felt, he was an addiction, a sweet, unsafe one. She knew contrarily, that if she chose someone who would be kind to her, that her happiness was guaranteed and growing to love someone was not a myth, and she wondered which she would prefer.

She wondered if she pondered on it too much could she convince herself that against him. She wondered what it meant that she was considering it. She wondered if her indecisiveness meant she was not giving enough and that _that _certainly meant it was all wrong. She wondered if she would be unhappy.

The morning after the second time she literally slept with him Kia woke up to find him gone from the bed. She did not know if she had ever embraced him last night, or whether he had ever looked at her tenderly. She did not know if she had felt safe in his arms, but she did know Hiwatari slept beautifully.

When Hiwatari came out of the shower in the morning he found Kia awake and staring at the ceiling, probably far away. She was curled up into herself somehow, grasping the blanket tightly around her body and breathing slowly. He moved the wet strands of hair away from his eyes and she turned as she sensed his movement. She watched him neutrally.

"Did you sleep well?" she asked, after a long pause. He nodded. He had slept enough for a long time, but this he wouldn't mention to her. Touching as it was, he had no desire to hear her nagging again.

"Don't you need to get up?"

"No" she said, looking away "I don't think I'll go into work today"

Something briefly troubled him, irritating him. He narrowed his eyes.

"Don't be ridiculous! Are you adamant upon losing your job?"

She looked back at him again and her expression was untroubled, unnaturally so.

"Something like that" she sighed "Though you should not concern yourself with it too much. I will make my decisions myself"

His eyebrows rose and he scoffed softly, hoping to provoke her. However Kia merely turned away, closing her eyes, breathing evenly, and counting in her head. Damn pride.

**Hi!!! I'm back! **

**It was another move, a new place and all that…….therefore I have reason. Things are also a bt hectic at the moment and I realise that this chapter might not be entirely comprehensible, but I will answer all queries to the best of my ability.**

**I hope you realise at what I'm hinting here in their relationship and I was also wondering if there was someone who could work out the pattern in the chapter titles – it's quite simple – and confirm the objective of each chapter!**

**As I say, if there are any confirmations needed on anything to with the plot, tone, characterisation, either say it in the review or send me message. Don't hesitate to yell at me if everything's generally a bit vague too!!**

**I will do my best with **_**Why Do I Care**_**, but unfortunately, I make no promises!**

**K.T**


	9. discomfort

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* * *

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Chapter 9

Hiwatari was talking to her, but she wasn't listening. The strange thing was, though he knew that he didn't seem to care and just kept talking. She had innocently asked him about his day at work and when he had answered her with a heavy sigh she had probed until the troubles came spilling out. However, it seemed to Kia that he didn't need to discuss them (she wouldn't have understood the administration much anyway) only rant and speak them aloud until their insignificance, and their solutions presented themselves. They were seated opposite each other, crossed-leg on the floor of the study. Their knees were touching but Hiwatari was leaning back on his hands, away from her. Slowly, still hearing the gentle melody of his voice, she reached out, finally unable to keep her hands to herself and started to play with his shirt.

His torrent did not cease, nor pause, but he grabbed her hand and stroked her palm. She fidgeted because it tickled but did not protest. His nail purposefully scratched the inside of her hand then and she gave a short yelp.

"Watch it!" she said pulling her hand back, which he promptly reached out for again. She peered into his face now that he had stopped talking "Better?"

"I suppose so. It's nice not hearing _your _voice whining for once"

She laughed, squeezing his hand a bit harder than affection required. He was watching her strangely so she met his gaze squarely, but it wasn't threatening or smothering. The crimson distracted her but the curiosity and hesitance in them demanded more of her attention.

"What?" she asked and he licked his lips to ready his response.

"There is a social gathering next week," he muttered "I'm required to attend. It's sort of a business meeting as well, for all the big publishers"

"Oh?" she commented confusedly "Are you going to be out of the city then?"

He did have to work a lot, but it had subsided as he got more used to his job, but this time he shook his head. She waited as he formulated words.

"It's in Tokyo…and I'm...I'm required to attend wi-"

"Then what's the problem?" she interrupted "I promise I won't die because I can't see you"

"Tilwaree-san, please listen." he hissed "I am expected to attend with someone"

He let the statement hang as she considered it for a second before bursting into laughter. His lips spread into a bitter sneer.

"Seriously!" she laughed "I know we don't go out often but surely shouldn't you just be telling me get ready and come, on the day, like you usually do? How come you're asking all of a sudden?"

"You misunderstand. The event will be heavily publicised, and I was not certain you would be comfortable with that"

"Be comfortable with officially announcing my attachment to you, you mean?" she asked, brow furrowing. He contemplated her words and then shrugged in agreement. She smiled a bit.

"I'm okay with it. Didn't you forget, I'm pregnant with your child – surely that says something about commitment"

He smirked at that, pulling her forward so she was half on his lap with their foreheads touching.

"I am inclined to do something to secure your commitment more" he said "Now that you talk about pregnancy"

She groaned "Aurin said this would happen"

"It was her idea then?" he asked her as he kissed her. She nodded "I guess I need to thank her for bringing _it_, or the lack of it, to my attention"

"Like it wasn't there in the first place"

He laughed uncharacteristically, and then stared at her seriously.

"Are you sure?" he asked, questioning about the event and something more.

"Of course" she mumbled, embarrassed at having to be this frank, "I do like you"

He nodded, and then he kissed her swiftly again, pulling her very, very close, like he wasn't going to let her go all night. And she was sure he wasn't, Kia mused absently, before her attention drifted to much, _much_ more important things.

* * *

Hiwatari tapped his foot in frustration as he stared at the closed door. Kia had come home late assuming he too would be working overtime. Ever since she'd had problems with her job, she'd desperately tried to compensate it by working more. It didn't help that she'd forgotten the publishing event was that night. Since she'd returned she'd disappeared first into the bathroom and then barred entrance to _his _room as she changed in there. He knocked for the first time.

"We should probably leave" he said, quietly so as to not agitate her. Silence answered him and then there was a soft thump as she dropped something. Hiwatari leaned his head against the door as he waited but still, apart from the mysterious noises she didn't answer. When she walked out however, he nearly fell off his feet. Simply because he'd been leaning against the door, of course.

She grabbed his arm to steady him and then made him face her, an expectant look on her face. He surveyed the girl.

She was wearing a long shimmery dress coloured in a hue of gold that complimented her dark complexion. It hung till her knees where it cut off into a diagonal hem, revealing her calves and bare feet. Her shoes were clutched in her hand, which was adorned with a thin bracelet with a small bell on its end that tinkled as she lifted her arm. He turned his gaze back to her face.

"Aren't you going to do anything about that hair?" he asked curtly and she smiled crookedly, shaking her head in negative.

He nodded and frowned, but was in acceptance. It looked fine. Though it was let down it wasn't as free as he was used to seeing, but pinned back demurely. He had always seen Kia dressed smartly, in work clothes or in casual jeans, so he was a bit surprised. Strangely enough though, it suited her.

"So are you going to let me get to the door to put on my shoes" she was watching him amusedly as he continued to look over her. He nodded, flinching out of the trance and led her to the door. Softly she spoke.

"You look very nice" she commented, laughter in her voice. He thanked her and then smiled as well.

"So do you"

Kia was quiet throughout the whole time they took to reach the venue. Her voice trembled when she spoke to him and he wondered whether she was nervous or excited. When they reached however and exited the car to enter the building she laughed in surprise and her face relaxed.

"What is it?" he wondered.

"This is a regular event, is it not?" she said, looking at him with intelligence "A social gathering but also to make connections. I met Mika here you know"

"You attended with the publishing house?" Tsukishiro-san would attend as she was a top end editor, but Kia couldn't have come with her publishing company. She wasn't very high up, and it had nothing to do with her department.

"No, no" she said, smiling at the memory "I was accompanying someone. It was strange. I had never met Mika before that, even though we interacted, but that was only through my agent. It was nice to know her though, much easier to work. At that time I was also looking for a job; it got me a recommendation for the one I have now. A useful evening"

"You accompanied someone?" Hiwatari probed, curious and demanding. She smiled at him but was saved from answering as they entered and were swarmed by the party.

Hiwatari was greeted often and Kia happily stepped back. The words flew past her and she pondered on how different it was than the last time she'd come there. Then, it had been her changing moment. She had been pulled forward unwillingly and suddenly she could see how better it was now. Now she understood why she had changed _then_. She grinned when she received speculative looks, but he did not pull her any closer. She was free to leave; he wanted her to know that. Every person who he spoke to, she introduced herself - because she could, he didn't do it for her. She wondered what the others were thinking – was she a companion or a business partner he had run into on the way in. A smile tugged at her face.

"Kia-chan?" A voice penetrated through the conversation that she was observing quietly. Hiwatari's voice stumbled over his words but he continued as Kia turned to find the person calling her. Moving swiftly towards her was Brooklyn. She met him halfway.

"Hi!" she greeted "I should've known you would be here. How are you?"

"Good. What about you? How come you're here? Did you come with Tsukishiro-san"

"No, I'm-!"

She stopped as a cold hand slightly touched the back of her neck. She looked up to see Hiwatari standing next to her. He was standing quite close, almost moulded with her body. He nodded at Brooklyn.

"It is good to see you. I am sorry about missing our meeting the other day"

"Not at all, Hiwatari-san. I had never expected such a quick meeting anyway, but I am sure we can meet soon again"

"Of course" he acknowledged, then he turned to Kia "Would you like something to drink, I'm heading to the refreshments table?"

"Sure, anything will do" she said, a bit hesitantly.

"Have fun" he called absently as he left, sending her a sly look. She watched him in confusion trying to decipher his meaning and then turned back to Brooklyn apologetically when he coughed to get her attention.

"You're here with Hiwatari-san then?"

"I think so. Though it is possible I might just have received an invitation and run into him purely by coincidence. With his behaviour, I can never tell"

Brooklyn nodded, though he didn't seem entirely certain of how to take her statement. She quickly smiled to smooth over the bitterness that had entered her tone at her comment. He responded as amiably.

"So how have you been?" she asked.

"Very well" he answered "Working a bit more, but enjoying myself a bit more as well"

"Could you do that sabbatical you had planned?"

"No" he paused, as if it was something it was a memory he had forgotten. How quickly plans change.

"Oh. I always thought it had been important"

"Yes, it was then, but now I can live with short holidays. That was a different time"

She inclined her head softly in acceptance, smiling amusedly and he slowly stepped closer, more at ease.

"If I am correct, the last time you attended this event was with me?"

"It was" she agreed "And it was a pleasant experience"

Hiwatari's presence stopped her from saying more. He handed her a glass of water which she received with slight annoyance as she watched him delicately sip his expensive wine. He smirked at her once, and moved to go away when she downed the glass fully and presented it to him with a watery smile.

"More, please?"

"I'm not here for your convenience you know Tilwaree-san

"Are you quite sure Hiwatari? I always thought otherwise"

He did not reply but nor did he leave, instead he turned to Brooklyn.

"I was unaware you two knew each other" he said, glancing at Kia from the corner of his eye. She was looking at him warily.

"I did not know you two were acquainted either" Brooklyn countered, and Kia wondered if it was only she who sensed a rising tension. Hiwatari's brows too had risen unnoticeably at the remark.

"We are" Hiwatari was smirking openly now "quite intimately"

Kia let out a small sound of outrage and managed to misplace her footing so her heel dug into his foot hard. They both smiled at each other, their smiles stretched thin over their lips. She lifted her gaze back to Brooklyn's.

"It was nice to see you" she said politely, dismissively as Hiwatari took her hand for the first time to lead her away. The man graciously let them part.

"Old boyfriend?" he asked, as they walked away.

"Jealous?" she sneered.

He scoffed. "Of _him_?! I'd be more wary of Valkov-san"

"Don't be idiotic!" she hissed "Tala's been spending so much time with you, I wouldn't be sure if he was my best friend or yours!"

"Just shows how good his sense of taste is" Hiwatari laughed and pulled her to him, and arm affectionately wound round her waist. Kia tensed and did not lean in fully, glad they weren't in view of flashing cameras. Though the evening proceeded satisfyingly, the night was more rewarding.

* * *

"I spoke to Ryushi today. He mentioned they'd made some decisions about the wedding" Hiwatari lifted his attention from his food and gave her his full attention.

"Yes, I heard as well" he smirked "Seems as if they're tired of their engagement"

"Do you know the details" Recently they'd taken to eating at home, and Kia was seated next to him on the rarely used table in his kitchen. It was a very _domestic_ experience.

"They want to have it in Tokyo soon. I think they've set the date already as well. They'll be here to prepare for it. Father and Mother should come as well"

"I see" she murmured, intrigued by his flat tone "Any idea on the location"

"I'm letting them use the Hiwatari house in Tokyo for the ceremony and reception"

She stared at him a moment. They'd always avoided this topic.

"Hiwatari house...?" she started hesitantly "Is it that-?"

"Yes" he interrupted her forcefully.

"Oh" there was no enthusiasm in her voice "That'll be nice. Calica must really want to celebrate in her family house"

"It's not really her family house" Hiwatari suddenly said, straightening up and facing her, pushing away his empty plate. "It's _my _family house"

"And the difference is?" she prompted.

"Calica isn't really my sister, she's my cousin"

Kia was taken aback. Hiwatari watched her for reaction but she silently urged him to continue, unable to come up with an appropriate response.

"My parents died when I was five and as my grandfather was unable to look after me, I lived with my aunt and uncle. I have been living with them for a long time now and respect them. They brought me up and in a way they are my parents. We have a comfortable relationship"

Kia nodded. She had never anticipated this scenario and so didn't have enough composure to respond. Hiwatari's face was gaining more amusement at her difficulty. She looked away from him and quietly spoke.

"So how come I didn't know about this before?"

"I wanted to tell you" he replied "but I wasn't sure how to approach it. There aren't many conversations leading up to the story, but this was opportune"

"So the house is from your grandfather to you?"

"Yes, though my aunt and uncle, my parents, feel they have every right over it. And they are correct– that was the reason they gave me a hard time over almost selling it"

"Oh" they were approaching weary ground. They had never discussed his intentions about that incident.

"Though I didn't see what all the fuss was about. It was going to return to the family eventually"

Kia's head shot up, shocked, to meet his innocent eyes.

"I mean my sister would get married to your brother, so there would be sort of a connection, no?"

She hissed at him and he laughed, pushing a kiss to her forehead before he grabbed her plate and utensils to clean up. Kia sat on the counter and they chatted through the night in the bright lights of the room.

* * *

One point of continuous argument between her family was the amount of time she spent bathing. Her father and brother (being men, she reasoned) had always complained about high water bills, and her excess use of water. She was currently doing that in Hiwatari's bathroom as she pondered her day at work. She had been happily enjoying the warm water when she heard noise from outside the bathroom. It was midweek, and about midday. Kia had a meeting that evening so she had come over to Hiwatari's to change as it was easier, but he should have not been at home. She opened the shower stall and wrapped a towel around herself. She had only opened the door a crack when the door to Hiwatari's room opened and a female walked in. Surprised, she stood still and did not reveal herself.

It was Calica. Immediately, Kia's heart rate went up.

"Kai! There's a bag in your room!" his sister called out "Is it the same woman's whose shoes are at the door?"

She didn't receive a reply, but Kia heard a muffled yell. Hiwatari entered the room and widened his eyes at the bag. His eyes flickered to the bathroom and he grabbed his sister's arm.

"Don't just enter the room without asking" he steered her out "Come on, out! Settle down, I'll just change and come!"

She protested, teased him about his mysterious girlfriend, but conceded in the end. The moment he locked the door, Kia stumble out of the bathroom, horrified.

"What is Calica doing here?" she said, panic increasing.

"Shit, shit, _shit_!" Hiwatari was muttering "They came earlier than I expected so I forgot to warn you!"

"NO!" Kia moaned, completely forgetting her state of undress "If she finds out, Ryushi will find out and then Dad will find out!"

"I think that's the least of your worries, my _Mother _is here!"

"WHAT!!!"

"_Quiet!!_"

"What are we going to do? What are we going to do?"

He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. Then he sighed and gestured at her.

"Change first, we need to get you out of here"

"Are they going to stay here till the wedding?" Kia asked as she grabbed her stuff and entered the bathroom, speaking through the partially open door.

"That's what it seems like" Hiwatari muttered unhappily as he removed his shirt and put on another one.

"But my stuff's lying around the place –they'll surely notice"

"Probably not" Hiwatari muttered, "I'll move your clothes into my room and keep any other things I come across. We just really need to get you out of here"

"This is so troublesome"

Kia collected her things and turned to Hiwatari. He suddenly moved towards her and kissed her fiercely. She answered with equal fervour, but then pulled away quickly, brushing his cheeks lightly with her lips. He held her for a moment and then pulled away, telling her the best he could do was distract them to give her time to leave.

She crept out as she heard Hiwatari lead them to the study and she had just reached the living room when she hear she soft shuffle of feet. Taking a deep breath, Kia dived through the kitchen into an adjoining storeroom, and waited quietly. There was no sound coming towards her and she was about to leave when Helen Hiwatari entered the kitchen, holding Kia's shoes, observing them speculatively.

"Kai" she called out serenely "are you sure a guest forgot them. It seems strange someone would walk out without their shoes"

Kia was hyperventilating. How was she supposed to leave without her shoes!

"I'll put them away so they won't get lost" his mother continued, when she failed to get a reply. However Hiwatari entered the room at that moment and grabbed the shoes from his mother. His rash actions made the woman pause.

"Thank you mother" he said with polite restraint "I will deal with this myself. Calica is calling you"

She gave him a searching look but left nevertheless. Kia scrambled out of her hiding place and took the shoes from him, giving him another hasty kiss. He was restraining a laugh at her anxious state.

"This is going to be hell" she muttered as she left.

"And very, very enjoyable" he added, pushing her out and closing the door silently behind him.

* * *

Hiwatari's phone rang as they were leaving the house and his parents and sisters watched him inconspicuously as he answered it, detecting the female voice on the other line.

"Hi" he said neutrally, keeping a cautionary eye on his family "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to be late. Ryushi didn't tell me about the dinner until a few hours ago" Kia said hurriedly "There's a bit more work to complete. Do you think it I'll be fine if I came straight from work"

"Sure" he said, and then added in a whisper "Don't take too long, I don't want to have to be left alone with this"

"They're your family you know, it can't be that bad"

"You forget yours will be there as well"

"You have my sympathy, I'll make it as fast as possible"

The two families had arranged to dine together the evening after they had converged in Tokyo. Hiwatari's apartment was now a bit more free as his family were staying in the Hiwatari home and while Ryushi was residing with Tala, his father stayed with Kia. This meant that he had seen nothing of her for a week. That was a pretty long time considering his tolerance for her absence.

It didn't help that the first thing asked was about her and he had to stop himself from talking simultaneously with Ryushi to inform them of her excuse. They left a purposeful seat vacant next to Hiwatari, leaving no illusions about their suspicions, and even asked him to choose food for the girl. She finally arrived however, and after greeting everyone, sat by his side, squeezing his hand gently underneath the table, and he felt their relief flow together.

"So where's the wedding going to be?" Kia asked lightly, and Hiwatari smirked at her pretence. Due to his unwillingness at releasing her hand she was sipping her drink uncomfortably with her left, an action that did not elude the attention of her family.

"At the Hiwatari house" Calica told her excitedly "It's in the outskirts of.....oh....I suppose you already know that"

The tension heightened immediately and Kia yanked her hand away. All eyes were turned towards them.

"I'm sure it'll be a beautiful ceremony Calica-san" Kia tried to change focus.

"I wish Kai would marry soon" Helen sighed, though the smile on her face was hardly regretful. Kia almost groaned. Hiwatari immediately interrupted.

"We will not be having this conversation. Not now, not for a while. I refuse for this to be a repeat of our previous meeting" he said, though Kia could see he was more embarrassed than anything.

"That would be unoriginal Hiwatari" she agreed, and then smiled "but Helen-san made no such reference last time, so certainly this is a new topic"

"Don't you even go there!" he turned on her.

"Just a little fun Hiwatari" she grinned cheekily. His gaze narrowed.

"Very well then." He turned back to their audience "Tell them how your job's going"

"Her job?" Tilwaree-san spoke up "What's wrong with her job"

"_Nothing _is wrong with my job!" Kia protested "Everything is fine"

"You don't say that every day after you come home two hours after extra work"

"Two hours! Kia, what is this about?!"

"So we're playing dirty are we" she snarled "Did you tell them how you worked straight for a week with four hours of sleep? Did you tell them how you fell for my lame excuse of –!"

She cut herself off in time.

"Four hours!" Hiwatari-san said "Kai-kun, have you lost your mind!"

"What excuse?" Calica asked.

"Did you also tell them about the time where you disappeared for a week without telling anyone and gave Hiwatari-kun sleepless nights?" Ryushi interjected gently. Gleeful silence met their ears.

"I am going to kill you for this Ryushi!" Kia muttered, leaning over to strangle her brother.

"After the wedding please" Calica insisted "It seems I only get his money if I marry him"

"What is your shoe size Kia-san?" Helen asked quietly, halting conversation again. Kia and Hiwatari exchanged quick glances.

"Six" Ryushi answered for her. She kicked him under the table.

"Really" Helen's eyes shined "How interesting"

"No, I'm a five. Really"

"Goodness sake!" Elani's thin voice spoke up "Can't you just admit you're with him so we can move on with the conversation. They'll be so depressed about not being able to tease you about it anymore they'll probably forget"

Suddenly their clasped hands were visible on the table and Hiwatari was smirking while Kia blushed a soft pink.

"End of conversation" he declared, as she pulled away from him and focused on her wine glass, wondering absently how her father would feel if she didn't go home that night.

* * *

A few weeks later Kia entered the house later than Hiwatari and walked past him into the kitchen with complete, non-restrained fury. He watched her with raised eyebrows but mostly disregarded her; he had become used to her mood swings by now. The phone rang and he reached for it.

"If it's _him_, then I'm not home"

It was him.

"Kia tells me to tell you she's not home" Hiwatari muttered in monotone and then flinched as the phone was swiped from him violently.

"The answer was no, the answer is no, and the answer will always be NO!"

He watched curiously at first but then with added concern. Kia looked more terrorised than angry. He reached for her and held her by her waist as she continued her conversation, trembling.

"It was never going to be my responsibility. I can't do it" Ryushi interrupted her "That's not the point!.....Ahrg! Why are we even discussing this, there's nothing wrong with otou-san's health so this shouldn't even be an issue!"

"I won't be living there Ryushi!" she was yelling with all her force now "What do you mean I'm the only one who can afford it, you can afford it too! I don't want the responsibility. _Please_, can't you see this is distressing me?"

Ryushi replied calmly and suddenly Kia tensed in his arms. She caught his eye, horrified and pulled away, turning her face away.

"Fuck you Ryushi" she hissed, fully enraged "What are you basing this on, huh? No, _that_ was out of order. I have no intention of getting help from _anyone_!"

Hiwatari flinched. It didn't take much guessing to know who they were talking about. Despite her whispering he could still hear her.

"There is no guarantee of anything you fool! Just because you're fully committed doesn't mean it's going to work out that way for me as well, okay. I'm not coming with you to Osaka......No, I mean it Ryushi – I can't do it"

She looked towards him now, frightened, but he didn't move towards her. It seemed she was afraid of him.

"Fine. Don't say anything silly. I'm handing over the phone" she gave it to him and they held their gaze as he spoke to Ryushi.

"Speak to her please Hiwatari-san, I know she's just a bit nervous. She didn't mean what she said, I'm sure, she's just looking for excuses to refuse the house. I'll leave the key with her neighbour, please tell her that"

Kia had been staying with him for a week since the dinner as Ryushi had suggested this would allow him to stay in her apartment and not impose on Tala. There had been no protests, though Elani did giggle a lot. As soon as he'd set the receiver down she was standing in front of him, still shivering. He gathered her into his arms and stroked her on the back.

"What did he want?"

"Dad's going to change his will. They want me to have the house"

Her thudding heart made sense. He let out a sigh. This was going to be harder than he'd anticipated.

"I don't want it. I seriously don't want it" she said into his shirt "I can't do it. It's too much responsibility. It'll tie me down Hiwatari – I'll _always _have to come back to it. I won't do it"

"I don't suggest you think about it now, Tilwaree-san" he finally said "but I do think you should reconsider it. It can't be as scary as you are anticipating. You need to consider your family members' perspectives as well"

She burrowed her face into his neck further and didn't reply, but he could feel her breathing slowing.

"I think you should go see them in Osaka" he concluded, preparing himself for the onslaught of her temper but she didn't protest. Her eyes looked tired.

"I'm going to take a shower. Can you do something about dinner, I really don't have the energy?"

"Sure" he answered, not letting her escape yet "Don't take too long"

She pulled away from him forcefully and turned away "I will take as long as I bloody well please"

He waited until she left the room to let out his chuckle. When she returned she still looked drained, though calmer. She stiffly informed him that she would be leaving for Osaka, but that he wasn't allowed to comment. Hiwatari asked her whether he was allowed to laugh, and she said yes, but only at the danger of never seeing her naked again. Hiwatari still laughed.

* * *

Hiwatari unlocked the door and stepped in. He took off his shoes slowly and dropped his bag on the way to the kitchen. There he opened the fridge and peered in, his hand poised to reach for the wine bottle. It wasn't there.

"Tilwaree-san, did you..?" his voice trailed away. Of course, she had gone to Osaka. Suddenly the silence of the house crashed into his ears. He closed the fridge softly and stood in the kitchen, staring around aimlessly. His fingers fidgeted slightly. When the epiphany he waited for did not come, Hiwatari decided he was hungry and he would make food. Then he looked around, at loss.

"Eggs..." he muttered, grabbing some to fry "Eggs will be fine"

He cracked them with precision into a bowl and started to whisk. Even then his tempo slowed; he had broken enough for two people. He let the fork rest on the side of the bowl and stepped back.

"Cooking for one is too troublesome" in a situation that was once preferable he now felt unmotivated.

He sat on the sofa looking out to the city. As the weather had warmed the days had grown longer. The sun was still casting its red hue on the large skyscrapers. It was a pleasant image – ready to be plunged into darkness. His eyes closed and her words rang through his mind.

"_There is no guarantee of anything you fool!"_

He flinched. She was right but he hadn't liked that, and he didn't like what she was especially implying. He needed to put on some music; music would disguise the silence. Nothing would hide her absence though. Hiwatari wasn't feeling paranoid all of a sudden, and they often lived away from each other, but _this _fear he could pinpoint. He wasn't ready to lose her. He wished he had something to tie her down with.

Something clicked in his mind. A slow, wicked smirk crept onto his face. It was a good plan, but she wouldn't appreciate the humour. For a few seconds he assessed the threat of her reactions and then asked himself whether he was really bothered.

"Not at all" he whispered, closing his eyes, perfectly satisfied with himself.

* * *

Unpleasant surprise didn't even cover it. More like raging frustration at the inefficiency of a dictionary to convey the complete impact of the adjective that best described an individual's unfortunate encounter with a complete and total bastard.

She was going to kill Tala. Only first, she had to get hold of him.

She had called his mobile first, after a fiery panic attack, then his office – only to be told by his secretary that he should be contactable on his mobile. Though if she was him she too wouldn't answer the phone if she knew someone was out to murder her. It was a surreal situation and she couldn't seem to keep her thoughts straight. Her strength had strained from her journey from Osaka, she was standing out in the rain, she didn't have a house anymore _and _her possessions had vanished.

Repeat? Tala, her landlord, not to mention her _best friend _(no longer though), had kicked her out of her apartment. With no notice. Without her stuff. And now he was unreachable. She was going to make it so that he could never have happiness again.

She considered her options for a few moments and then after long hesitation, decided on calling Hiwatari. He didn't answer the phone. Once again she thought out her choices. Reflecting on the proximity to his workplace, she finally decided to go see him herself. A fifteen minute walk and she had reached the reception, shaking water out of her hair as she waited to be served.

The receptionist recognized her immediately and rang Hiwatari. She informed her that he was on his way back from a meeting, but would speak to her. Kia was handed the phone.

"Tilwaree-san?" his voice was warm "Did you just arrive? I thought you would be at your apartment"

"Have you spoken to Tala recently?" she asked quickly.

"Well, yes I have. Why, is anything wrong? Is he alright?" his voice was sincerely worried.

She gave a sound of affirmation and sighed. Hiwatari asked her to wait for him as he would be there soon, and they hung up not long after. She took a seat near the reception and contemplated.

The absurdity of the circumstances hadn't escaped her, but Kia had an indisputably strange mind that dealt very calmly with queer situations. She wasn't even sure how Tala had managed it as it was not something she'd expected of him. She briefly considered him being in a compromising situation that required such action but it seemed highly unlikely. They had grown up together and she knew there was nothing shady about his past, nor was he indebted to someone. Unless he'd had a crazy streak like Hiwatari – blinded by love into selling his house or something.

Kia chuckled softly. Hiwatari could be counted upon to do reckless things if he really wanted something. He would almost certainly do them in a manner that would create problems and irritation for others, even if it was only to amuse himself. Kia frowned again. It was strange how Tala had got away with it. She hadn't even told him she was going out of town, and the only one who knew was...he was...Kia sat upright and then got up. Her eyes narrowed into slits and her mouth readied a snarl. It was providential that he walked in at that moment.

"Hiwatari" she hissed delicately. His eyes flickered around impatiently until the fixed on her and softened immediately. She steeled her heart; he was _never _going to get away with this.

He was next to her within seconds, pulling her into an embrace, unconcerned about the lack of reciprocation. As he stepped away, she glimpsed amusement in his eyes that sharpened increasingly. Her eyes focused briefly on the material of his suit before she moved back considerably and glared at him. A smirk appeared on his face.

"So what kind of convoluted prank was this?" she asked. Hiwatari sighed.

I've already told you many times Tilwaree-san," he said, patronisingly "You can't just continue the conversation from your head. I don't know what you're thinking, remember?"

"You _evicted _me from my apartment!"

"It sounds bad if you say it like that" he mumbled absently and then winced as she kicked his leg. Then she sighed softly and pressed a hand to her eyes in resignation.

"Seriously," she muttered "do you have a communication problem?"

He blinked once, not understanding her implication; she tutted loudly.

"It's cost effective" he explained "You won't waste rent, less utility bills too"

"That's your reason?" she asked incredulously

"You spend most of your time at home anyway, so it really makes sense"

"I understand your logic" she said slowly "but in such cases one tends not to follow logic. What in hell made you do this, apart from a possibly completely random whim?

"If you want a romantic declaration you'll be waiting a long time. I advise you take your satisfaction from it being a whim" Kia frowned and raised her eyebrows at his answer, then let out a tired breath of air. After sighing some more, she finally met his gaze again and tugged at the material of his clothes.

" Let's just get home for now. I'm drenched to the bone and you really need to get that suit to the cleaners otherwise it'll be ruined. You'll never do it yourself...what?" she paused her nagging at his knowing look.

"I knew there was a reason I wanted you around"

She poked him again, and turned away, sour composure sinking in "This isn't over yet"

She was going to kill Tala. He'd sold her for _him_, the devil, pretty though he was.

* * *

She was sure there was something he wasn't telling her. It had only been a week since she'd moved in, but it was no different than usual since she stayed over so often and since early morning she'd noticed strange things.

She had found out Hiwatari _did_ hold her at night, so tightly that at times it was hard to breathe, but he just didn't like being caught doing it. That morning after hearing a particularly annoying buzzing sound and turning around in the cage his arms had formed around her, Kia had tried to reach for his mobile. However, something seemed to have hit Hiwatari at that moment and he had lunged out of bed and taken the call. In hushed tones, outside the room.

Yeah, she wasn't suspicious.

He didn't let her answer any phones the whole day and when she'd informed him she felt like going shopping, he'd immediately persuaded her that a stay-in, writing-for-the-whole-day plan was a good idea. Then he wouldn't let her cook. Hiwatari _hated _cooking, and moreover he was really bad at it. She drew the line there.

"I'm hungry and I refuse to eat crap" she told him bluntly and he frowned.

"Take out-"

"-is unhealthy" she cut in "Will you just tell me what's going on?"

"You don't want to know, believe me" he consoled "You'll freak out"

"I want to know and I _promise _I won't freak out"

"I'm not telling"

"Fine, I'm cooking"

"Don't, we'll order in"

"I want to cook"

"Your stuff tastes horrible"

"_WHAT??!!_" she turned on him with a death glare and he winced lightly "_Say that again!_"

He backtracked "It doesn't taste bad, but I don't want you to freak out!"

"Just tell me what's going on or I'm going to attack you with a knife!"

"My parents are coming for dinner"

Her mouth fell open, Hiwatari nodded solemnly in agreement.

"I forgot to tell you yesterday and I knew you'd worry too much so I thought it would be better to just pretend it was a surprise. We'll just get some food..."

She was still staring at him in horror. He shifted uncomfortably.

"Don't look at me like that. I'm not used to informing my girlfriend weeks prior to events, I'll remember for next time"

She shut her mouth, slightly amused but nodded silently. She was still in silent shock. Then she moved towards the kitchen.

"Wha-What are you doing?" he blocked her way hurriedly, worrying she was still going for the knife.

"I'm going to cook" she pushed him out of the way "If you think I'm going to let them eat outside food, you've got another thing coming. What will they think of me?!"

It was his turn to smirk slightly. "Worried if they will approve or not?"

"Of course I am!" she screamed, a red blush covering her cheeks "It's not important now but sometime soon-"

"Soon?" he prompted, enjoying her flushing face. She avoided his eyes, so he stood next to her and took the knife to cut the vegetables so she could do something else. She hesitated and then looked at him.

"Soon?" she asked, her voice filled with fear and excitement. He glanced at her sideways.

"It doesn't matter to me _when_. I'm just waiting for you to decide" From the corner of his eye he saw many emotions flicker over her face as she turned her eyes to him and then back to the floor constantly. Finally some resolution entered her eyes and she smiled.

"Soon" she stated in agreement and kissed his cheek on impulse. He suddenly felt very light.

After the dinner, which went spectacularly awkwardly, Kia was roped into a whirlwind of wedding plans by an unrelenting Helen and Calica. Neither her brother nor Hiwatari stayed long to relieve her or to help her escape. Needless to say, they weren't forgiven for long.

The preparations went fine but in the end they did make Kia wish never to have to go through them for a long time. When she told Hiwatari that, just as they were walking into the reception after the wedding, he stopped, glared at her and walked off. She wrote it off as offense taken for his sister. When she told Tala while they were dancing, he stopped and laughed and then he wouldn't explain why. Though he did mutter something about Hiwatari.

Later she danced with Hiwatari for the first time and realised she would never be as good as him. He grinned every time she hit his leg and he brushed his lips against her skin, her hair too often. She was burning by the time they stopped to sit down.

"You two looked beautiful on the dance floor" an older lady said. She was very serene and Kia felt she was familiar but was sure they hadn't been introduced, so she thanked the woman politely.

"Hopefully your turn will come soon as well" the woman continued, a dark gleam in her eye as she regarded them both. Kia choked on her wine and started coughing, and though she could not see Hiwatari, his hand smoothing her back passed the vibrations of smugness.

"Of course" he answered, and she stiffened.

"What are you talking about?" she couldn't help but blurt out softly, aware of the woman's eyes "We haven't even talked about it"

"I believed we shared an understanding" Hiwatari whispered back, amusement smothering her. Anxiety bubbled at the base of her throat.

"Understanding?!" her voice was oddly high pitched "But you never asked me?"

He rolled his eyes, and leant his face closer and spoke in resigned monotone "Will you marry me?"

She stared at him in disbelief and sat back into her chair, closing her eyes and willing him to disappear. When she peeked through them again he was still there, looking away.

"Shouldn't you be nervous or something? Ryushi was so scared" she muttered, pouting, a bit put off. He grinned, shook his head and took her hand.

"But how can I be scared of you?" then it hit her.

"You cannot be serious?" she breathed.

He looked at her steadily and she took a sharp intake of breath. It went in the wrong way and her coughing resumed. Once again, his large hand smoothed her back gently. Someone held out a glass of water to her and she followed the arm to find the old woman's amused face. She took a deep sip, peered at his face and contemplated.

"I guess it isn't such a bad idea"

"It's a brilliant idea Tilwaree-san" he corrected "I suggested it"

She didn't even have the strength to hit him. Nodding once, she kissed his cheek and excused herself to go to the restroom. As she stood however, a hand clamped her down. Now the old woman looked confused.

"Where are you going?" she asked anxiously "What happened? Are you refusing him? Do you need to think it over? How can you refuse him?"

Kia was stunned and she didn't know how to reply. Hiwatari chuckled beside her.

"Leave her alone" he said lightly "And didn't you hear, she agreed it wasn't a bad idea. Isn't that enough to say she wouldn't mind going along with it grandmother?"

Kia nodded along. Hadn't she made sense....wait! Her eyes moved from the old woman's confused face to Hiwatari's triumphant one. He was smirking openly now, beckoning to Tala who came eagerly. She turned her eyes back to the woman's face. _Grandmother!!!_

The women locked eyes and Hiwatari's grandmother's face widened into a smile. Kia gulped dramatically as people surrounded the table. Why did she feel she had made the worst decision of her lifetime?

* * *

**Hello! This has actually been written for a while, only I've been putting off editing it. And I still haven't wanted to, so I apologise – the unedited version. (though to be honest none of the other chapters have gone through what we would legitimise as editing anyway)**

**So things have accelerated considerably.....like really a lot. I'm not quite sure why I did that, but I welcome your opinions. If I had enough patience I would extend it but I've got too worries. One is that the romance will get too heavy and overbearing and another is that the characters will become boring (which possibly has already happened). When writing a romance that is situated in a metropolitan like Tokyo, with jobs demanding long hours, the story concentrates on just two people and it's almost like they're ignoring the outside world for each other – something I can't bear to imply.**

**In terms of **_**Why Do I Care**_** in case anyone's wondering, I'm still working on it. The chapter hasn't even started but I'll update – eventually! (Remember those inspirational reviews? As you will see, they really **_**really **_**do give a lot of motivation)**

**Neways! Hope you enjoyed – please review.**

**Special thanks to **_**misasan **_**who's recent review prompted the update!**


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